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The muppety one

@muppetk.bsky.social

380 followers 140 following 9.4K posts

So muppety. So tired. Alleged adult. Disaster Muppet. Big nerd. Cw: food for the entire account because I am stress baking like whoa for the next few years. (Queer acupuncturist. Pro vax. V lefty. Long Covid sucks four assed monkey butt.)

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · Nov 13

I just realized that my entire online presence can be summed up as screaming PLEASE FFS BE KIND into the void.

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 11h

FLU SHOT ACQUIRED

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 12h

Dude: walks onto subway with ginormous tote bag

Me: IS THERE A DOG IS THERE A DOG IS THERE A DOG I DONT SEE A DOG SURELY THERE IS A DOG THE INTERNET PROMISED ME

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 12h

Maaaaybe you are a little bit overwhelmed. JUST A TEENSY BIT.

*hug*

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 2d

There’s a section of the theme song to Big Bang Theory that goes “math, science, history” that my brain always hears as Mad Science History. And that’s a book I would like to see. A book on the history of mad science.

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

The judges are easily bribeable when it comes to cookies! But then, who wouldn’t be?

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

I’ve also seen a cookie made from spruce tips which isn’t quite the same but it’s close and totally on my want to try list!

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

😁 I knew I liked you

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

I could definitely do a pine nut cookie. I bet that’d be awesome.

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

*now I’m amused, not “not I’m amused”

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

Ooooh, I could lick an entire pine tree!!

GLUE TOGETHER WITH WHITE CHOCOLATE

COLOR LEFTOVER WHITE CHOCOLATE WITH GREEN DYE AND POUR OVER THE TOP

….probably still more work than I’m gonna do, but not I’m amused by the idea so it could happen.

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

That is impressive!

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

Thanks, I always wonder where the new folk come from. Welcome, :) I try to put out the funny.

As I say/experience much too often, if I can’t be a good example, at least let me be a hilarious warning. 😆

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

If you don’t mind me asking — you seem legit/not spam but I don’t see any mutual follows listed. May I ask what brought you over to my corner of the sky? Just curious. :)

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

BUT SHINY IS THE BEST FLAVOR 😆

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

I know, I know. Sound older, K.

The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

I HAVE BEEN BAKING SINCE 1985 AND AM FIRMLY IN DENIAL ON THAT ONE

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The muppety one @muppetk.bsky.social · 3d

Pfft. Salmonella is on the shells not inside the egg. If theyre really worried they can wash your eggs for you.

(…she says without caffeine but while I’ve made myself sick on all kind of things, licking the beaters isn’t one of them)