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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 23

The fact that it’s a Murdoch paper that’s printing all these leaks makes it all especially delicious.

Is it all a set-up to get Vance in there? Maybe, but I don’t care.

Vance might be as bad as Trump, but I’m a petty bitch and I’ve been waiting TEN YEARS for karma to show up.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 22

My 9yo is in Tier 3 camp, which is a program for advanced students.

My 14yo is a counselor.

One of her classes is “Broadway” & the 14yo told me the 9yo’s project is a musical about women’s suffrage.

I just can’t believe my genetics contributed *anything* to these amazing kids.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 19

My wife made soup today and seasoned it with herbs she grew in her garden.

I made the unfortunate mistake of complimenting this as “being WAY more tasty than usual.”

I hope you’ll respect my family’s privacy as we take a step back from public life and try to heal from this.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 18

I will be suing my high school yearbook editors for not giving me “class clown” for senior superlatives in 1994.

Inspired by Donald Trump’s very sane and not at all crazy lawsuit against The Wall Street Journal, I am seeking eleventy-nine sextillion Spanish gold doubloons.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 18

MAGA, who do you think “made up” the Trump card?

Like, if you were making up evidence, wouldn’t it be a photoshopped picture or some doctored emails?

Do you think some WSJ editor said “WHAT IF WE MAKE UP A NAKED WOMAN BIRTHDAY CARD WITH WEIRD, OBLIQUE DIALOGUE IN THE CENTER?!”

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 18

Can’t believe the Wall Street Journal released video of Donald Trump and Jeffrey Epstein snuggling with each other at a Coldplay concert.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 18

MAGA,

Hi, it’s me, your good pal, internationally-beloved comedian Jay Black.

This is, like, your 257,000th offramp. But, it might be your last one.

From this point forward, it’s either take down the Trump-as-Rambo poster or defend a pedophile.

Up to you, clock is ticking.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 18

The birthday card from hell, that’s what people are calling it, proves two things.

One that Donald Trump and Jeffrey Epstein had exactly the kind of relationship we thought they did.

And two, Donald Trump writes the worst dialogue I’ve ever seen. And I write *Lifetime* movies.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 17

Just watched the Twilight series with my 14yo daughter.

It’s *shocking* to me that Kristen Stewart, a very fine actress, was lambasted for her choices playing Bella, while the guy playing Jacob got a pass.

That dude had abs and only ONE emotion, which was “Huh?”

#TeamEdward

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 15

This is the “I coulda gone to Harvard if I actually tried in school” of dating takes.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 15

If you like multiples of 5, my instagram page is a thing of beauty right now.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 15

“If there was anything incriminating on the Epstein List, the democrats would have released it!”

Cool, since there’s nothing incriminating on the list, so you should NO PROBLEM releasing it, right?

Right?!?

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 14

South Jersey Magazine.

www.southjerseymagazine.com

SouthJerseyMagazine.com

South Jersey Magazine is the premier publication in Southern NJ. South Jersey Magazine attracts an upscale readership thanks to its local editorial focus on varying topics ranging from arts and cultur...

www.southjerseymagazine.com

Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 14

MAGA accounts all agreeing with each other in unison always feels like Arnold Cunningham from “Book of Mormon” trying hard to sell Elder Price’s sermon. “The Bible is actually a trilogy and the Book of Mormon is Return of the Jedi? I’M interested!”

Shocking how many fall for it.

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Jay Black @jayblack.bsky.social · Jul 13

For the last year, I’ve been writing a column for a magazine.

It just occurred to me that, aside from a couple of reader I know in real life, I don’t know what anybody thinks about my column.

And I LOVE that. Maybe allowing everyone to give immediate feedback was a mistake.

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