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Mitten d'Amour

@mittendamour.bsky.social

2.2K followers 290 following 1.7K posts

I once bought a cold drink for a tramp on a hot day - turns out he wasn’t a secret millionaire; total fucking waste of 80p. (She/her)

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 23h

Fuck my ACTUAL fucking life. Gonna save Mort the bother and piss on all the furniture myself.

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 1d

I found where a kind person had set up hutches for the strays and took them treats.

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 1d

There is one big attraction missing from my round up. Here’s why.

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 1d

You don’t watch the video, did you.

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 1d

Check out my Gozo adventure in under a minute. I am very tired now.

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 2d

🤣

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 3d

I’ve come to a seafood restaurant where enquiring about the ‘fish of the day’ involves speed dating.

David, likes his women how he likes his coffee; wet. Linda, works in off-shore accounting, serious about yoga.

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Me: I don’t like pink wine, I never drink pink wine
Also me a having-calculated-my-luggage-allowance later:

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

The photo looked shit.

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Painterly smears of delicate clouds catch the last of the Gozo sun, glowing unearthly orange-tinged pink against mellow lavender, like the stain of a cheap ice lolly bleeding into an antique velvet pillow. The lighthouse intrudes, starkly chalk white atop its golden hill.

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

‪Not gonna stop me going ham on the homemade sun-dried tomato ‘pate’ tho, fucker. ‬

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

‪Dude told me to slow down my cheese consumption. Sir! LET ME LIVE STOP OPPRESSING ME THIS IS AN ATTACK ON MY CIVIL LIBERTIES I WILL NOT STAND FOR I-oh, to go with the next wines yeah fair.‬

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Ha! Nah, they were putting it up. I think there’s a festival at the end of the week. Very jolly.

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Why?

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Big fan of these ‘taster’ portions. Another three to go after this.

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Category is… M’off wine tasting bitchez

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Ridiculous pointilist skin

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Gozo. You are a good’yn.

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Nonsense fairytale fucking ass village.

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

Look at the little hutches someone has made for the strays 🥹

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

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Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 4d

I like to think that at various points in time someone new at Twistees has said “shall we update the design of packaging” and there’s just a room of variously rotting corpses all clutching their taints by from where they got cunt-punted so hard.

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 5d

‪THANK 👏🏻 YOU 👏🏻‬

Mitten d'Amour @mittendamour.bsky.social · 5d

Name a more “me” mid-holiday supermarket shop, I’ll wait.