Tortured Actuaries Department
@skipsandwichdx.bsky.social
🥪Puts a little skip in your step |
✝️Games, queer stuff, Methodism |
🏳️⚧️She/Her/Fastest Mario |
🐘Fedi: @[email protected]
🏛️Equality Arlington
✝️Games, queer stuff, Methodism |
🏳️⚧️She/Her/Fastest Mario |
🐘Fedi: @[email protected]
🏛️Equality Arlington
Sing "Ox and Ass", you cowards!
December 4, 2025 at 3:32 PM
Sing "Ox and Ass", you cowards!
Blackmore's Night's version of "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" removed the name Christ but changed nothing else.
So now it's a religiously neutral song about whichever child in Bethlehem you think reconciled God with sinners.
So now it's a religiously neutral song about whichever child in Bethlehem you think reconciled God with sinners.
December 3, 2025 at 5:07 PM
Blackmore's Night's version of "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" removed the name Christ but changed nothing else.
So now it's a religiously neutral song about whichever child in Bethlehem you think reconciled God with sinners.
So now it's a religiously neutral song about whichever child in Bethlehem you think reconciled God with sinners.
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
Whenever i read about the cognition of evangelical faith spaces i remember they sing a sex song at gatherings because it has the word “Hallelujah” in it
December 1, 2025 at 3:44 PM
Whenever i read about the cognition of evangelical faith spaces i remember they sing a sex song at gatherings because it has the word “Hallelujah” in it
Coen's Hallelujah is the most offensive instance of turning an unrelated song into a Christmas song, but Hard Candy Christmas is the funniest.
November 30, 2025 at 10:03 PM
Coen's Hallelujah is the most offensive instance of turning an unrelated song into a Christmas song, but Hard Candy Christmas is the funniest.
Ladies, be careful out in the meadow. This Parson Brown-looking snowman creep was hitting on me.
November 30, 2025 at 8:25 PM
Ladies, be careful out in the meadow. This Parson Brown-looking snowman creep was hitting on me.
First year as a Planner Girlie in earnest. I'm hitting the point in the journal where I need a pencil board to write because it's too close to the back of the cover. Hitting that right when starting the December notes is a good feeling.
November 29, 2025 at 7:33 PM
First year as a Planner Girlie in earnest. I'm hitting the point in the journal where I need a pencil board to write because it's too close to the back of the cover. Hitting that right when starting the December notes is a good feeling.
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
🏥🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏥Open Enrollment season is upon us! Affordable Care Act (ACA) Marketplace health insurance open enrollment began November 1st and continues through January 31st. Find help with open enrollment with the following resources:
⛑️ Out2Enroll: www.out2enroll.org/enrollment-h...
⛑️ Out2Enroll: www.out2enroll.org/enrollment-h...
November 24, 2025 at 11:14 PM
🏥🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏥Open Enrollment season is upon us! Affordable Care Act (ACA) Marketplace health insurance open enrollment began November 1st and continues through January 31st. Find help with open enrollment with the following resources:
⛑️ Out2Enroll: www.out2enroll.org/enrollment-h...
⛑️ Out2Enroll: www.out2enroll.org/enrollment-h...
The worst book club experience is when someone didn't read the book but still wants to participate in conversation based on what they imagine the book is saying from others' commentary.
I end up recapping to make sure they have a "fair" understanding and conversation just dies.
I end up recapping to make sure they have a "fair" understanding and conversation just dies.
November 25, 2025 at 2:43 PM
The worst book club experience is when someone didn't read the book but still wants to participate in conversation based on what they imagine the book is saying from others' commentary.
I end up recapping to make sure they have a "fair" understanding and conversation just dies.
I end up recapping to make sure they have a "fair" understanding and conversation just dies.
Bringing some digestifs to Thanksgiving because I need something classy to balance that I'm also bringing gummy bears made out of wine
November 25, 2025 at 2:56 AM
Bringing some digestifs to Thanksgiving because I need something classy to balance that I'm also bringing gummy bears made out of wine
I finally started making tamales on Christmas instead of a turkey. Told guests if that breaks anyone's heart, someone else is welcome to make a turkey. Nobody has taken me up on it yet.
it fascinates me how most everyone in the U.S. does turkey for Thanksgiving, but we are all over the map as to what we eat for Christmas (as is proper for a hugely diverse nation).
I come from a Christmas prime rib roast family, myself.
I come from a Christmas prime rib roast family, myself.
I also use the bacon method. Although turkey is Christmas dinner where I come from.
November 25, 2025 at 2:46 AM
I finally started making tamales on Christmas instead of a turkey. Told guests if that breaks anyone's heart, someone else is welcome to make a turkey. Nobody has taken me up on it yet.
Wicked: For Good is infuriating.
Giving Elphaba a song that's "The 1619 Project but for Oz" is a good idea for fleshing out act 2, but it's a dogshit song with stupid politics.
Giving Glinda a song that's just Thank Goodness but even more on the nose is a terrible choice but I like the song a lot.
Giving Elphaba a song that's "The 1619 Project but for Oz" is a good idea for fleshing out act 2, but it's a dogshit song with stupid politics.
Giving Glinda a song that's just Thank Goodness but even more on the nose is a terrible choice but I like the song a lot.
November 24, 2025 at 2:12 PM
Wicked: For Good is infuriating.
Giving Elphaba a song that's "The 1619 Project but for Oz" is a good idea for fleshing out act 2, but it's a dogshit song with stupid politics.
Giving Glinda a song that's just Thank Goodness but even more on the nose is a terrible choice but I like the song a lot.
Giving Elphaba a song that's "The 1619 Project but for Oz" is a good idea for fleshing out act 2, but it's a dogshit song with stupid politics.
Giving Glinda a song that's just Thank Goodness but even more on the nose is a terrible choice but I like the song a lot.
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
ATTENTION SPEEDRUN FANS‼️
I accidentally bought AGDQ tickets on the same day I'm supposed to get married & they cost me $2,000 (plane, registration, hotel, etc.) If anyone wants to go take my place for FREE it's going to be at the St. Marys church his name is John he's 5'10 super nice guy
I accidentally bought AGDQ tickets on the same day I'm supposed to get married & they cost me $2,000 (plane, registration, hotel, etc.) If anyone wants to go take my place for FREE it's going to be at the St. Marys church his name is John he's 5'10 super nice guy
November 21, 2025 at 5:02 PM
ATTENTION SPEEDRUN FANS‼️
I accidentally bought AGDQ tickets on the same day I'm supposed to get married & they cost me $2,000 (plane, registration, hotel, etc.) If anyone wants to go take my place for FREE it's going to be at the St. Marys church his name is John he's 5'10 super nice guy
I accidentally bought AGDQ tickets on the same day I'm supposed to get married & they cost me $2,000 (plane, registration, hotel, etc.) If anyone wants to go take my place for FREE it's going to be at the St. Marys church his name is John he's 5'10 super nice guy
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
Neat it says I can get HRT if I post feet pics every week for three months! That's a great deal!
November 21, 2025 at 2:15 AM
Neat it says I can get HRT if I post feet pics every week for three months! That's a great deal!
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
Jesus to his disciples:
Idk why a bunch of libs started following me but I’m an anarchist and you will not have a good time here.
November 19, 2025 at 12:15 AM
Jesus to his disciples:
Tim Kaine APPALLED that after GOOD FAITH NEGOTIATIONS to pass the BIPARTISAN WALLET-INSPECTOR BILL that Republicans would-
November 19, 2025 at 12:12 AM
Tim Kaine APPALLED that after GOOD FAITH NEGOTIATIONS to pass the BIPARTISAN WALLET-INSPECTOR BILL that Republicans would-
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
it is almost as if accommodating and conceding to far right ideas legitimizes them and signals to voters that the far right is a legitimate choice for governance
The Danish Social Democrats are currently on course for their worst election result since at least the Second World War, despite their brand of far-right accommodationism being touted as a blueprint for other centre-left parties.
Oh
November 18, 2025 at 2:24 PM
it is almost as if accommodating and conceding to far right ideas legitimizes them and signals to voters that the far right is a legitimate choice for governance
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
OK but if emails take down Trump, and a blow job finally ruins Clinton, it definitely proves God is a really funny woman right
November 14, 2025 at 3:12 PM
OK but if emails take down Trump, and a blow job finally ruins Clinton, it definitely proves God is a really funny woman right
Does anyone get a physical magazine/paper delivered that they recommend? I get Wired and the Methodist's "Response", and am looking to add one or two more in my annual subscription shuffling.
Long form articles or even short stories are something i want more of - i want to read good writing again.
Long form articles or even short stories are something i want more of - i want to read good writing again.
November 14, 2025 at 2:21 PM
Does anyone get a physical magazine/paper delivered that they recommend? I get Wired and the Methodist's "Response", and am looking to add one or two more in my annual subscription shuffling.
Long form articles or even short stories are something i want more of - i want to read good writing again.
Long form articles or even short stories are something i want more of - i want to read good writing again.
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
“I’m a Grok guy” is the single most embarrassing phrase ever uttered in the course of human history.
JD Vance: "I'm a Grok guy. I think it's the best. It's also the least woke."
November 14, 2025 at 2:35 AM
“I’m a Grok guy” is the single most embarrassing phrase ever uttered in the course of human history.
Pokemon AGP version and Pokemon HSTS version
November 12, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Pokemon AGP version and Pokemon HSTS version
Buying a 100" green velvet couch has made every other part of decorating an enormous headache but it's so worth it.
November 11, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Buying a 100" green velvet couch has made every other part of decorating an enormous headache but it's so worth it.
Been like "okay, we gotta start cooking more dry goods and being responsible with food spending"
So I made a lentil soup today and it's SO GOOD? Like I'm obsessed with this?
So I made a lentil soup today and it's SO GOOD? Like I'm obsessed with this?
November 11, 2025 at 12:46 AM
Been like "okay, we gotta start cooking more dry goods and being responsible with food spending"
So I made a lentil soup today and it's SO GOOD? Like I'm obsessed with this?
So I made a lentil soup today and it's SO GOOD? Like I'm obsessed with this?
Reposted by Tortured Actuaries Department
[at Tesla]
Tesla Shareholders: in recognition of your incredible gift for lowering the price of tesla stock, we would like to award you this trillion dollar bonus
Elon Musk: yeah yeah that'sa fine
Tesla Shareholders: what's the matter? you seem distracted
Musk: no i'm fine
Musk: [muttering] oates
Tesla Shareholders: in recognition of your incredible gift for lowering the price of tesla stock, we would like to award you this trillion dollar bonus
Elon Musk: yeah yeah that'sa fine
Tesla Shareholders: what's the matter? you seem distracted
Musk: no i'm fine
Musk: [muttering] oates
November 10, 2025 at 8:27 PM
[at Tesla]
Tesla Shareholders: in recognition of your incredible gift for lowering the price of tesla stock, we would like to award you this trillion dollar bonus
Elon Musk: yeah yeah that'sa fine
Tesla Shareholders: what's the matter? you seem distracted
Musk: no i'm fine
Musk: [muttering] oates
Tesla Shareholders: in recognition of your incredible gift for lowering the price of tesla stock, we would like to award you this trillion dollar bonus
Elon Musk: yeah yeah that'sa fine
Tesla Shareholders: what's the matter? you seem distracted
Musk: no i'm fine
Musk: [muttering] oates
"Thank you for your email. I will be slow to respond today because last night I finished the Retsnom route of The 100 Line: Last Defense Academy and need space to think about it. Thank you for understanding."
November 10, 2025 at 6:49 PM
"Thank you for your email. I will be slow to respond today because last night I finished the Retsnom route of The 100 Line: Last Defense Academy and need space to think about it. Thank you for understanding."