John Porter
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jporterdoes.bsky.social
John Porter
@jporterdoes.bsky.social
35. I put words on your screen.

San Francisco 49ers writer for Sidelinr Sports, Niner Noise/Fansided and 49ers Webzone.

Music writer for Spill Magazine, New Noise Magazine and Emerging Rock Bands.
See https://www.clippings.me/jporterdoes
Pinned
About 2 years ago I resolved to start a writing career, thanks to the intervention of one of the best people I've ever met who supported me through everything.

Here's my portfolio, aka every article I've ever written.

So far.

www.clippings.me/jporterdoes
John Porter - Writing Portfolio
Writing for various publications in music and sports, writing features, opinion pieces and reviews.
www.clippings.me
4 INT for Jalen Hurts. Wonder if he'll get the TV time and ink that Brock Purdy did a few weeks ago.
December 9, 2025 at 4:50 AM
This is really interesting, considering the #49ers were supposed to have an 'easy' schedule this year. They've ended up with no real bad loss on their resume.
Toughest schedule this year (so far) by average DVOA of opponent:

1 Cardinals 9.3%
2 Titans 9.3%
3 Texans 8.5% (!!!)
4 49ers 4.6%
5 Eagles 4.5%
December 8, 2025 at 9:43 PM
Shotgun runs on 4th and 1 should be a 15-yard penalty
December 7, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Shedeur Sanders is playing well against the worst team in the league, so prepare yourself for a very long week
December 7, 2025 at 7:25 PM
Early #49ers bye week interest rooting news: Daniel Jones' injury might make that Colts game in 2 weeks a little easier, in theory...
December 7, 2025 at 7:02 PM
Reposted by John Porter
Since you wanted to see it, I'm proud to announce the launch of my #49ers substack, The 4am 49er.

As an original series of posts I will be exploring each of the 20 seasons I've loved and followed this wonderful team.

I started today with 2005:
the4am49er.substack.com/p/2005-where...

Enjoy. #fttb
2005: Where It All Began
My first season watching the 49ers was as unremarkable as it was unimaginable in today's digital age.
the4am49er.substack.com
December 5, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Since you wanted to see it, I'm proud to announce the launch of my #49ers substack, The 4am 49er.

As an original series of posts I will be exploring each of the 20 seasons I've loved and followed this wonderful team.

I started today with 2005:
the4am49er.substack.com/p/2005-where...

Enjoy. #fttb
2005: Where It All Began
My first season watching the 49ers was as unremarkable as it was unimaginable in today's digital age.
the4am49er.substack.com
December 5, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Now Shaq struggling with the balls like it's a free throw
December 5, 2025 at 6:38 PM
Tom Brady seems to be struggling with the balls, I wonder if they're overinflated.
December 5, 2025 at 6:32 PM
I have wardrobes less wooden than Rio Ferdinand
December 5, 2025 at 6:22 PM
Watching the World Cup draw and wondering why Lauryn Hill is wearing a Trotters Crash Turban
December 5, 2025 at 6:05 PM
Arne Slot's reds go one down. Put on more forwards.
December 3, 2025 at 9:48 PM
Reposted by John Porter
The product of poverty wages and austerity, all whilst we have an absurd conversation about 'the unsustainable benefits bill'
"Foodbanks are at breaking point this winter.. [Trussell] expect to hand out an emergency food parcel every 10 seconds over the next 3 months"

The UK has the sixth largest economy in the world #GMB
December 3, 2025 at 8:19 AM
One for the #49ers fans out there who follow me - I set up a '4am49er' substack a while ago for #49ers pieces that didn't have a natural fit on the sites I write on. Thinking of doing a piece on each of the 20 seasons I've followed the team, including some personal memories. What do we think? #fttb
December 2, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Kinda funny how every #49ers writer going has done something on special teams suddenly being good this week. I was there first dammit. #fttb

Tony Montana, Tony Montana, Tony Montana...
Enjoyed writing this one. The #49ers special teams are good.

Featuring Tony Montana, Tony Montana, Tony Montana. #FTTB

First article of the week for Niner Noise:

ninernoise.com/much-maligne...
A much-maligned 49ers unit led the win over the Browns
Whisper it quietly, but the 49ers' most maligned unit might actually be a positive.
ninernoise.com
December 2, 2025 at 6:21 PM
And for Sidelinr Sports:

- Please shut up about Brock Purdy.

- The #49ers off-season and trade deadline were actually good (despite the whinging)

- All paths to the playoffs are open - who knew?

All that and more:
www.sidelinrsports.com/post/the-san...

#fttb
The San Francisco 49ers Have Opened The Path To The Playoffs
Sunday's results might have been consequential in more ways than one for the 2025 49ers. Let's take a look at how...
www.sidelinrsports.com
December 2, 2025 at 4:42 PM
And my second Niner Noise post is on the #49ers breaking a 41(!)-year hoodoo on Sunday. I mostly enjoyed getting to make cultural references from before I was born. #fttb

ninernoise.com/kyle-shanaha...
Kyle Shanahan finally exorcised demons that haunted 49ers at Cleveland
There were lots of reasons to be cheerful about the San Francisco 49ers' Sunday win over the Cleveland Browns.
ninernoise.com
December 2, 2025 at 12:08 AM
Enjoyed writing this one. The #49ers special teams are good.

Featuring Tony Montana, Tony Montana, Tony Montana. #FTTB

First article of the week for Niner Noise:

ninernoise.com/much-maligne...
A much-maligned 49ers unit led the win over the Browns
Whisper it quietly, but the 49ers' most maligned unit might actually be a positive.
ninernoise.com
December 1, 2025 at 8:53 PM
I feel so pleased with that win that I've written two articles at 3am. Probably time I went to bed. I worked in some cultural references to one and some chat about the #49ers Jim Harbaugh era Tony Montana squad in another, so looking forward to sharing them with you, and whatever else I do. #fttb
December 1, 2025 at 3:25 AM
#49ers win has given me a strangely warm feeling. Really proud of the understated and at times maligned players like Skyy Moore, Alfred Collins, Darrell Luter Jr, Brock Purdy (heh) who delivered in a key game.

Fun stuff coming on NIner Noise and Sidelinr Sports this week - keep a look out! #fttb
December 1, 2025 at 3:22 AM
Instant reaction to the #49ers gritty win over the Browns. No classic - an efficient job done well by some maligned units - defense/special teams. Big shout outs to Keion White, Dee Winters, & Brock Purdy.

More on Sidelinr Sports and Niner Noise this week. Go Niners! #fttb

youtu.be/HUXFRWKZSH4?...
49ers grind to win over Browns - NFL Week 13 reaction
YouTube video by The 4am 49er (John Porter)
youtu.be
November 30, 2025 at 9:09 PM
Surely that was a safety lmao come on now #49ers
November 30, 2025 at 8:09 PM
Big 4th down stop, big drive, big TD, LOVE that 3rd down call. Kill. them. off. #49ers
November 30, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Too many 'hits' not enough tackles #49ers
November 30, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Ugly. But we're up. #49ers
November 30, 2025 at 7:19 PM