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@captaincoach.bsky.social

43 followers 56 following 190 posts

post-ironic thought slop

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Jan 29

if anyone ever feels sad or insecure pls pls pls don’t reach out to me bc i don’t know what’s that’s like <3

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 5d

im a mamdani sun, cuomo moon, and sliwa rising

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 11d

i hate my chungus life

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 14d

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 17d

today i told my dentist that barry bostwick said i had great teeth and she said “who is that” lol

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 17d

i love my chungus life

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 24d

sorry im that kind of tired that has been living in my bones for many years and sleep won’t fix

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 24d

literally wrote a similar note in my journal last week

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 24d

oh boy another piece of plastic in a new shape or color better buy this to add to my collection of other pieces of plastic that sit in my dust filled shitty apartment

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 27d

we’ve all got our own stank ya know idk why i’m voicing this shit online lol will delete this shortly

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · 29d

anyway free palestine

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Oct 2

today barry bostwick said i was amazing and that i had great teeth

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Sep 25

they would have slowed me down, this is for the best

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Sep 24

the wicked for good trailer blew my tits clean off

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Sep 24

HELL YES ANRI MENTIONED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Sep 16

yeah they gave me a sword, a lorazepam, and a box of tissues on the way out

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Sep 16

the hardest thing about adopting my new kitty is knowing in the event of civil war and/or nuclear fallout, i’m the one in my household who will have to off the kitty before we evacuate

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Sep 4

connected with my inner child this morning by open mouth chewing a raw bagel for breakfast

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Aug 27

like every now and then i forget to flush at home (I CLOSE THE LID BEFORE FLUSHING AND SOMETIMES GET DISTRACTED WITH MY HAND WASHING ROUTINE AND IM WORKING ON IT)(ALSO IM HIGH ALL THE TIME WHICH DOES NOT HELP) but like at work how are you not gonna flush your poops? there’s no lid??? JUST FLUSH!!!!!

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Aug 27

labubu

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Aug 27

what kind of sick thrill do people get from not flushing their bloody poops in public restrooms????!!!!!!

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coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Aug 26

if you or a loved one has been personally victimized by a nissan altima you could be entitled to financial compensation

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Aug 26

having another good day at work and feeling grateful. sometimes i struggle to connect to the youth but lately i think we’ve been vibing. also overall im way more knowledgeable about stuff than i was back in january which feels amazing. i want to help the youth and support their dreams ya know

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Aug 23

me? panic cutting my bangs before a show? it’s more likely than you think

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Aug 22

i’m just goofin team hehe

coach @captaincoach.bsky.social · Aug 22