if i said to my boss, "how stupid do you think i am?" she might get mad, but i'm the one who should be mad, because of how stupid she thinks i am. ok? HR should be on my side. if i were to say such a thing.
sometimes you see flashing lights on a truck on the highway but they don't indicate anything traffic-wise. they're just lert lights. (purpose of lert lights: to keep yalert)
saw a flavor of coffee at the store that sounded impossiblely bad so i squeezed the bag to sniff it through the Stink Hole* (*standard coffee bag feature) and the bottom of the bag burst and covered my front with Pistachio Gelato Coffee, the world's stinkiest and weirdest coffee
it turns out that 0.25 milligrams of melatonin has been enough not only to put me to sleep at night but also to keep me feeling super drowsy until around 3pm the next day, completely negating its intended purpose
if i took a 10mg pill i'd probably just not wake up
electricity that escapes and makes bolts is kiki. electromagnetic waves in general is bouba. it's like how light is both a particle and a ray. hope this helps
it's only because i'm an adult and we live in an oppressive society that i'm not allowed to hang out in the spacious area beneath my work desk during break time
you think you know the sidewalk from walking on it, but really you don't know the sidewalk until you try to ride a bike on it. i just remembered you're not supposed to do that though. i've lost my way in life
if you can cleanly peel the label off your prescription bottle, you should be able to bring it back to the pharmacy for reuse. there was only clean dry stuff in here to begin with. but noo we have to put them in the recycle bin to landfill pipeline
if you were getting your blood drawn and it freaked you out so bad that you fainted in the middle of it... wouldn't it be nice if the phlebotomist just took the blood while you were passed out? like, would you get mad at that? i think no one would. but that's not protocol. that's not allowed.
you can't just drop the phrase "OODA loop" in spoken conversation and not expect me to drop everything and ask why we're doodly dooing and deedly deeing all of a sudden
it is acceptable to call the popular hair style a "man bun." however, if you need to get the attention of a stranger with a man bun, it's rude to yell, "hey, man bun!" instead, try "hey, bun man!"
i want to move somewhere out of the rural rust belt bc it's depressing but yesterday i drove past a bunch of bougie-ass neighborhoods and that disgusted me. is there like a place that's normal
saw a car with headlights so scary i felt like i was in a junji ito story as it drove up behind me. trying desperately to recall details to make this post worth reading but i dunno they were SCARY man they made a SCARY FACE. picture headlights but if they were scary
