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Hermione, Texas Granger

@misterfungi.bsky.social

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Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · Dec 11

the Wikipedia entry for axolotls reads like a Cake song

Their heads are wide, and their eyes are lidless. Their limbs are underdeveloped and possess long, thin digits.

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Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 2h

A Reddit alert that my account is now 19 years old

Comic book guy from the Simpsons seeing a missile about to hit and saying “OH,TVE WASTED MY LIFE.”

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 13h

there’s a weird cohort of society who really seem to be completely broken by anything technology-related.

now to use technology to find out if i used “cohort” correctly

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 13h

is he on the jays or mariners?

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Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 13h

there was no reason for me to comment on this

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 13h

most cheez its aside from the original are garbage. and the generics are even worse

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Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 14h

not since the head-first slide in a league of their own

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 14h

And I don’t even care about these teams!

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 14h

No, she was in the middle too

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 14h

not sure if I ever actually saw it but the toys were great

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 14h

friendly reminder that you still have 19 days to watch Hubie Halloween before actual Halloween

Hubie’s mom wearing a shirt with a Red Cross and the words “Boner Doner” below it

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 14h

he’s always got a fun little accessory out there

Victor Robles with a mantis friend on his hat. It traveled all the way from the dugout to the outfield. I am not sure what happened after that

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Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 15h

in a way it’s much funnier that there’s just 1 mlb and nba Canadian team and they’re both named after birds

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 15h

that says 2002. must be a typo because that movie came out 10 years ago

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 17h

i truly believe this would work for any judge tbh

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Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 19h

seems overpriced

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 23h

I left the theater and thought it was just fine, but a day later I wanted to go back and see it again

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 1d

and you just know this little pervert was racking up the frequent flyer miles

toad from mario. just a little freak of man

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 1d

awfully kind of you to call the mariners Goliath

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 1d

i have to think that a lot of the crypto dorks are also in on that bubble, so when it pops they’ll start selling bitcoin to cover their losses and we could see both bubbles pop. not great!

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Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 1d

is it wood ducks or woods duck?

Wood ducks sitting on a branch above a pond

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 1d

many smart people are saying

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · Jan 2

well you have to start out by understating the “horseshoe theory” which states that eventually the extremes of both left and right politics will converge based on a set of common beliefs once only possible if you had been hit in the head with a horseshoe

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 2d

I’ve been saying (to those around me while watching a game) for years that throwing anything but fastballs over and over and over messes with batters heads. Like a multiple choice test where every answer is C. After like 3 in a row you start to question yourself

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 2d

just realized that next year is gonna be all about throwing the same off-speed pitch like 90% of the time to mess with the batter’s head. did we just solve the pitcher injury problem?

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 2d

Watching on Fubo and it’s like 2 min behind yahoo’s updates. OTA was a little better but had to turn off the tv and watch in bed

Hermione, Texas Granger @misterfungi.bsky.social · 2d

yeah, that kind of thing is just obscene

Kid Rock lyrics to the song “So Hott”

Because you know you're so hot, I want to get you alone
So hot, I want to get you stoned So hot, I don't wanna be your friend
I want to fuck you like I'm never gonna see you again
Yeah

Repeated 2 more times because they are so good