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Suburbanista

@suburbanista.bsky.social

460 followers 35 following 210 posts

News and views from the Parking Lot Prairie. This account is owned and operated by an individual, and is not affiliated with or influenced by any organization.

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · Aug 1

We’ve created this Bluesky starterpack so that our subscribers can track the organizations plotting to rob the people of DFW of our natural landscape of parking lots and six lane arterials.

Let us know if we missed any organizations from which the children should be protected.

go.bsky.app/VFvAdRE

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

It could happen to anyone.

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

Suburbanista is a firm believer in equality for women and all who wish to drive.

Women belong behind the wheel just as much as men do. Society can be truly free only when our highways and arterial roads include EVERYONE.

The gated community is a big, welcoming tent!

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

America's cities are struggling financially because of post-pandemic prayer shortfalls.

Those associating budget problems with the dedication of half a city's land to surface parking need to stop watching @nerd4cities.bsky.social propaganda and start praying for their city's infrastructure.

Alice Lastname @wortron.bsky.social · 1d

yes! thoughts alone just don't get the job done! you also need prayers!

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

Heaven is indeed a perfect, low-density suburb with no taxes and unlimited services.

But we owe it to our children to strive for this on earth, too. If everyone would simply pray for our streets, sidewalks, sewer lines, and water mains, they wouldn't need costly maintenance.

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

Agreed, but the obvious problem is that suburban residents would then live in constant fear of becoming billionaires or owning large companies. Taxes sound great, but have an ugly history of oppressing the most privileged among us.

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

If you can't see what Big Bicycle and Big Bus are peddling to America's youth, we can only pray for you.

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

This is a family platform and we're a family friendly media outlet. Watch your attitude or we'll add you to our Naughty Bluesky Users prayer list.

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

If you or someone you know is experiencing discrimination from people whose essential services you're threatening to cut, we want to tell your story.

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

There is no place for bigotry at Suburbanista. In fact, we are fierce advocates for members of the gated community against the bigotry of cyclists and public transit riders.

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

There is no place for bigotry at Suburbanista. In fact, we are fierce advocates for members of the gated community against the bigotry of cyclists and public transit riders.

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 1d

The diagram is flawed!

The people who made it intentionally included public transit agencies with services to be cut, when in reality, public transit funding is a piggy bank that can be broken into for rare emergencies like infrastructure maintenance, police funding, and public library operations.

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 2d

We completely understand why you'd feel that way, but our local governments need to step in and hire two police for every resident without raising taxes and while keeping the population density of Antarctica.

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 2d

Why isn't the Bible and Chili's enough? Raise your children as you wish, but these social media platforms need to keep pleasures of the flesh like bike lanes and public transit away from kids!!!

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 2d

🚨 PARENTAL WARNING 🚨

Multiple parent groups are finding this design showing up on their teens' phones and social media feeds. If you see this, TALK TO YOUR KIDS! Someone could be trying to get them to turn your neighborhood into the INNER CITY!

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 8d

"I don't care if he gets around just fine on the trolley. I don't care if he's an oil baron worth $30 billion in 2025 money. If he doesn't have a car, he's just clearly not even trying," Emily told Suburbanista via a collection of journals found in a crawlspace at Old City Park.

Photo of modern woman superimposed over 1900s Dallas street, captioned with "Dallas woman sent back in time 125 years reports 'abysmal' dating scene after not finding even one guy who owns a car"

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 12d

There's no need to make this political!

We need a big tent. The far right brings important ideas about city dwellers (like cyclists), and the communists bring the necessary experience for funding highways and other car infrastructure.

All car-centric ideas are welcome among our Subscribers.

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 12d

North Texas highway commuter Greg Johnson tells Suburbanista that he'll participate in #WeekWithoutDriving when he's dead.

"Sure, a city where driving isn't necessary sounds nice, but people forget that North Texas' roads take hundreds of us to a city like that every year. It's called Heaven."

Photo of man enjoying his life by eating fast food while going with the flow in gridlock traffic, captioned with "North Texas man glad this isn't his only existence, looks forward to making up years spent driving in afterlife"

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 13d

The kindness of our Subscribers never ceases to amaze us and warm our hearts!

Thankfully, there is no need to donate, as the Benson family has successfully sued the cyclist's estate for $5 million for emotional damages and "sentimental devaluation" of the car, which now has an aftermarket bumper. 💔

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 13d

We at Suburbanista are deeply saddened when anyone loses their lives on the road, but this cyclist has provided an unfortunate example of how arrogantly hogging the bike lane creates a safety issue for everyone.

We wish the driver's family peace and healing.

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 13d

Investigators say the deceased cyclist failed to make eye contact with the motorist who hit him from behind in the bike lane.

"The cyclist hit the car from the front, causing a major annoyance for the driver and hundreds of dollars in damage to the front bumper," a source told Suburbanista.

Photo of dented car bumper, superimposed with photo of motorist Chad Benson, who was inconvenienced when a cyclist failed to leap out of his way. Captioned with "Dallas cyclist posthumously charged with impeding traffic after failing to clear path for speeding motorist"

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 13d

Some amazing, festive options for North Texans from all over to drive to! 🍂

Carpooling is a great idea. A family of four shouldn't need more than two cars.

You can also help the environment by turning down the music on your 100 mile trip to the pumpkin patch, saving a few watt-hours for our Earth!

NCTCOG Transportation @nctcogtrans.bsky.social · 13d

October is the season for gathering with friends and family, exploring the outdoors, and soaking up all the autumn traditions.

Read how you can embrace fall traditions while being mindful of the environment in our latest post on Clean Air Corner: www.airnorthtexas.org/aq-resources...

Fall Fun: Pumpkin Patches, Outdoor Adventures, and Sustainable Celebrations

October is the season for gathering with friends and family, exploring the outdoors...

www.airnorthtexas.org

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 14d

I swear it's like some people have never read the parable of the broken window. Window repair puts food on tables!

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 14d

A #WeekWithoutDriving is a cruel and unprovoked boycott of Dallas' trauma surgeons, air quality analysts, and injury lawyers.

Do you want Jim Adler the Texas Hammer to have to go home to his wife and kids and tell them that there will be no food this week, and that they may even lose the house?

Dallas Area Transit Alliance @ridewithdata.org · 15d

Week Without Driving starts TODAY! Get involved here:
dallasweekwithoutdriving.org

#WeekWithoutDriving #WeekWithoutDrivingDallas

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Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 21d

Grandscape is walkable. NorthPark is walkable. We're building a drive-in walking simulator in Plano that will offer legacy cities.

Suburbanites just don't want to be forced into this alternative lifestyle. Imagine being stuck in gridlock traffic behind your neighbors on a dirty sidewalk. No thanks!

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 24d

We never lose hope in anyone.

Good suburban experiences transform lives. Your "transit queen" daughter needs to find the right drive-thru and experience a freshly resurfaced parking lot in a beautiful suburb.

Send her to North Texas and have her follow Suburbanista. We can still save her.

Suburbanista @suburbanista.bsky.social · 24d

Are the people in the buildings looking both ways and wearing reflective clothing? The only "issue" is people not building inclusive spaces for cars, then getting upset when they simply try to coexist with us.