Author | Lightnews

SurlyITJesus

@surlyitjesus.bsky.social

440 followers 190 following 5.1K posts

I drink, cook, play TTRPG'S and talk shit. It's what I do...with occasional deep and highly entertaining comments drizzled in. I volunteer at New Leash Rescue. Adopt don't shop. "The best part of livin' is almost dyin'." I'm also a shitlib (apparently).

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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 1h

I just saw a video where the creator stated with his full chest that the Spider friends could beat the Bat Family with 3 hours prep.

NO THE FUCK THEY CAN'T!!!

Batman beat both Darkseid AND Superman. He is not losing to Any of the spider friends. That's not even bringing up Nightwing or Red Hood.

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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 1h

I haven't spoken to my immediate family in about 20 years, so it's surreal when I meet people that know my brother or any of his kids.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 19h

What the actual fuck???

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 1d

I swear to God... The stupid is just compounding. At least it just TX taxpayer money being used for this.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 1d

People that don't eat grits are not to be trusted.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 1d

They really need a new category for interceptions that are due to the receiver. Even if they attribute it to the receiver.... because that pick was not Mariotta's fault.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 2d

@aoc.bsky.social - please speed up time so that you are 35 soon.

America needs you.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 2d

I think of this song almost weekly. Especially the line"this is my world, you're just a squirrel trying to get a nut."

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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 2d

Bungo Stray Dogs just dropped the line!!

"There's nothing more dangerous than a mediocre man, with nothing to lose."

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 2d

You got me lifting holy hands...PREACH IT!!

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 3d

Omg.. someone help me. I am reading the Costco booklet they send you in the mail ..I saw something that looked interesting and I tapped on the picture.

I tapped on a picture, on physical paper.

On.
Physical.
Paper.

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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 3d

a man in a suit and tie says that he is not super prepared

ALT: a man in a suit and tie says that he is not super prepared

media.tenor.com

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 3d

MHA is killing it in the final season.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 3d

Say bruh, that's a name I haven't heard in a minute. Her CD, Good Girl Gone Bad, was the soundtrack to one of the weirdest nights of my life.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 3d

OR...a lot of money to buy the right people.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 3d

This is how I know Billionaires ain't worth shit. One of them MF'ers could have bank rolled Big Trouble in Little China 2.

Imagine, Kurt Russel's kid, Donny Yuen, Jon Cho, Andrew Koji...man, there hasn't been this many great Asian actors in a minute.

Instead we got the Joker 2.

Bitches.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 3d

This is the way.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 4d

Big trouble in little china.

Not even a second thought for me.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 4d

This just in....women do not appreciate yelling "SWEET MARTHA'S COOKIES!!" When you cum.

I thought it was clever.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 4d

Maaan...all skinfolk ain't kinfolk

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 4d

Snickers are the fully evolved form of a Three Musketeers bar.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 4d

I'm so happy the #Kingdom anime is back. So freaking fun...it gets me hyped!

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 4d

Those who work forces, are the same that burn crosses.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 4d

Pluto TV will honestly air any commercial. Anything...as long as they get paid. I just saw an AI video that looks like it was made on some bullshit site, trying to scam seniors out of their Medicare/Medicaid benefits.

SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 4d

Daaaamn girl...go on with ya bad self!!