but it's only been...four weeks on effexor and it feels like it's actually working?

are you telling me I just also had to target the norepinephrine in my brain all this time? LIKE THAT WAS IT?! I JUST HAD TO HIT THAT ONE TOO?!

we think that's coming off the lexapro and onto the effexor and hopefully it goes away. if not i have a gabapentin script I need to start soon.

other than that...time actually moves at a normal pace. i don't feel as sad. still sad, not as deeply sad.
my ptsd is...that's another story for a day

i'm not hungry, until i eat. then i just want to eat.
seriously i put away four hot pockets in two hours.

my libido is either all or nothing.

my sleep is...okay that doesn't count that's always been screwy with working 2nds.

my anxiety is kinda like off the chart nuts BUT

This is very fitting ‘cause this is my favorite otter video hehe

That on top of having to relive the trauma of his death with my new therapist....today was tough.

like when he helped my mom buy me a desktop, or when he and my grandma got me a tablet for my 16th birthday)

Grandpa always made sure I had some form of working computer.

My tax refund came.
I've needed one for four years.
He's been gone almost five.

It was time.

It’s this one. This one right here.
This bug eye weirdo I love so much.

Rocky wants nothing to do with it. Grizzly realized I have a cup.

GUESS WHICH LITTLE ASSHOLE IS SUDDENLY INTERESTED IN NOODLES AGAIN.

Now, Rocky is….the equivalent to a canine Hoover with a bomb shelter for a stomach. Dog can and will eat anything he thinks is remotely edible.

All is fine. Hotel living required adaption. This includes my recipes.

Tonight, I fancied up some ramen. By that I mean I put it in a cup.

We had a few close calls but so far so good.

I still feel like crap on a cracker, but I've added more bland food to my arsenal to try, and I'll...sadly probably call out tomorrow to get one more day of recuperation...but we're getting there little by little