Betty Utility
@bettyutility.bsky.social
Getting on. Well, getting by. From the West Midlands. Now in London's least fashionable borough.
Calls for obesity tsar to step down. He's two stone bigger!!! Friends fear he's drinking CUSTARD again!!!
December 9, 2025 at 11:21 AM
Calls for obesity tsar to step down. He's two stone bigger!!! Friends fear he's drinking CUSTARD again!!!
"Women need fewer calories" is just a new version of the old "Women shouldn't drink alcohol because their tiny kidneys and livers can't cope with it. A small glass of sweet sherry should be the limit". Anyway, being in a restaurant with burly men will just give them the vapours.
December 9, 2025 at 7:20 AM
"Women need fewer calories" is just a new version of the old "Women shouldn't drink alcohol because their tiny kidneys and livers can't cope with it. A small glass of sweet sherry should be the limit". Anyway, being in a restaurant with burly men will just give them the vapours.
Some former EastEnders actress who was on I'm A Celebrity on television. She apparently has crippling social anxiety and wants to do a bit of everything now - TV presenting and "her music". Great career choices for someone who can't be around people, those.
a blonde woman is sitting in a kitchen with the words `` sure , jan . '' written on her face .
ALT: a blonde woman is sitting in a kitchen with the words `` sure , jan . '' written on her face .
media.tenor.com
December 8, 2025 at 10:51 AM
Some former EastEnders actress who was on I'm A Celebrity on television. She apparently has crippling social anxiety and wants to do a bit of everything now - TV presenting and "her music". Great career choices for someone who can't be around people, those.
M & S are putting a lot of faith into Cheese Twists. There is a Cheese Twist wall by the checkouts. They must be hoping this will be the snack eaten compulsively by nervous introverts on Christmas Day trying to avoid small talk so they end up being full to bursting before the meal.
December 7, 2025 at 7:08 PM
M & S are putting a lot of faith into Cheese Twists. There is a Cheese Twist wall by the checkouts. They must be hoping this will be the snack eaten compulsively by nervous introverts on Christmas Day trying to avoid small talk so they end up being full to bursting before the meal.
Reposted by Betty Utility
Martin Parr R.I.P. Such sad, sad news. He leaves behind him a magnificent body of work.
Mary Lynn Merkel, Gay Pride March, Atlanta, Georgia, 2010, by Mr Parr.
Mary Lynn Merkel, Gay Pride March, Atlanta, Georgia, 2010, by Mr Parr.
December 7, 2025 at 1:47 PM
Martin Parr R.I.P. Such sad, sad news. He leaves behind him a magnificent body of work.
Mary Lynn Merkel, Gay Pride March, Atlanta, Georgia, 2010, by Mr Parr.
Mary Lynn Merkel, Gay Pride March, Atlanta, Georgia, 2010, by Mr Parr.
Reposted by Betty Utility
Reposted by Betty Utility
One evening I passed not one, not two, not three, but four 'Ripper tours' on Mitre Square. I even overheard one of the guides saying Catherine Eddowes' was his 'favourite murder'. Fucking ghouls, the lot of them.
it’s not surprising that The Rest Is History have approached the murder of five women as a fun whodunnit, but it is still pretty grim
The historians focus on the knackermen, slaughtermen and butchers who worked around Whitechapel as they attempt to identify the serial killer
December 7, 2025 at 11:36 AM
One evening I passed not one, not two, not three, but four 'Ripper tours' on Mitre Square. I even overheard one of the guides saying Catherine Eddowes' was his 'favourite murder'. Fucking ghouls, the lot of them.
Reposted by Betty Utility
There's a pop up Christmas shop in the town centre where New Look used to be. In the centre of the front display is a huge Father Christmas that has a gammy leg, the result of combat in the Falklands.
December 7, 2025 at 12:20 PM
There's a pop up Christmas shop in the town centre where New Look used to be. In the centre of the front display is a huge Father Christmas that has a gammy leg, the result of combat in the Falklands.
Slept for two hours, cough (socialising into the early hours last night). Also didn't see the World Cup draw and feel as though I missed out on a major cultural event that has shaken the foundations of the earth 🌎🌍⚽
December 5, 2025 at 10:01 PM
Slept for two hours, cough (socialising into the early hours last night). Also didn't see the World Cup draw and feel as though I missed out on a major cultural event that has shaken the foundations of the earth 🌎🌍⚽
I see you've got yer Spodify Wrapped me old mate. So tell me - what's yer Lisnin' Age?
December 4, 2025 at 9:16 AM
I see you've got yer Spodify Wrapped me old mate. So tell me - what's yer Lisnin' Age?
I I only listen to The Wheels On The Bus Go Round And Round incessantly, day in, day out, so my Spotify listening age is ...
December 3, 2025 at 4:18 PM
I I only listen to The Wheels On The Bus Go Round And Round incessantly, day in, day out, so my Spotify listening age is ...
Tommy Robinson announces December 13th Christian celebration with carol singing etc.
At 15:00 hrs assemble at Speakers' Corner where Laurence "Big Lola" Fox will provide lute accompaniment to Away In A Manger and Little Donkey. There will be a whip round after.
At 15:00 hrs assemble at Speakers' Corner where Laurence "Big Lola" Fox will provide lute accompaniment to Away In A Manger and Little Donkey. There will be a whip round after.
December 3, 2025 at 12:13 PM
Tommy Robinson announces December 13th Christian celebration with carol singing etc.
At 15:00 hrs assemble at Speakers' Corner where Laurence "Big Lola" Fox will provide lute accompaniment to Away In A Manger and Little Donkey. There will be a whip round after.
At 15:00 hrs assemble at Speakers' Corner where Laurence "Big Lola" Fox will provide lute accompaniment to Away In A Manger and Little Donkey. There will be a whip round after.
No Christmas decorations will be put up this year unfortunately. The loft door is borked and the tree and decorations are in the loft. I am compensating by wearing glittery silver socks today. No more frivolity for the rest of December though 🎄🔔🌟🚫
December 1, 2025 at 12:44 PM
No Christmas decorations will be put up this year unfortunately. The loft door is borked and the tree and decorations are in the loft. I am compensating by wearing glittery silver socks today. No more frivolity for the rest of December though 🎄🔔🌟🚫
First longish walk for a few weeks.
November 30, 2025 at 5:32 PM
First longish walk for a few weeks.
A book advising you to attract birds to your garden suggested you should "scatter grated cheese around shrubs as a treat" for wrens. Maybe as a very occasional treat. You wouldn't want their little arteries to harden.
On a different note, but no less incongruous, here's my favourite entry from The RSPB book Birds of Britain and Europe. The Dunnock which apparently feeds on grated cheese under shrubberies
November 30, 2025 at 2:12 PM
A book advising you to attract birds to your garden suggested you should "scatter grated cheese around shrubs as a treat" for wrens. Maybe as a very occasional treat. You wouldn't want their little arteries to harden.
Reposted by Betty Utility
Reposted by Betty Utility
lace monitor, in dry sclerophyll forest
November 29, 2025 at 7:39 PM
lace monitor, in dry sclerophyll forest
Introduce yourself with five concerts you've seen
Marie Lloyd
Tiny Tim
Henry Hall & His Orchestra
Whistling Jack Smith
The Mormon Tabernacle Choir
Métal Urbain
Marie Lloyd
Tiny Tim
Henry Hall & His Orchestra
Whistling Jack Smith
The Mormon Tabernacle Choir
Métal Urbain
Introduce yourself with five concerts you've seen...
Tony Bennett
Sonic Youth
Bob Dylan
Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds
Pulp
In that order, on the same day, on the same stage. Glastonbury '98 (my first). The mind still boggles.
Tony Bennett
Sonic Youth
Bob Dylan
Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds
Pulp
In that order, on the same day, on the same stage. Glastonbury '98 (my first). The mind still boggles.
Introduce yourself with five concerts you've seen...
Radiohead
Beach House
Run the Jewels
Mogwai
Frank Ocean
Radiohead
Beach House
Run the Jewels
Mogwai
Frank Ocean
November 28, 2025 at 8:06 AM
Introduce yourself with five concerts you've seen
Marie Lloyd
Tiny Tim
Henry Hall & His Orchestra
Whistling Jack Smith
The Mormon Tabernacle Choir
Métal Urbain
Marie Lloyd
Tiny Tim
Henry Hall & His Orchestra
Whistling Jack Smith
The Mormon Tabernacle Choir
Métal Urbain
Reposted by Betty Utility
Fog in the valley last night was glowing with the light of blanketed buildings.
November 26, 2025 at 2:26 PM
Fog in the valley last night was glowing with the light of blanketed buildings.
Very disappointed about the budget being leaked. All around Britain people were waiting with baited breath. In scout huts, garden sheds, community centres and village halls, crowding around transistor radios. Another part of our way of life has died 😔
November 26, 2025 at 1:06 PM
Very disappointed about the budget being leaked. All around Britain people were waiting with baited breath. In scout huts, garden sheds, community centres and village halls, crowding around transistor radios. Another part of our way of life has died 😔
Reposted by Betty Utility
Don't fall for this shit
November 26, 2025 at 8:59 AM
Don't fall for this shit
Reposted by Betty Utility
A "considerate constructor" is currently ripping apart Norman Foster's City Hall, which is less than 25 years old
November 26, 2025 at 8:12 AM
A "considerate constructor" is currently ripping apart Norman Foster's City Hall, which is less than 25 years old
Reposted by Betty Utility
This is outrageous:
"One woman killed by someone close to them every 10 minutes” says UN report.
"One woman killed by someone close to them every 10 minutes” says UN report.
November 25, 2025 at 6:51 PM
This is outrageous:
"One woman killed by someone close to them every 10 minutes” says UN report.
"One woman killed by someone close to them every 10 minutes” says UN report.
Homosex
Chipotle
Boobs
Basically a re-run of 2025 then.
Chipotle
Boobs
Basically a re-run of 2025 then.
The first 3 words you see will define your 2026
Sex
Penis
Vodka
BRING. IT. ON 🎉
Sex
Penis
Vodka
BRING. IT. ON 🎉
The first 3 words you see will define your 2026.
Boyfriend
Job
Moneyass
Boyfriend
Job
Moneyass
November 25, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Homosex
Chipotle
Boobs
Basically a re-run of 2025 then.
Chipotle
Boobs
Basically a re-run of 2025 then.