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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 9h

Since we're living this meme everyday, you might as well come see the film it's from on Saturday night.

Still from the 2011 film The Cabin in the Woods of Sitterson in front of a whiteboard filled with monster names.

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Reposted by The Clinton Street Theater

The Onion @theonion.com · 1d

The Onion Investigates: Jeffrey Epstein

YouTube video by The Onion

www.youtube.com

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 2d

We too yearn for the heady days of the 1980s and 90s when decent, hardworking Portlanders could make their way in this town.

A cast photo from the movie Drugstore Cowboy.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 3d

Everyone who likes this is sexist, btw.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 3d

Kristi Noem preparing to tour the ICE facility in Portland.

Demi Moore from The Substance angrily smearing her lipstick.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 3d

Is this anything? Feels pretty forced, but gotta sell those tickets. 🤷‍♀️

A meme of Tuesday Knight from Nightmare on Elm Street 4 mimicking the line from 13 Reasons Why, saying "So you see, that's where the trouble began. That smile. That damned smile." And the second image is smiling Tarman from The Return of the Living Dead.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 7d

Great schools, but located in an increasingly reactionary state with a focus on training students for jobs in aerospace, defense, resource extraction, pharmaceuticals and global finance. Extremely conservative campus where criticism of its power or Republican policy in general is met with disdain.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 7d

Huge thanks for supporting indie theaters! It was an amazing night!

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 7d

Wrote for The Exponent twenty-plus years ago. The university was almost openly hostile to the paper—zero support, sidelined at press events. Remember when future university president Mitch Daniels was running for governor and visiting campus, he talked down to us & refused to answer basic questions.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 9d

Ready when you are, Queen General. 🫡

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 10d

🫠

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 11d

Imagine being some kid from Corvallis who just wanted college paid for and now you'll be spending Thanksgiving like this.

major henry west from the movie 28 days later standing in the rain holding a gun

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 12d

Portlanders trying different sounds to raise a crow army for the war.

image of sydney chandler from the tv show alien earth making xenomorph noises

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 13d

Somebody force femmed our lock.

a photo of a small padlock that has a sticker on it which reads tit tacs

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 14d

Alright, whatever. We added a 10:00 PM show since you all wouldn't shut the fuck up about it. cstpdx.com/event/jeffre...

Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile | Clinton Street Theater

Encore screening of The Onion’s mockumentary Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile. One night only.

cstpdx.com

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 14d

Damn. Those went quick. Only way to see it now is to grab the last remaining tickets to THE TOXIC AVENGER (1984) at 7:00 PM on Oct. 2 and then stay for mockumentary. It's a good deal, though. Plus, Night Channels is going to be there selling some cool merch.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 14d

Just put more tickets on sale. Get 'em while you can.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 15d

Thanks, Britta.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 15d

And the monkey paw curls another finger....

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 15d

Ugh. Shit. Fuck! Fine. We'll start posting on here, you filthy animals.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 15d

cstpdx.com/event/jeffre...

Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile | Clinton Street Theater

Special screening of The Onion’s mockumentary Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile. One night only.

cstpdx.com

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 15d

There are two ways to catch this one night only mockumentary.

Buy a ticket to the 9:00 PM screening: cstpdx.com/event/jeffre...

Or, buy a ticket to THE TOXIC AVENGER (1984) at 7:00 PM and stay for free: cstpdx.com/event/toxic-...

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 15d

9:00 PM, but if you get a ticket to the 7:00 PM screening of the original TOXIC AVENGER, then you can stay and watch it for free.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 15d

It will play after. If you get a ticket to Toxie, you can stay and watch it for free.

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The Clinton Street Theater @cstpdx.bsky.social · 15d

We don't have 500 followers on here, yet. But we're breaking our silence to alert all the cool kids that we'll be screening this as a special late night show on Thursday, Oct. 2. Tickets on sale soon at cstpdx.com.

The Onion @theonion.com · 15d

Forget everything you already know about America's most notorious dead person. Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile is in select theaters October 2.

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