Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 12h

Wait, the movie that got overshadowed by the Matrix and Dark City?

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 14h

Friendly reminder - "It's Morbin' Time" was never funny nor sensical, and @linkara.bsky.social killed the meme three years ago.

youtu.be/XuB62-GA1lk

Linkara kills "It's Morbin' Time"

YouTube video by tolchok89

youtu.be

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 1d

Well, the comedic highlight of his "masterpiece" involved a jar of urine.

You can tell that this was something that was trying to make "fetch" happen.

Grannys Peach GIF

ALT: Grannys Peach GIF

media.tenor.com

1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 1d

Dis gai...

I actually made a joke about how his milquetoast personality and nice-guy persona was a result of his repressed evil urges being concentrated into another persona, a la Jekyll and Hyde.

youtu.be/dFKylgGk73I

Ripper - This Guy is Un-Fucking-Believable

YouTube video by Noah Antwiler

youtu.be

1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 2d

1 2

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 2d

*Abridged Vegeta voice*

So that's THREE failures based on Disney properties starring Jared Leto; do I hear four?

Cosmic Marvel @dailycosmicmarvel.bsky.social · 2d

‘TRON: ARES’ has earned $14.3M in its opening day at the domestic box office.

For comparison, ‘MORBIUS’ opened to $17.3M.

2 2

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 2d

QT this post with someone you wish was still alive

2

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 3d

For those of you who haven't seen it, here's the video.

Funny bit of trivia - when Gina Riley was on Spicks and Specks years later, one of the songs she sang on the Substitute section was "I Touch Myself".

www.youtube.com/watch?v=dqxa...

[FAST FORWARD] MTV - Divinyls

YouTube video by FastForwardAU

www.youtube.com

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 3d

Comments on a Fast Forward sketch that was parodying the Divinyls' "I Touch Myself" video.

Yeah, they parodied the song AND the video. It's a PACKAGE DEAL.

1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 3d

Even the film version of Into the Woods, which Disney made, cut that out, alongside a lot of Rapunzel's character...and her death.

The Witch's "just give me the boy" attitude towards the giant kind of loses something without that context.

1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 3d

Disney using live action remakes as a crutch, Star Wars retreating into nostalgia after getting backlash for trying something different, Marvel using actors from the past to bolster sales...it's a three-pronged something.

1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 3d

At the very least, I'd give them "der finger".

2

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 7d

But when WandaVision features an appearance from Evan Peters and it turns out he's NOT playing the FoX-Men version of Quicksilver but a nobody named Ralph Bohner?

Well then, everyone loses their minds!

1 1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 7d

If, in Deadpool & Wolverine, they have a throwaway line about Ben Affleck's Daredevil being bumped off, or a graphic scene of Chris Evans's Human Torch getting flayed alive, nobody panics, because "at least they got closure".

1 1 1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 7d

You know what I've noticed? Nobody panics when a legacy hero gets closure. Even if their end is horrifying!

1 1 1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 7d

...well, I didn't care for Rise of Skywalker either, but responsible for COVID? Even Salt n Pepa, Matchbox 20, Tool would tell this guy that he's pushing it...and pushing his luck.

Besides, if there was a movie that caused God to punish humanity, it was more likely Cats.

2 2 11

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 8d

When pushback reared its ugly head
The frosty agents turned and fled
Brave brave frosty agents...

1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 8d

If @vaultdisneypod.bsky.social ends up doing the Guy Ritchie version of Aladdin, I made an Alan Menken-flavoured remix of the Fresh Prince theme.

If you require the instrumental for your own parody lyrics, I'll be happy to provide it.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTiG...

Will Smith - The Fresh Genie of Agrabah (redux)

YouTube video by tolchok89

www.youtube.com

1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 9d

Conservatives: "Wah! Why does all liberal media default to Nazis as the bad guys? Why can't they do like us and stereotype all queer people as sex offenders or all atheists as devil-worshippers or all non-white people as terrorists?!?"

2 3

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 9d

Guys, if WB didn't feel obligated to allow the "Snyderverse" to co-exist as an elseworlds version along more traditional DC projects like Shazam or Blue Beetle or James Gunn's Superman, then Disney shouldn't be obligated to do the same with FoX-Men or Raimiverse Spider-Man.

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 13d

Ah, here's the follow-up.

2

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 13d

this is a comment I received when I uploaded a compilation of @linkara.bsky.social critiquing the fight scenes in the Star Wars prequels.

Um, what? What's the critique here?

1 1 1

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 14d

There's LOADS OF MONEY to be made from porn and erotica.

Why does capitalism insist on taking the moral high ground HERE?

3

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 14d

Friendly reminder - the #RecastTChalla crowd only care about the recasting of that ONE specific character and not anyone else who should have already been recast by now.

All Hail Giant Dizzy Gillespie @ejriley.bsky.social · 14d

If you found the Love Bug TV movie with Bruce Campbell in that collection, keep that safe.

1 1