Seth Brown
banner
risingpun.bsky.social
Seth Brown
@risingpun.bsky.social
Freelance writer/humor columnist/sushi enthusiast

National Press Club's 2024 Angele Gingras Humor Award winner

My free semi-monthly newsletter has bad puns, jokes in parentheses, and very rarely, insightful commentary:

https://buttondown.email/RisingPun
Reposted by Seth Brown
Wondering why no one likes your posts anymore, even among your friends? It's because @jay.bsky.team and team have decided to hide a huge amount of content from all of our feeds by default.

Here's how to turn it off.

First go to the hamburger menu in the upper left corner
November 6, 2025 at 6:23 PM
Find the error in the sentence: "We should have shrimp scampi or pizza for dinner."

Answer: the word "or" is incorrect, and should be replaced with "on".

@starfishknits.bsky.social makes a damn fine shrimp scampi pizza.
November 6, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Money is dumb because I spent ten minutes talking myself out of spending $5 on a video game and then saw the 4-figure medical bill on my desk.
November 5, 2025 at 10:33 AM
Oh, Ozymandias, you're the one
Even though your reign's now done
Ozymandias, I'm awfully fond of you
(Bo bo bo de oh)
Ozymandias, King of Kings
Passions stamped on lifeless things
Ozymandias, your feet at least made it through
I heard there was a statue tall
That sneered at folk and commanded all
But you don't really care for symbols do ya
It goes like this the feet the fist
The head that fell the aim that missed
The long lost king whose name was Ozymandias
Ozymandias
Ozymandias
Ozymandias
Ozymaaaaandias
Once upon a desert sandy
As through winds the trav'ling man he
Spied the face of Ozymandy
Lying, simply lying there
Suddenly there was some writing
Pon the plinth that he was sighting
That the sand and time were blighting
Quoth the statue, "Now despair"
October 30, 2025 at 8:30 PM
The Halloween issue of my newsletter has all the stuff I forgot last newsletter, plus terrible vampire puns:

buttondown.com/RisingPun/ar...
[Seth Says] Forget-Me-Yep
Q: What do you call appetizers for Dracula?A: Vlad Tapas Okay, so it's a bit of an arcane reference (Jinx!), but most bad Halloween puns are all like,...
buttondown.com
October 30, 2025 at 6:14 AM
Reposted by Seth Brown
CBS News is dead.

A right-wing content mill is about to take its place.

Paramount deserves to hemorrhage money over this. Cancel Paramount+. Boycott their movies in theaters.

The political Right is waging a war on journalism and truth.

Kick them in the profits.
October 30, 2025 at 12:56 AM
Last-minute costume advice to turn that inflatable frog into something UNFROGGETTABLE:

www.berkshireeagle.com/opinion/colu...
The Pun Also Rises: Repurposed costume advice
Humorist Seth Brown offers a pun-filled guide to transforming overused Halloween costumes into clever, customized creations that are anything but scary-similar.
www.berkshireeagle.com
October 29, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Reposted by Seth Brown
GDrive > top right gear:

Manage Apps > uncheck Gemini
ALSO
Privacy > Manage Workspace smart feature settings > two Gemini settings, toggle off

(Gemini AI is on by default and it explicity scans and "shares" or "uses" your info and activity across Google products)
friend shared this, immediately updated my settings
October 27, 2025 at 8:36 PM
It's better to have Louvred and lost than never to have Louvred at all.
October 20, 2025 at 3:01 AM
Reposted by Seth Brown
Long COVID isn’t rare. It’s a complex, chronic condition affecting millions worldwide, often for months or years after infection. Our latest article breaks down 7 key facts everyone should know about long COVID — from how common it is, to why prevention still matters.

whn.global/seven-things...
October 18, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Phones are so high-tech today, it's hard to believe older basic computers took up a whole room -- that shit is Cray!
October 19, 2025 at 4:57 AM
Reposted by Seth Brown
The Declaration of Independence specifies 27 grievances with King George III and Britain.

Donald Trump and his regime have committed at least 20 of those same offenses highlighted in yellow.
#NoKings
October 18, 2025 at 2:47 PM
Reposted by Seth Brown
Hi, I'm the ProPublica reporter who's been tracking an unusual stat: U.S. citizens grabbed by immigration agents.

I did it because the government isn’t.

This is what I found.
October 18, 2025 at 2:11 PM
I may have burnt a pancake, but I've got an easy recipe for turnip greens and some tales of college stupidity:

buttondown.com/RisingPun/ar...
[Seth Says] Use It Or Lose It
Q: Why will lots of teachers be out and about on Saturday?A: Because teachers are pro-test. (I realize this joke is undercut slightly by the fact that many...
buttondown.com
October 18, 2025 at 9:17 AM
Reposted by Seth Brown
I suspect the MAGA government decided to launch all these Bluesky accounts tonight to try to bait people in advance of No Kings.

These people have incurable 4chan brain and this is how they operate.

Block them. Do not engage. Do not give them what they want.
October 17, 2025 at 11:15 PM
With Homecoming in a few weeks, I've been thinking of college memories. Here's some stories from back when I was young and foolish (as opposed to now, old and foolish) - the clown moment, the unloading zone, and the professor who refused to read my paper:

www.berkshireeagle.com/opinion/colu...
Tales from college
According to a reminder I recently received, next year is my 25th college reunion. Many people celebrate 25th reunions by returning to their college friends with stories of glorious accomplishments
www.berkshireeagle.com
October 17, 2025 at 5:11 PM
In honor of spooky month, share a 4 word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand

Client auto-accepted Grammarly suggestions
In honor of spooky month, share a 4 word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand

Patron re-shelved their books.
In honor of spooky month, share a 4 word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand

Sir Gilbert Scott restoration.
October 12, 2025 at 6:02 PM
Reposted by Seth Brown
Still think Antifa isn't violent? Here's bodycam footage of Antifa founder B.J. Blazkowicz shooting a heroic member of ICE who was just trying to protect this great nation. Thank God we have Blazkowicz's girlfriend in custody.
October 9, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Reposted by Seth Brown
Claim: 10 cars rammed ICE
Truth: No cars rammed ICE

Claim: She boxed ICE in
Truth: ICE boxed her in

Claim: She shot a rifle at ICE
Truth: She did not have a rifle

Claim: ICE returned fire
Truth: Only ICE fired

Claim: She drove herself to the hospital
Truth: Paramedics found her
October 6, 2025 at 10:49 PM
UBI isn't just a moral good, it's also economically sensible.

Meanwhile, if you're an artist in Massachusetts, you've got 3 weeks to get in your MCC grant applications.
Damn. This is amazing. £325 per week, paid monthly, for 3 years - and the result was a profit for the Irish economy:
www.citizensinformation.ie/en/employmen...
October 7, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Reposted by Seth Brown
Washington Post dismantled the platform Jamal wrote on. Discarded the fellowship they created in his memory.

They fired me unjustly for speaking the truth.

But I’ll never stop talking about my friend, writer, and amazing human, Jamal Khashoggi.

RIP, Jamal.

open.substack.com/pub/karenatt...
Jamal Khashoggi, the Washington Post, and the Cost of Speaking Out
As Saudi Arabia hosts comedians and courts gamers, the silenced voice of Jamal Khashoggi still echoes.
open.substack.com
October 2, 2025 at 7:02 PM
This week's column covers the miseries of grade school, RFK Jr.'s anti-autistic crusade, and the joys of living your best life.

If you think these issues deserve to be discussed more in-depth outside a humor column, you could always follow @audhd-psychnp.com

www.berkshireeagle.com/opinion/colu...
Revenge on the nerds
Unfortunately, some of those middle-school bullies haven't changed in the past few decades, but they have found their way into government.
www.berkshireeagle.com
October 2, 2025 at 4:49 PM
Reposted by Seth Brown
Just gonna keep tapping the sign*

*𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘋𝘦𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘐𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦
October 1, 2025 at 3:14 AM
ATTENTION SCI-FI READERS:

My friend Katie Saxon commissioned me to write some lyrics for a new song about all her favorite dystopian sci-fi we're living out.

Have a listen, and enjoy YouTube's closed captioning which will let you catch all the fast-paced lyrics:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=4n9B...
Dear Ursula (The Science Fiction Song)
YouTube video by Katherine Saxon
www.youtube.com
October 1, 2025 at 2:00 AM

S: (after almost burning myself on the oven) "Hey, did you know that ovens are hot?"

D: "Yes I did, because I went to Oven School."

S: "Very popular program, I'm led to believe. They have like 400 degrees."
September 29, 2025 at 4:02 AM