i made the mistake of doing eyecontact during the event bec i can read a LOT of microexpressions and i get overwhelmed when i read people too much what the fuck

that's like 80% of the hurdle done but i am still dealing with a really limited time frame to do post event stuff

i kinda overextended myself this previous week that i kinda really thought i would die in my sleep before the cse

The anticipated fever still hasnt hit but i think it's bec im still panicking so hard with everything else

anxiety off the roof, one moment of insanity, im stabbing myself fuck this life

so tired bruh

when it became evident how utterly exhausted I have been and I just don't know how to ask for help and how much I've been drowning silently and seeing it first hand in person must've been an experience

what is this insanity, i am literally getting this //gestures// when i

Me going through the horrors talaga

I'll still deal with other stuff but ahhhh I'll have enough breather time when I'm through customs