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Patrick Storck

@pstorck.bsky.social

840 followers 1K following 450 posts

Writer and other fun stuff. Baltimore based. Currently working on horror shorts in prose and comics on substack. Previously I’ve worked on all ages books (Muppets, Disney Princesses, Shrek, Madagascar, etc). Sci Fi is probably next.

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Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · 11d

Republicans don’t have enough gas money to drive off a cliff, and are blaming the democrats for not getting in the car and kicking in.

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Aug 30

They’re waiting to announce his death officially until St Peter finishes reading off his list of sins

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Aug 30

They’re waiting to announce his death officially until Stephen Miller stops having a Jeremy Piven style meltdown

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Aug 30

They’re waiting to announce his death officially until they notify the family, and nobody can find Eric’s number

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Aug 21

Trump suggests renaming the Kennedy Center the Trump Center. If this happens, it would be the performance space most frequently named in the Epstein report

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jul 31

If your 2025 bingo card had Pamela Anderson hooking up with Darkman, and preaching David Lynch from the Criterion closet, the font in that square must’ve been tiny.

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jul 10

My house is haunted by James Randi, but every time I get my camera out he hides. Cheap bastard!

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 29

I made the mistake of telling my fitness tracker my goals and now it keeps thinking I’m going to try

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Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 25

Media shocked that public didn’t overwhelmingly support media backed ladder grabbing centrist. Film at eleven.

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 15

The hot toy this Christmas is going to be a remote control squeaky tank

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 15

Someone left a KKK out in the rain

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Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 15

Holding Fyre Fest in DC this time didn’t help

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 14

Had an idea for a writing prompt. Play wordle or a similar game. Then take the words you used and figure out a situation that uses them all.

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 9

It’s weird seeing people now saying “this isn’t what I voted for,” because it’s what I voted against

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Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 8

The grammar of truth is at play right now. The government and press can truthfully say the LA protests escalated to violence. They will just leave out who escalated it if advancing the government’s position

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Jun 3

Things my cat does on catnip:

Sniff my eyebrows

Fight my box of Addams Family Cereal

Convince me we have a ghost

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · May 24

Lay down to take a nap. Mind wanders. Figure out the intentionally overcomplex structure for a script that’s been all loose ideas until now. Clotheslines strung, just need to start hanging all the gags on them and start smoothing out the bumps. After that nap.

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · May 21

After a long session of insomnia stretching I laid down and felt so relaxed I actually said “oh my gosh”

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · May 17

Trump in 2015: We’re gonna drain the swamp!

His health secretary in 2025: Swamp’s fine, jump on in!

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Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · May 5

When you wake up in the middle of the night with a weird taste in your mouth, but you don’t want to make too much noise with your electric toothbrush. But then you remember that if you don’t hit the button it’s still a toothbrush.

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · May 1

But a great example. I know people who might say they don’t know any Gaga until you play one, then another, then another, and they get it

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Apr 30

There’s always talk of one hit wonders, sometimes a novelty song and sometimes just far from their best work, a gateway single. But what about groups or artists who most people can name 5 or more songs even if they weren’t hits? Whattaya got?

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Apr 29

DJT is the worst parts of Lex Luthor and Booster Gold

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Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Apr 26

It’s weird when you go to scream into the void and you get there and it’s already screaming back everything you’re thinking.

Me too, void. Me too.

Patrick Storck @pstorck.bsky.social · Apr 11

If the SAVE act passes, married women may want to consider reverting back to their maiden names (where applicable) so it matches your birth certificate, so you retain the ability to vote.

If your husband refuses, consider divorce.