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notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented
@notinvented.bsky.social
110 followers 50 following 900 posts
Professional IT nerd, amateur photographer, shining wit. Once managed to get 2 answers right in Only Connect but it made my brain hurt for days. I will block or play with any suspected non human interlocutors.
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notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 13h
Perhaps he's scared of vampires.
2
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 13h
A bird in the hand is worth 2 if you're bushed.
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 21h
Only $1000 on a dac amp combo?
Cheap junk!
1 1
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 22h
Memo to Air Traffic Controllers:

Check all inbound aircraft for spare food.

Prioritise planes with spare hot food, then sandwiches. Immediately distribute to airport staff who haven't eaten today.

Non-food aircraft agree to pay an extra $500 in cash upon landing, or get directed into terrain.
1
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 1d
Drain the swamp!
;)
1 10
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 1d
We need to stop the riots in Portland spreading to nearby cities, such as Starboardland, Aftland and Bowland.

I am therefore banning not just Antifa, but Antidoh, Antirey and Antimi. And any other terrorist organisations created by Julie Andrews.
4 9 140
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 1d
Thx - I enjoyed that.
:)
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 1d
Heard it this morning, it was a great topic discussed well, and it sounded like two old friends allowing us to listen in to them chatting over coffee.

(Although I did have to look up who Cicero was because I'm an uneducated, uninformed, unenlightened ignoramus).
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notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 1d
I wonder if Nick Clegg, former British political leader of the Liberal Democratic party, will feel the need to apologise at some point?

It wouldn't be the first time...

youtube.com/watch?v=KUDj...
The Nick Clegg Apology Song: I'm Sorry (The Autotune Remix)
YouTube video by The Poke
youtube.com
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 1d
Great pictures!

I love the composition of the black and white squares / framed one, especially as the woman's clothes and pose perfectly match the artwork.
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 1d
You can't beat finding true love by doing it the old school way - filling in forms and recording yourself on video tape.

youtube.com/watch?v=TiAo...
Lily Linneker's Love Bureau | Bottom | BBC Comedy Greats
YouTube video by BBC Comedy Greats
youtube.com
1
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 2d
Imagine people who claim they are really into cars failing to recognise a speaker.
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 2d
My advice to Hank would be to film everything on greenscreen complete with tracking markers, and then it'd be much easier to add the dinosaurs and laser beams in post.

And don't forget a well spliced in b-roll of 'exploding volcano v5810' will really help keep your key demographic interested.
3
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 2d
Pronouncing the T in the London Underground rail network and calling it the "Tube", rather than Chewb.

There's proberly summat abaat it on YouChube if yer intrested, innit mate.
4
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 2d
Blue Peter parachute episode is mentioned in the paper - I think this (or at least that part of it) became famous as extracts in clip shows.

youtube.com/watch?v=-O3Y...
1973: JOHN NOAKES' Death-Defying Five-Mile FREEFALL | Blue Peter | BBC Archive
YouTube video by BBC Archive
youtube.com
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 2d
He missed his s.o.n.
2
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 2d
Had a chat with Old Ben (as he likes to be known) earlier. He was shitting bricks because finally he got to meet Mark Watson. Took him 4 hours to pick a shirt because he didn't want to get it wrong.... poor guy.
;)
1
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 2d
I bet they were really cross.
2
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 2d
Yeah but Leo was a funnier first name.
;)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jules_L...
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notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 3d
Ah yes, the famous "Trouble With Nibbles" episode.
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 3d
You literally can't have a cathedral without a cat.

(Although if you tried it'd be a hedral).
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 3d
Let's all give thanks to Mr Leo Tard, who teamed up with Jim Nastics, and after accidentally locking an athlete in a bank safe invented the Vault.
1 2
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 3d
The only Taxi that really gets tips.
3
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 3d
Get thrown around in a tiny metal tube thousands of feet up where you are belted into your seat and are scared you might not make it.

Or be forced to wait in a big stable building where you can walk around and have a choice of shops and restaurants.

Hmm. Tricky choice...
Do I get a parachute?
notinvented.bsky.social
Not Invented @notinvented.bsky.social · 3d
Because if they did they'd be in a string tritet which just sounds silly.