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amiigat.bsky.social
@amiigat.bsky.social
· Nov 11
When you see your old Twitter friends have finally joined Bluesky:
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I told my husband I was tired and he said, “You’re always tired.” Sir, that is correct. And thank you for your contribution.
December 6, 2025 at 7:38 PM
I told my husband I was tired and he said, “You’re always tired.” Sir, that is correct. And thank you for your contribution.
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What wine pairs well with shut the fuck up?
December 6, 2025 at 10:08 PM
What wine pairs well with shut the fuck up?
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The bigger the boobs the funnier the skeets or whatever.
March 18, 2025 at 10:18 PM
The bigger the boobs the funnier the skeets or whatever.
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Don't talk to me while I'm listening.
December 6, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Don't talk to me while I'm listening.
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I don’t care about follower count, I just want people to repost my stupid jokes.
December 6, 2025 at 4:56 PM
I don’t care about follower count, I just want people to repost my stupid jokes.
Reposted by amiigat.bsky.social
On the way to pick up my son’s friends for their first chess tournament, I was instructed not to tell any jokes. To cope, I’m only saying serious things but following it up with, “and that’s no joke.” It’s the ultimate loophole.
December 6, 2025 at 5:00 PM
On the way to pick up my son’s friends for their first chess tournament, I was instructed not to tell any jokes. To cope, I’m only saying serious things but following it up with, “and that’s no joke.” It’s the ultimate loophole.
Reposted by amiigat.bsky.social
"Say it!"
"No!"
"Say it, Hans."
"My name's not Hans!"
"I WILL drop you."
“Fine, okay, you win!”
“I need to hear you say it.”
"Die Hard is a Christmas movie!"
"No!"
"Say it, Hans."
"My name's not Hans!"
"I WILL drop you."
“Fine, okay, you win!”
“I need to hear you say it.”
"Die Hard is a Christmas movie!"
December 6, 2025 at 4:37 PM
"Say it!"
"No!"
"Say it, Hans."
"My name's not Hans!"
"I WILL drop you."
“Fine, okay, you win!”
“I need to hear you say it.”
"Die Hard is a Christmas movie!"
"No!"
"Say it, Hans."
"My name's not Hans!"
"I WILL drop you."
“Fine, okay, you win!”
“I need to hear you say it.”
"Die Hard is a Christmas movie!"
Reposted by amiigat.bsky.social
How can we be soulmates if you don’t repost my stupid jokes?
December 6, 2025 at 5:16 PM
How can we be soulmates if you don’t repost my stupid jokes?
Reposted by amiigat.bsky.social
"You're lucky Mom says I can't open my presents until Christmas."
"But I'm not-"
"Tick tock, motherfucker."
"But I'm not-"
"Tick tock, motherfucker."
December 6, 2025 at 2:17 PM
"You're lucky Mom says I can't open my presents until Christmas."
"But I'm not-"
"Tick tock, motherfucker."
"But I'm not-"
"Tick tock, motherfucker."
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Woke up an attention whore again.
December 6, 2025 at 3:34 PM
Woke up an attention whore again.
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Head of lettuce sounds like a big responsibility.
December 6, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Head of lettuce sounds like a big responsibility.
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I have nothing in common with unattractive people.
December 6, 2025 at 3:50 PM
I have nothing in common with unattractive people.
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I’m only here for the attractive people like me.
December 6, 2025 at 4:12 PM
I’m only here for the attractive people like me.
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When someone has “taken” in their bio, they got abducted by aliens.
December 5, 2025 at 9:15 PM
When someone has “taken” in their bio, they got abducted by aliens.
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Being alive right now is trying to balance “I want to stay informed” with “this is actively destroying my mental health”
December 5, 2025 at 9:28 PM
Being alive right now is trying to balance “I want to stay informed” with “this is actively destroying my mental health”
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She’s a 10 but she’s an attention whore.
December 5, 2025 at 8:35 PM
She’s a 10 but she’s an attention whore.
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who is going to tell skittles that rainbows are water so we’ve all tasted the rainbow.
December 5, 2025 at 8:19 PM
who is going to tell skittles that rainbows are water so we’ve all tasted the rainbow.
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i found a sweater at the mall that i really want to get for my dad but the guy wearing it is being a total dick
December 5, 2025 at 1:55 PM
i found a sweater at the mall that i really want to get for my dad but the guy wearing it is being a total dick
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Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting the Spanish Inquisition.
December 5, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting the Spanish Inquisition.
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My 4 year old came downstairs and asked me what his stuffed bunny did for a living. Over the next few minutes I guessed farmer, fireman, astronaut and race car driver until my son deadpanned, "he doesn't have a job because he's not real," while glaring at me like I'm an idiot.
December 5, 2025 at 6:30 PM
My 4 year old came downstairs and asked me what his stuffed bunny did for a living. Over the next few minutes I guessed farmer, fireman, astronaut and race car driver until my son deadpanned, "he doesn't have a job because he's not real," while glaring at me like I'm an idiot.
Reposted by amiigat.bsky.social
I wasn't allowed to watch "A Charlie Brown Christmas" as a kid because of my Peanut allergy.
December 5, 2025 at 6:30 PM
I wasn't allowed to watch "A Charlie Brown Christmas" as a kid because of my Peanut allergy.
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"I like standing up and saying things."
December 5, 2025 at 6:40 PM
"I like standing up and saying things."