Author | Lightnews

James is here too

@jcjmorris.bsky.social

140 followers 30 following 920 posts

Optimistic, submissive, sertraline-powered, linguiststicky, penis-adjacent situation. Never knowingly hinged

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James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 14h

"you appear to be having trouble processing negative emotions. You need a good cry. Here's some tickets to Madame Butterfly..." 🦋💔

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James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 1d

Ah yes, the ol' Shits n Giggles ploy...

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 1d

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 3d

In professor world, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 4d

PRRR PRRR PRRR

Bela Lugosheen @auden.bsky.social · 4d

this hole was made for me!

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 4d

Cabin in the Woods covers most of the bases, surely?

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 6d

a cartoon says well that 's enough on the bottom right

Alt: a cartoon says "well that's enough" on the bottom right. It's taken from Over The Garden Wall, which is a wonderful series, exceedingly binge-able every October, sometimes makes me cry, and has many parallels with Dante's Inferno

media.tenor.com

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 7d

Ah yes, the old 'is it COVID or am I just in my 40s?' quandary...

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 7d

Is it weird if I'm... y'know... into this just a little bit?

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James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 7d

"Sector A secure..."

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 7d

Or prison populations

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 7d

I have wrongfully detained the cats this morning, and this is their gentle reminder of the principles laid down in UK law.

"Yeah, habeas corpus, m[elon]f[arm]er"

A hand with an inch-long gash down the side, delivered by an angry cat's righteous hind leg as I wrestled said cat into the carrier to go to the vets

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 7d

After 20+ years teaching English to foreign types, this is one gaffe that never gets old. The other one, slightly more common, is 'my favourite drink is cock'

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 8d

My ex who trained as midwife now calls a speculum a 'flapjack', and honestly there are few funnier things in the world than this right now

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James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 8d

"Sir, you are naught but a scurrilous hole-heckler! Away with you!"
Yep, that checks out

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 8d

It is right to give her fuss and praise

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 8d

Qu'est-ce c'est, cette chôtinage!

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 8d

All British people should have to integrate. It's a two-way street ↔️

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 8d

Greenwich Spiteful Time
Greenwich Cruel and Unusual Time

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 9d

I'm still holding out for LOTR Extended Trilogy, everyone is Muppets except Peter Jackson

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 10d

I suggest pairing this stupid joke with one of mine:
Audible: "This is Audible..."
Me: "Yes, yes it is"

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 11d

Ugh, why are men?

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 12d

It's the ladylike little hand at the end to get help down from the stage that slays me... *am ded*
Also, everything this woman says and does... 🤩😍🤩😍🤩

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 12d

I am very happy for the UK to become poorer overall, as long as the wealth that remains is more evenly distributed

James is here too @jcjmorris.bsky.social · 12d

Plagiarism is definitely something to be avoided, especially when taking a stool sample.

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