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Sparkles McCuntyBee

@actuallyferalab.bsky.social

430 followers 990 following 1K posts

Cryptid spawn of an Eldritch Horror and Goetic Demon. Temporarily inconvenienced by this current form. NB/Agender. she/they/dude

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Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 1d

Would Trump die faster if they lied and said he'd get a posthumous Nobel prize as an exception

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 2d

MAHA boardroom meeting suit: what are some reasons people take Tylenol?
RFKjr: peanus horts
MAHA suit: uh, ok great. What causes penile pain?
RFKjr: circumcisions!
MAHA: ...run with it

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 2d

I have to write a "current events" paper for my Sociology course on Crime, good thing I live in a dystopian hellscape

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 4d

Fact-checking The Ed Gein Story by asking my spouse a bunch of random questions like "did he play the accordion?"

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 4d

Happy anniversary to when Mrs. Krabappel and Principal Skinner were in the closet beheading babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 5d

Dudes would rather be weird about their moms than go to therapy

(re: Monster: The Ed Gein Story)

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 5d

Primary care doc is updating my formal diagnoses: major depressive disorder, anxiety, US citizen

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 5d

I think my sociology professor can tell I hate cops lol

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 6d

My dad played The Men Who Make the Music and We're All Devo! VHS tapes for me as a smol toddler so I guess you can say I was groomed by Devo (who were right about everything)

Jerry Casale and Josh Hager of Devo performing Freedom of Choice live in front of an image of The United States flag with multiple holes burning through it

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 7d

If our transphobic government truly believes trans women are men, wouldn't they be kept employed to avoid more DEI hires (women)?

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 8d

Making my AI actors meet with an intimacy coordinator before we film the next scenes (they're doing it)

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 10d

Watching my political compass dot scooch away from Noam Chomsky and a little closer to Emma Goldman

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 10d

*flirting* maybe we'll end up in the same gulag

6 17

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 11d

Or did he just mean "stop being mean to my boss, the president of the United States, Donald J Trump" ? Either way, whoopsies

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 11d

Is Ted Cruz the Zodiac Diddler

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Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 11d

Received 14 lashings for not clapping

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 11d

Next Spotify Wrapped is getting me waterboarded and thrown in the SHU

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 11d

I hope we at least get a good punk music revival out of this

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 11d

Monitoring trends in CO fragging

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 11d

Barging in to use any bathroom I want because we all sit to shit

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 11d

lol my boss called me "Antifa" during our weekly check-in

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 12d

It's 1:15 in the a.m. and I want to sleep but my brain will not let go of the line "my AI-enabled tractor left me" so I guess I'm writing a country song now

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 13d

I've yelled at military recruiters on campus for saying "we need more *bodies* over there" (re: Iraq). Kids were viewed as future corpses, but for a cause!
Medical and mental health care sucks for vets because we don't expect them to come back. Some do, but "there is no discharge from the war."

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 14d

Reminder to the local Antifa group (charter #8647): voting ends this week for which Chumbawamba song we'll be using as our anthem. It's a tight race between Timebomb and Enough is Enough.

Sparkles McCuntyBee @actuallyferalab.bsky.social · 15d

The Antifa members who sell the most subscriptions to Radical Left Terrorism Monthly win an all-expense paid trip to tour the Alamo's basement