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larissakelly.bsky.social
Larissa Kelly
@larissakelly.bsky.social
2K followers 3.9K following 1K posts
Migration is beautiful.
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larissakelly.bsky.social
Photo of brown Bud Light bottles in a blue bucket.
November 20, 2025 at 10:46 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
He had his moments!
Screenshot of William Shatner from the 1960 Twilight Zone episode "Nick of Time."
November 20, 2025 at 4:14 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
The lore!
Description of an item in John Oliver's auction to support public media, reading "Leather jockstrap worn by Russell Crowe in the major motion picture Cinderella Man (2005) and later purchased by Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, during season 5 of the show, as part of Crowe's "Art of Divorce" auction in which Crowe sold his personal belongings to pay for his divorce. The jockstrap was purchased by Last Week Tonight in order to be showcased at one of the last Blockbuster locations in Anchorage, Alaska, in the hopes of increasing patronage at the video store. The jockstrap has a rich history with Last Week Tonight, as its purchase inspired Crowe to establish the John Oliver Koala Chlamydia Ward at the Australia Zoo, which helped vaccine research for koalas suffering from chlamydia. The jockstrap and Crowe went on to be featured in the season 5 finale of Last Week Tonight."
November 17, 2025 at 3:50 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Fair, although I wouldn't mind if more cities had raccoon fountains.
Picture of a fountain at the Menlo Park Caltrain station. It depicts several raccoons scrounging in and around trash cans.
November 16, 2025 at 8:35 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
www.motherjones.com/criminal-jus...
Screenshot from the 2019 Mother Jones article "Jeffrey Epstein, My Very, Very Sick Pal," which reads "[Stuart] Pivar was also present for a number of Epstein’s science summits. Epstein himself was no scientist, said Pivar, the author of Lifecode: The Theory of Biological Self-Organization and an advocate of non-Darwinian models of evolution. (This was borne out in a recent New York Times story that described Epstein’s interest in cryonics and eugenics and his wish to 'seed the human race with his DNA by impregnating women' at his New Mexico ranch.) Epstein was a dilettante, and easily distracted. But he pulled so many prominent thinkers into his social circle, using the promise of his money to create 'some kind of a mini university of thought,' that in Pivar’s view he did 'amazing, incredible, amazing, remarkable things for science.' There were lavish dinner parties with the likes of Steven Pinker and Stephen Jay Gould during which Epstein would ask provocatively elementary questions like 'What is gravity?' If the conversation drifted beyond his interests, Epstein was known to interrupt, 'What does that got to do with pussy?!'"
November 16, 2025 at 8:12 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
(To be clear, the comedy is deliberate; Emily Brontë knew exactly what she was doing when she wrote passages like this.)
Quote from Wuthering Heights: " “There, I’ve found it out at last!” cried Hindley, pulling me back by the skin of my neck, like a dog. “By heaven and hell, you’ve sworn between you to murder that child! I know how it is, now, that he is always out of my way. But, with the help of Satan, I shall make you swallow the carving-knife, Nelly! You needn’t laugh; for I’ve just crammed Kenneth, head-downmost, in the Black-horse marsh; and two is the same as one—and I want to kill some of you: I shall have no rest till I do!” “But I don’t like the carving-knife, Mr. Hindley,” I answered; “it has been cutting red herrings. I’d rather be shot, if you please.” “You’d rather be damned!” he said; “and so you shall. No law in England can hinder a man from keeping his house decent, and mine’s abominable! Open your mouth.” He held the knife in his hand, and pushed its point between my teeth: but, for my part, I was never much afraid of his vagaries. I spat out, and affirmed it tasted detestably—I would not take it on any account."
October 14, 2025 at 3:32 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
What
Wikipedia header revealing that actress Andie MacDowell's full name is Rosalie Anderson MacDowell.
October 12, 2025 at 12:26 AM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Feels like Josh Ritter is somewhere in the mix.
Lyrics from Ritter's song "Kathleen," which read Well, I know you are waiting and I know that it is not for me But I’m here and I’m ready and I saved you the passenger seat And I won’t be your last dance, just your last goodnight Every heart is a package tangled up in knots someone else tied I’ll be the one to drive you back home, Kathleen, yeah
October 6, 2025 at 3:58 AM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Formulated well by Jason Mendoza.
Screenshots from the sitcom THE GOOD PLACE. The character Jason Mendoza is saying "I'm telling you, Molotov cocktails work. Any time I had a problem, and I threw a Molotov cocktail...Boom, right away, I had a different problem." The final image shows the character Eleanor saying "He makes a strong case."
October 3, 2025 at 4:15 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
NINETEEN EIGHTY-FOUR also specifically describes propaganda footage of a boat being destroyed.
One of Winston's diary entries from George Orwell's NINETEEN EIGHTY-FOUR. It reads "April 4th, 1984. Last night to the flicks. All war films. One very good one of a ship full of refugees being bombed somewhere in the Mediterranean. Audience much amused by shots of a great huge fat man trying to swim away with a helicopter after him, first you saw him wallowing along in the water like a porpoise, then you saw him through the helicopters gunsights, then he was full of holes and the sea round him turned pink and he sank as suddenly as though the holes had let in the water, audience shouting with laughter when he sank. then you saw a lifeboat full of children with a..."
September 3, 2025 at 1:07 AM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Realizing Pedro Pascal has been in at least two recent projects with a reverse-Omelas plot, where the well-being of a single child is prioritized above the rest of humanity's survival.
Pascal as Joel Miller in THE LAST OF US. Pascal as the Earth-828 Reed Richards in THE FANTASTIC FOUR: FIRST STEPS.
August 15, 2025 at 2:30 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Sometimes the most useful way of presenting knowledge isn't the most accurate (for certain values of "accurate").

For instance, here's two different representations of a London Underground line. Superimposed on a map, the left one would seem very incorrect - but for Tube riders, it's more helpful.
Image of the Bakerloo Line, portrayed as a straight horizontal line with station names, zones, accessibility information, and connecting lines. Geographical map of the Bakerloo line, showing the stations on a twisty line that stretches from northwest to southeast. No information about zones, accessibility, or connecting lines is given. CC BY-SA 3.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=318175.
August 6, 2025 at 3:06 AM
larissakelly.bsky.social
The phrase "everything bagel liberalism" is kind of weird because it's meant to have a negative connotation, but people absolutely love everything bagels, there was an everything bagel ice cream flavor
Heaping tub of Jeni's ice cream in the Everything Bagel variety, which combined a cream cheese-flavored base with crunchy clusters of everything bagel seasoning
August 3, 2025 at 2:17 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Tweet from an account called Jared, @b1g_damage me: hey does anyone have any readings on medieval north African trade networks 17 follower alcoholic who works at a baker: [link to 157 page pdf] yeah I think this is pretty enlightening
July 28, 2025 at 8:11 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
One like = one extremely pedantic correction of a common error made by quizbowl writers
Sickos meme, showing a man wearing a t-shirt reading "Sickos" staring in through a window and saying "Yes...ha ha ha...YES!"
July 22, 2025 at 8:20 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Imagining the future ruins of modern civilization was definitely a 19th-century thing (as it continues to be a 21st-century thing)--you can see it in poems like Horace Smith's alternate version of "Ozymandias," or Henry De la Beche's cartoon about a human fossil studied by "Professor Ichthyosaurus."
1830 cartoon by Henry Thomas De la Beche, titled "AWFUL CHANGES. Man Found only in a FOSSIL STATE - REAPPEARANCE OF ICHTHYOSAURA. The drawing shows palm-like trees overlooking the shore of a river filled with attentive ichthyosaurs. On the bank of the river, an ichthyosaur wearing a 19th-century-style coat is standing at a small lectern balanced on a rock, and using a pointer to indicate a human skull. The text of the cartoon reads "A Lecture. 'You will at once perceive' continued PROFESSOR ICHTHYOSAURUS, ‘that the skull before us belonged to some of the lower order of animals; the teeth are very insignificant, the power of the jaws trifling, and altogether it seems wonderful how the creature could have procured food.’"
July 19, 2025 at 8:49 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
All of Trump's posts lately
Pages from Jon Klassen's picture book "I Want My Hat Back." The picture shows a bear asking a rabbit "Have you seen my hat?" The rabbit, who is wearing a red hat, responds "No. Why are you asking me. I haven't seen it. I haven't seen any hats anywhere. I would not steal a hat. Don't ask me any more questions." The bear responds "OK. Thank you anyway."
July 16, 2025 at 4:36 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
There's a classic Craigslist ad that offers an...unfiltered account of what it's like to own one. "Seriously, DO NOT WHISTLE."
:Home needed for Capybara I am looking for a home for my pet Capybara, Ben. He is two years old and mostly housebroken but would benefit from a home with a LARGE doggy door as he prefers to do his business outside...[text cut for space] He would also do best with an all-male household or a home with which any females are no longer capable of menstruating so as to reduce the likelihood of Ben marking his territory indoors. But we will come back to that... I considered rehoming Ben when he was young as he had a bad habit of rooting for milk from where he thought I should have nipples. Which young capybaras evidently think nipples should dangle from between one's legs. This went on for 10 weeks and thanks to an athletic cup, Ben and I both survived with only two trips to the emergency room for me. Capybaras evidently are only aggressive when it comes to eating and mating. But we will come back to that in a moment...[text cut for space] Do not whistle. Whistles are how females let the male know they are ready for mating and did I mention that Capybaras are capable of running as fast as a horse? Take it from me, the last thing you want is a 150 lb, sexually aroused rodent galloping at you at 30 mph. I wish someone would have warned me, I ended up with two broken ribs, and abrasions all over my body from his clumsy mating attempts. Seriously. DO NOT WHISTLE....[text cut for space] I recommend [having him outside] during the spring and fall as that is when he comes into rut. During this period he will rub his face on EVERYTHING as he marks it, occasionally with urine and, which this is probably the biggest drawback, mark things with his anal glands. This is especially bad because he releases an oily liquid that is for some reason, very hairy [from a] stinky black hole of doom...The only thing I found that helps to clean is industrial strength brake cleaner. Also, women who are menstruating should steer clear as Ben has been known to urinate on females [text cut for space]
July 4, 2025 at 6:40 AM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Remember when Jeopardy said abolish ICE
A $1600 Jeopardy clue, from the game that aired on February 26, 2019. It reads "Some think the electric car will abolish ICE, short for this traditional type of engine."
July 3, 2025 at 10:39 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
This February 2024 conversation between Elaine Kamarck and Ezra Klein, which keeps dwelling on how *exciting* and *fun* and *buzzy* a blitz primary would be, seems incredibly telling. Why have an orderly handover when Ro Khanna might "set people aflame"???

www.nytimes.com/2024/02/21/o...
Screenshotted quote from Elaine Kamarck: "It would be pretty wild. I think for political reporters, Ezra, it would be the most fun of your whole life, and you'd love it. I think the voters would be absolutely tuned in to their televisions. This would be great reality TV, if you will. It would be reality politics." Screenshotted quote from Ezra Klein: "CNN and MSNBC are going to start running candidate forums on the daily, as many of these that can actually be done. Because, one, they can actually shift the world — if the right 5,000 people watch this, you might just win the convention and the nomination and become the next president. They’re going to be giving speeches. They’re going to be sitting for a million interviews and podcasts — very busy time on “The Ezra Klein Show.” So there’s going to be a month or two-month period here where they’re doing the thing that you talked about with the beauty contest primaries earlier. They are trying in every form they can think of to show that they have that it factor, that they are electric, that they will win, that they know how to hold the tensions of this moment and inspire but also maybe convince voters who would be wavering from the Democrats." Screenshotted quote from Ezra Klein: "You would have a run-up period, depending on how long it is, that would not really be primary oriented but would be mass media oriented because you’re trying to shift polling, shift narratives beyond social media in a way that the delegates who are coming walk into that convention thinking, 'You know, it’s pretty clear to me that Gretchen Whitmer is the one who could win this election' or 'It’s pretty clear to me that Ro Khanna is a person setting people aflame.' And so in an often dead period, you have what would be a genuinely riveting democratic spectacle." Screenshotted quote from Elaine Kamarck saying "But I also think it would be fascinating, and I think the voters would like it, frankly. I think it would be reality TV and people would get into it, and I think they’d like it, and they might learn something about the democratic process." Ezra Klein responds "There’d be something ironic about Donald Trump losing to a better reality television show than he was able to to put on."
June 30, 2025 at 3:49 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Every time Bill Ackman's name comes up, I think about how he paid a lot of money at a charity auction to have dinner with Gourmet magazine editor Ruth Reichl, then got mad when Reichl didn't ask HIM enough questions during the meal, huffing "I'm a lot more interesting than you are . . . your loss."
Page 231 from Ruth Reichl's book SAVE ME THE PLUMS: MY GOURMET MEMOIR. It reads: "I appreciate the offer," I said, "but you'd hate it." This was surely true. They were beautiful, those people who'd bought me, tanned, toned, and wrapped in expensive clothing. Their teeth gleamed, their jewels winked, and their hair glistened in colors unknown in nature. The food was good, the talk polite. They asked endless questions about Gourmet, and I did my best to entertain them with amusing anecdotes about the magazine. I thought we were swimming along quite nicely until the man on my left threw down his fork and tossed me an angry glare. "You haven't asked me a single question," he snapped, "and I'm a lot more interesting than you are." I looked at him, stung. "I'm sorry to be a disappointment. But you're the one who bought dinner with me." "It's your loss," he replied, turning away. Going home, I replayed the moment over and over, the way you can't help touching a sore tooth. It made me wince every time. I thought about what Stevie would have done with that dinner, how he would have delighted in asking questions, getting their stories, adding them to his address book. I scrolled through my messages, looking for the man's name, and googled him. Then I just sat there, staring at the screen: I was an idiot. Ashamed and embarrassed, I crept into bed, hoping Michael was asleep. But he sensed my distress and came instantly awake. "What's wrong?" I groaned. "I was seated next to one of the most interesting figures on Wall Street and all I did was talk about myself. Brand Ruth might be good for Gourmet,, but she's turned me into an obnoxious fathead who believes her own press. I should have asked Bill Ackman a million questions." "Who's Bill Ackman?" "You know, that hedge-fund guy who's always feuding with everyone."
June 20, 2025 at 3:14 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
The defining William Goldman quote of this era has been "these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand," but a new contender arises.
Screenshots of Wallace Shawn playing Vizzini in the film THE PRINCESS BRIDE, saying "You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous of which is, "Never get involved in a land war in Asia."
June 19, 2025 at 3:34 PM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Enjoyed the Lower Decks version of this.
Jack Ransom and Shaxs from Star Trek: Lower Decks doing aerobics in a mirrored room on a starship. Both men are wearing skintight, somewhat sexualized workout clothes that are identical to outfits worn by Counselor Troi and Doctor Crusher on Star Trek: The Next Generation.
June 4, 2025 at 12:41 AM
larissakelly.bsky.social
Reminded of one of the all-time great craigslist ads
Craigslist ad showing a picture of a white Ford truck covered with a swarm of bees. The title of the ad reads "selling Ford truck - $1200." The text of the ad reasd "$1200 obo this has been a good truck for me but i have to sell it because i cant ever get to it with all of the bees around it they have been in and around it for almost 2 months now and i havent been able to get near 5 feet or else i get stung and im sick of it i still have welts from months ago stingings and i cant even get to work because i cant get to my truck so i have to sell it test drives at ur own risk i cant go with you too many bees"
May 31, 2025 at 5:12 AM
larissakelly.bsky.social
We should find the Joe Rogan of the left the same way we found the first Joe Rogan: a NewsRadio cast member who went on to star in a hit NBC show during the 2000s.
Actress Maura Tierney, in costume as her character Abby Lockhart from ER.
May 23, 2025 at 9:22 PM