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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2h

LITERALLY WHY ARE RUGS SOOOO EXPENSIVE. though not to shill for costco once again but they have some decent, (relatively) affordable options

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 11h

everyone successfully picked up from the airport vacation is a goooooo 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 17h

LETS GOOOOOOO YIPPEEE FOR SAM AND GIRLFRIEND!!!!!

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 21h

qpp and bestie are going to be here in six hours and im vibrating with nervous energy about it and theyre both on planes so who the fuck am i supposed to text about it!!!

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

ed stede somgfic set to austin by blake shelton by god one of these days i’ll get y’all on my ofmd country music agenda

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

there is nothing more painful or more euphorically satisfying as popping a zit inside your ear ive been trying to pop this bitch for days and im never gonna be able to recreate this high

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

yeah that feels real and correct

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

to be honest i did want everyone to see this but you were really the target audience so 🥰🥰🥰💖💖💖💖

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

YEAH. ed’s like why arent you fucking mad at me!!!! and fang is like well im just sad that you feel like you have to act that way and thats the point where ed starts crying

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

ooooh ed pushing and pushing with shittier and shittier behavior deliberately trying to get fang to legitimately punish him and finally hitting a breakdown point when fang just DOESNT no matter what he does

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

politely raises my hand. can we get weirder abut ed’s daddy issues. like weird and uncomfortable and maybe you get a tummy ache when you look at it. aka the way the pop pop scene makes me feel. but maybe more pornographic. anyways. thank you good night

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

imagine if it was an au of an au where the reunion happens when ed robs a train stede is on

Perhaps he should be afraid, but it's just that it's Ed.

No, the disquieting thing, really, is that it's Ed.

Ed, wielding a gun and robbing a train and flashing hard edges and fangs while he does it.

Oh, Ed was always strong, fearsome when he needed to be, braver than Stede ever was, of course, but— But he was never violent. Never cold. Never hard. He was that elusive and perfect mix of masculinity: man enough to handle the world as it came, soft enough that he never let it push him to brutality.

And yet, somehow, in the aftermath of Stede, something has pushed him to brutality.

Most likely someone.

Most likely a very identifiable one currently sat on his horse, the kind of poisonous soft that coos platitudes at a horse during a train robbery and drives perfect men from a perfect life for the simple crime of giving ruinous men like Stede a space within it.

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

imagine if i was writing another part to KD in 2025 for some reason

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 1d

i can tell you just from this snip and what i know of your writing you have all the necessary ingredients for it to not be shit. youre gonna tear it up 💖💖💖

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

this is the best possible thing that could ever happen to me

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

truly alaskan behavior is waiting in line in 36 degree weather in your camp chair 40 minutes before the tire store opens sipping an iced coffee. guy next to me is wearing shorts and crocs.

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

thank god

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

a little glass vial! and the little glass vial goes into the gun like a battery!

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

now that im on tidal i think i have a real shot at making zydrate anatomy my top listened to song of the year

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

WHAT THE FUCK

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

just a quick question

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

SOOOOOOOOOOOOO TRUE

hankothy @crittercolours.bsky.social · 2d

"Your highness."

The new knight's eyes burned with passion as they lifted Prince Oluwande's hand. Soft lips pressing to his skin - tender, intimate, full of desire.

The Prince barely held in a gasp. His hand had been kissed a hundred times before, but never like this...

#TealOranges #OFMDart

Digital art of Oluwande and Jim from OFMD, drawn as a prince and knight respectively. Jim is lifting Oluwande's hand and pressing a kiss to his knuckles, while looking at Oluwande with bedroom eyes. Oluwande stares at them with wide eyes.

Oluwande is wearing his Prince Azi costume with a circlet crown. Jim wears a full knight's plate armour, decorated with orange blossom engravings. They also wear a teal cape and a sword dangly earring. The background is grey to orange ombre, with a teal and gold border.

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Reposted by roach’s malewife

hankothy @crittercolours.bsky.social · 2d

"Your highness."

The new knight's eyes burned with passion as they lifted Prince Oluwande's hand. Soft lips pressing to his skin - tender, intimate, full of desire.

The Prince barely held in a gasp. His hand had been kissed a hundred times before, but never like this...

#TealOranges #OFMDart

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

hey hank?

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roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 2d

[said like my tummy hirts] yayyy

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