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Jake Slocum: It's weird, right?

@jakewrites.bsky.social

72 followers 46 following 380 posts

Lumberjack| Farmer| Comedian| Writer - formerly Creepshow: The Game, Dread Central, Syfy Portal, Cracked, others.

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Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 19d

Currently being lifted up by a weird heavenly beam and I hear...harps? Well I'm gonna hit "post" and drop my phone.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 24d

Don't buy games from shitty companies. Seems like a lot of folks don't understand that and keep doing it, expecting the shit company to become better. That never happens.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 25d

Crazy that two dudes named Scatman were alive *and* famous at the same time.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 25d

Unfortunately gotta go clean up my feed because it's like walking through an open air market.

"BUY MY BOOK"
"BUY MY GAME"
"BUY MY COURSE"
"BUY MY EXPERIENCE"
"BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY"

It's disgusting. When did every single place on the Internet get like this?

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 26d

There is nothing scarier than hearing an unfamiliar sound in the woods you've lived in your whole life.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 28d

MTV's Fear

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 28d

Didn't have "new McCarthyism" on my bingo card.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 28d

Wish the grasshoppers would FUCK OFF but at least they're getting close to turning and in turn being harvested.

Got probably 15 at this stage currently. Psyched.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 29d

A Boston porno version of Something Wicked This Way Comes called 'Wicked Cums'.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · 29d

I'd post more but my pumpkins are coming in really well this year

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 12

Is Andy from Toy Story named as an homage to Andy Barclay from Child's Play, who also had a toy that came to life?

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 11

Sometimes the tech hell future is kinda funny

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 10

...there's still time *I look behind me and the pages on my calendar begin flying off comically*

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 10

Occasionally, in the small hours, I see something move just out of the reach of the light from the dim bedside table.

It's probably nothing.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 10

Bring back the Jeremy Renner app

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Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 8

Lol my Google Memories thing is showing me pics of all the stuff I photographed to list on eBay last year to make ends meet.

Thanks Google.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 8

It's a certified banger.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 6

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Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 5

You should see what the president is doing. Just blast your eyes and brain 24/7 with the adventures of the worst old man.

You can't do anything about it, but it will also make you feel bad.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 4

Wasn't fast enough to get a picture but just saw the essence of modern Oklahoma: A teen girl riding a horse down the road looking at her phone.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 4

a black and white sign that says tales from the darkside on it .

ALT: a black and white sign that says tales from the darkside on it .

media.tenor.com

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 4

Truly raised by an algorithm, their morals are based on YouTube shorts content guidelines.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Sep 1

Keep getting ai ads for some self-published novel.

Lol get fucked I hope that shit craters.

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Aug 29

The Age of Heroes never happened in our universe

Jake Slocum: It's weird, right? @jakewrites.bsky.social · Aug 28

*in gravel voice* these mitochondrial terrorists burnt down the whole opera house!