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The muppety one

@muppetk.bsky.social

380 followers 140 following 9.4K posts

So muppety. So tired. Alleged adult. Disaster Muppet. Big nerd. Cw: food for the entire account because I am stress baking like whoa for the next few years. (Queer acupuncturist. Pro vax. V lefty. Long Covid sucks four assed monkey butt.)

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · Nov 13

I just realized that my entire online presence can be summed up as screaming PLEASE FFS BE KIND into the void.

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Reposted by The muppety one

disaster-chaos- joy (mostly not on here atm) @joyfulcarla.bsky.social · 1d

yeah.

Your ancestors didn't sustain millennia of complex oral story traditions for you to call audiobooks cheating

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 1d

Feels like the absolute least they can do, but it’s still a really good step up

Bolts @boltsmag.org · 1d

Yesterday, California adopted a law to raise the pay received by incarcerated firefighters when they’re fighting a fire from $1 to $7.25 per hour—meeting the federal minimum wage. Four other new laws also give new rights to incarcerated firefighters.

California's incarcerated firefighters to see a ‘historic’ pay increase in laws Newsom signed

Hundreds of California state prisoners worked to put out this year's deadly Los Angeles wildfires, inspiring new laws that will improve their pay and open other opportunities.

calmatters.org

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 1d

Oh thats smart

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 2d

FLU SHOT ACQUIRED

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 2d

Dude: walks onto subway with ginormous tote bag

Me: IS THERE A DOG IS THERE A DOG IS THERE A DOG I DONT SEE A DOG SURELY THERE IS A DOG THE INTERNET PROMISED ME

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 2d

Maaaaybe you are a little bit overwhelmed. JUST A TEENSY BIT.

*hug*

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 4d

There’s a section of the theme song to Big Bang Theory that goes “math, science, history” that my brain always hears as Mad Science History. And that’s a book I would like to see. A book on the history of mad science.

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 5d

The judges are easily bribeable when it comes to cookies! But then, who wouldn’t be?

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 5d

I’ve also seen a cookie made from spruce tips which isn’t quite the same but it’s close and totally on my want to try list!

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 5d

😁 I knew I liked you

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 5d

I could definitely do a pine nut cookie. I bet that’d be awesome.

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 5d

*now I’m amused, not “not I’m amused”

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 5d

Ooooh, I could lick an entire pine tree!!

GLUE TOGETHER WITH WHITE CHOCOLATE

COLOR LEFTOVER WHITE CHOCOLATE WITH GREEN DYE AND POUR OVER THE TOP

….probably still more work than I’m gonna do, but not I’m amused by the idea so it could happen.

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 5d

That is impressive!

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

Thanks, I always wonder where the new folk come from. Welcome, :) I try to put out the funny.

As I say/experience much too often, if I can’t be a good example, at least let me be a hilarious warning. 😆

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

If you don’t mind me asking — you seem legit/not spam but I don’t see any mutual follows listed. May I ask what brought you over to my corner of the sky? Just curious. :)

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

BUT SHINY IS THE BEST FLAVOR 😆

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

I know, I know. Sound older, K.

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

I HAVE BEEN BAKING SINCE 1985 AND AM FIRMLY IN DENIAL ON THAT ONE

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

Pfft. Salmonella is on the shells not inside the egg. If theyre really worried they can wash your eggs for you.

(…she says without caffeine but while I’ve made myself sick on all kind of things, licking the beaters isn’t one of them)

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

Hee. That’s more artistic than I usually manage.

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

BUT WHY

THE BEATERS ARE A REWARD FOR THE BAKER

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

🤣

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

(Side Note: friend told me not to lick things. Clearly I need to bake this weekend so that there will be some condoned if less funny things to lick.)

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 6d

I am deeply overtired and have just volunteered to lick a pinecone to cheer up a friend so basically everything is pretty much as expected here.

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