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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 9d

OH GREAT, NOW IM BEING TARGETED BY A LIGHT SHOW!! THIS IS AN OVERREACTION AND ALSO ENTIRELY DESERVED.

FINE, SHOOT ME, PULL THE TRIGGER!!! PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY SO I CAN FINALLY SLEEP.

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 9d

OKAY???? AND?? DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DENY IT OR SOMETHING???? QUIT POINTING OUT THE OBVIOUS I'M BUSY HAVING A BREAKDOWN OVER MY SLEEPING SCHEDULE!!!!

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 13d

I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE WANTED TO DIE MORE THAN I DO RIGHT FREAKING NOW!!!

DELETE THIS! DELETE THE WHOLE APP!!! DELETE THE INTERNET!!! DELETE YOUR PHONE INFO!!! DELETE YOURSELF !!! (I MEAN THAT LOVINGLY)

WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS?!?!
ACTUALLY ANSWER.
HONESTLY.
SCIENTIFICALLY.

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 13d

SINCE WHEN ARE YOU THE EXPERT ON WRIGGLER TROLL HYBRIDS?!

[Karkat holds up his arm, the cuff on his wrist covered in bite marks/dents] >:[

2ollux Captor [tA] is IDLE @twiinarmageddon.bsky.social · 13d

ii mean 2ure.
you really thiink that 2he would do that two eii though?

> You purposefully ask this, because obviously Iffy is the favored guardian if KK thinks he's going to get eaten. But if he was eaten, Iffy would be upset.

COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 13d

SOLLUX MAY I REMIND YOU THAT SOMETHING DOES NOT NECESSARILY HAVE TO BE BIGGER OR SMALLER THAN YOU IN ORDER TO RIP A THROAT OUT AND / OR CAUSE BODILY HARM?!

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 13d

WHY ARE YOU ENCOURAGING THIS
SHES GOING TO GET SICK
THATS SOMEONE'S PET
I HAVE TO PAY FOR THIS
I AM LOSING MY MIND

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 13d

SOLLUX MAY I REMIND YOU THAT SOMETHING DOES NOT NECESSARILY HAVE TO BE BIGGER OR SMALLER THAN YOU IN ORDER TO RIP A THROAT OUT AND / OR CAUSE BODILY HARM?!

2ollux Captor [tA] is IDLE @twiinarmageddon.bsky.social · 13d

and look at you, youre a giiant.
do you really thiink 2he2 goiing two get biig enough two eat you?
beecau2e ii dont thiink 2o.

unle22 you plan two 2tart 2hriinkiing a2 you get old or whatever 2tupiid non2en2e.

COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 13d

YEAH, FOR NOW
SHES GOING TO WORK HER WAY UP TO IT, OBVIOUSLY. LOOK AT HER. SHE KEEPS BITING EVERYTHING >:[

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 13d

YEAH, FOR NOW
SHES GOING TO WORK HER WAY UP TO IT, OBVIOUSLY. LOOK AT HER. SHE KEEPS BITING EVERYTHING >:[

2ollux Captor [tA] is IDLE @twiinarmageddon.bsky.social · 14d

you are exaggeratiing a liittle ii thiink.

2he ii2 obviiou2ly way two 2mall two eat you.

COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 14d

STOP! FULL STOP!!! THIS IS NOT FUNNY. THIS IS EVIDENCE OF A HORRIFIC EVENT UNFOLDING RIGHT NOW!!!!

MY WRIGGLER IS DEVOURING PETS!!

THIS IS HOW IT STARTS!!! FIRST IT’S A GOLDFISH, NEXT IT’S THE FAMILY BARKBEAST, AND THEN IT’S ME!!!

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 14d

SPIT IT OUT, ARIYAH!!! SPIT. IT. OUT. WE DO NOT EAT AQUATIC LIFE UNLESS IT IS NOT A PET, PROPERLY PREPARED AND SEASONED!!!

THIS IS WHY TROLLS DON'T DO THE WHOLE "PARENTING" BIT!!!

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 14d

STOP! FULL STOP!!! THIS IS NOT FUNNY. THIS IS EVIDENCE OF A HORRIFIC EVENT UNFOLDING RIGHT NOW!!!!

MY WRIGGLER IS DEVOURING PETS!!

THIS IS HOW IT STARTS!!! FIRST IT’S A GOLDFISH, NEXT IT’S THE FAMILY BARKBEAST, AND THEN IT’S ME!!!

enigmaticIdolizer [EI] @iffywoofs.bsky.social · 14d

[meanwhile in a random aquarium..........]

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

//)hELLLP OMG 😭😭😭😭

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

OH FUCK YOU CAPTOR, SHE WASN’T “LOST” UNTIL IFREYA GOT INVOLVED. I’M HANDLING IT. EVERYONE ELSE CAN STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY BECAUSE YOU GUYS ARE /NOT/ HELPFUL!!!

2ollux Captor [tA] is IDLE @twiinarmageddon.bsky.social · 16d

nevermiind he ii2nt that re2pon2iible.

he lo2t a baby apparently.

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

NO. NO HEROICS. NO “STEP ASIDE, I GOT THIS.” BULLSHIT.

YOU DON’T GOT THIS. SHE’S A VANTAS. SHE’S MY RESPONSIBILITY. STAY BACK AND LET ME HANDLE IT!! [Karkat is about to have a fucking aneurysm]

❣️💥undyingMistakes🗡️✨ @mistakecollective.bsky.social · 16d

HM
CUTE, SHARP TEETH N LIKES VIOLENCE HUH
MOVE ASIDE AMATEURS I GOT THIS 💥

COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU LOST HER?! SHE'S LIKE A FOOT AND A HALF TALL AND DOESN'T STOP SCREAMING- HOW THE FUCK DO YOU LOSE HER!?!?

NOBODY MOVE. THE SMALL ONE IS LOOSE!!! SHE HAS SHARP TEETH. SHE IS NOT AFRAID TO USE THEM!! IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE, THEN DO NOT APPROACH THE TINY PINK TROLL!!!

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU LOST HER?! SHE'S LIKE A FOOT AND A HALF TALL AND DOESN'T STOP SCREAMING- HOW THE FUCK DO YOU LOSE HER!?!?

NOBODY MOVE. THE SMALL ONE IS LOOSE!!! SHE HAS SHARP TEETH. SHE IS NOT AFRAID TO USE THEM!! IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE, THEN DO NOT APPROACH THE TINY PINK TROLL!!!

enigmaticIdolizer [EI] @iffywoofs.bsky.social · 16d

KAaARKAaAT I LOST THE BAaABY

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

[ Karkat lights the fire, thrusts a couple sticks and skewers at Gamzee, and glares]

THERE. IT’S LIT. YOU HAVE YOUR TOOLS. NOW TRY NOT TO TORCH YOUR FACE OFF LIKE THE SUGAR OBSESSED JACKASS YOU ARE.

AND YOU @mistakecollective.bsky.social BEHAVE

Gamzee Makara @mfnmiracles.bsky.social · 16d

[ Gamzee chuckled, unphased by KK’s little rant about clowns. He looked at the fire pit and he pulled out his bag of marshmallows. ]

Aw, KaRbRo Is GoNnA mAkE uS wIcKeD mOtHeRfUckInG S’mOrEs! :o)

(( Hellooooo~!))

COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

[Karkat lures Gamzee to a proper fire pit. He is already stacking wood into it, muttering about how he’s going to die surrounded by idiots with sugar addictions and no critical thinking skills]

STUPID. FUCKING. CLOWNS.

(anyways guys meet my good friend :3)

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

SHUT THE F****** AND EAT THE STUPID SUGAR TREATS THE CORRECT WAY YOU LITTLE GOBLIN

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

ABSOLUTELY THE F*** NOT

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

[Karkat lures Gamzee to a proper fire pit. He is already stacking wood into it, muttering about how he’s going to die surrounded by idiots with sugar addictions and no critical thinking skills]

STUPID. FUCKING. CLOWNS.

(anyways guys meet my good friend :3)

Gamzee Makara @mfnmiracles.bsky.social · 16d

[ The clown was happy his friend was just merely protecting him but also sad a little. ]

bUt It WaS uNsCeNtEd… hUmAnS sAy iTs SaFe! :o(

hOnK :o)

[ he was going to follow Karkat anyway for a proper smores ]

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

I WILL NOT BE LETTING HIM EAT THE TOXIC FUME ENCASED SUGAR SLOP. SORRY NOT SORRY.

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT’S IN A CANDLE? IT'S A FUCKING CHEMICAL COCKTAIL GAMZEE. YOU'RE NOT EATING THIS.

NOW COME THE FUCK ON SO WE CAN MAKE YOUR DUMBASS A PROPER FIRE FOR YOUR STUPID SUGAR SNACKS

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

SHUT THE FUCK UP HE IS NOT EATING IT [KARKAT AGGRESSIVELY SNATCHES THE MARSHMALLOW FROM GAMZEE]

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 16d

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 17d

[AGGRESSIVELY TAPPING THE POST FOR ANYONE THINKING IM "TOO MEAN" TO IFREYA]

COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · May 5

"Karkat be nice to Iffy-"

OKAY, LISTEN UP, BECAUSE APPARENTLY SOME OF YOU NEED THIS INFORMATION SPELLED OUT N FRONT OF YOU.

TROLL RELATIONSHIPS AREN’T ALL SUNSHINE AND MUTUAL MEDITATION. WE’RE BIOLOGICALLY AND CULTURALLY PRIMED FOR CONFRONTATIONAL BONDING. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?!

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 17d

METAL ANTS. BECAUSE APPARENTLY REGULAR ANTS WEREN’T ENOUGH OF A PESTILENCE, NOW THEY HAVE TO BE HUGE AND BULLETPROOF TOO. FUCK THIS.

ALSO WHY ARE YOU WRITING ME LIKE THIS WITH THREATS OF PARTY HATS?!

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 17d

WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU 𝗧𝗥𝗬𝗜𝗡𝗚 TO MAKE ME JEALOUS?! WHY DO YOU DO THINGS JUST TO GET A RISE OUT OF ME?!?!

HAVE FUN WITH YOUR LOW QUALITY HUMAN SLOP GAME !!!

2ollux Captor [tA] is IDLE @twiinarmageddon.bsky.social · 17d

2he a2k2 you fiir2t beecau2e 2he loooove2 you and want2 two do actiiviitiie2 wiith you.

but iit2 fiine iif you want two bee dumb and turn her down beecau2e ii wiill bee here two 2woop iin and help her make you jealou2 or whatever.

but anyway ii diid ju2t want two try that game out.

COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 17d

EXCUSE THE FUCK OUT OF ME?!

SHE ASKED ME FIRST. SHE ALWAYS ASKS ME FIRST!!

AND THEN YOU GUYS HAVE THE AUDACITY TO SIT THERE AND OPENLY TALK ABOUT MAKING ME JEALOUS LIKE ASSHOLES?! 💢

WELL GUESS WHAT? I AM. CONGRATULATIONS, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

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COMMANDER KARKAT @vantasspeaks.bsky.social · 17d

EXCUSE THE FUCK OUT OF ME?!

SHE ASKED ME FIRST. SHE ALWAYS ASKS ME FIRST!!

AND THEN YOU GUYS HAVE THE AUDACITY TO SIT THERE AND OPENLY TALK ABOUT MAKING ME JEALOUS LIKE ASSHOLES?! 💢

WELL GUESS WHAT? I AM. CONGRATULATIONS, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

2ollux Captor [tA] is IDLE @twiinarmageddon.bsky.social · 17d

iill play wiith you iif you want eii.

we wiill have 2o much fun and kk wiill bee jealou2 and wiill want two joiin you next tiime probably.

enigmaticIdolizer [EI] @iffywoofs.bsky.social · 17d

KAaARKAaAT won't plaAay aAamong us with me 😡

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