Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵

@undercoveremi.bsky.social

2.1K followers 530 following 7.7K posts

Freelance writer, Full-time fan trash, good cook. Temporarily posting a lot about cancer treatment and recovery, but only temporarily. She/her

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

Pinned

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · Oct 18

I’m picking up some new friends from the latest Twitter exodus, so I should reintroduce myself.

I’m Emi! I live in Houston, TX. I write sometimes but mostly I cook, swear, and hang out with my awesome husband and my two ridiculous cats. I also talk about movies and tv a lot. Y’all means all.

This is Asha. The cutest tiny calico cat laying on a dusty (sorry!) wood floor staring at the camera with big wide amber eyes. She is a princess and the ruler of the household. Her hobbies including bullying her brother, taking baths, drowning toy mice in her water bowl, and napping atop her 6 ft cat tower

A bowl of Texas chili with no beans topped with shredded cheese and a corner slice of cornbread

A bowl of minestrone soup topped with grated Parmesan cheese and two slices of French bread

Sterling Mallory Archer the enormous tuxedo goof. He is stretched out on a kitchen counter with a goofy face because he has one brain cell. He’s the sweetest guy and he loves big hugs. He requires at least 30 minutes of dedicated attention in two sessions every single day

11 5 130

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 5h

It’s so crispy! I think she’s right!

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 5h

It is extremely sweet, but excellent goblin chow

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 5h

I only get to eat like a goblin for one more week so we’re going out strong!

2 9

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 7h

My violin teacher took me to Kim Son when I was like 10. I ordered curry cause Sailor Moon always ordered curry but it was so hot! I managed to eat the whole thing cause I didn’t want to be embarrassed, but it wasn’t easy. I still credit that experience with me loving real spice now

Chron.com @chron.com · 8h

There isn't much time left to visit this staple.

Houston freeway project to close 43-year-old restaurant

There isn't much time left to visit this staple.

bit.ly

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 7h

I sew, but like barely. I’ve made less than 10 garments in my life, mostly around 2 beginner sewing classes. I can set up thread and bobbin in a machine and put in a zip ok, but I’ve never made anything that required more than a couple darts much less a fucking gusset!

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 8h

After 10 seasons of this, I know why Geoff got so weird about the word gusset on Coupling

2 3

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 8h

Shit! I’m almost done with season 10 of Sewing Bee and it’s the last one on the Roku app. Where does everyone else watch? I see they’re on YouTube but there must be a better option

1 4

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 8h

There is a 70 something year old woman here in longhorn gear having a margarita and watching the game on her phone. She’s cheering, clapping, having the best time. An old guy tried to hit on her and she dismissed him like a queen. I love her and want to travel the world with her.

1 16

Reposted by Emi the Sweary Cook🌵

rexvrex @rexvrex.bsky.social · 10h

Out and about

A No Kings poster plastered to the wall of an abandoned building in Midtown HTX

1 5

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 9h

That’s me in the coral tank lol! Yum!!
(Is this what the kids call a soft launch, except I’ve been married to him for 15 years?)

rexvrex @rexvrex.bsky.social · 9h

Back on my bullshit once again

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 9h

Yiiisssssss

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 10h

I was going to be good and stay home all day but then I thought about enchiladas and now I can’t think about anything else until I have enchiladas

2 12

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 11h

So much of modern conservatism is just “women don’t look like I want them to look so they should go to jail.”

Acyn @acyn.bsky.social · 1d

Kid Rock: Do you know what is stupid… these chicks running around on campuses with blue hair, five nose rings.

1 9

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

It’s the texture for me. Too rare and the middle is kinda gummy, which I can’t deal with. My ideal steak is rare as possible while maintaining a semi-firm texture throughout.

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

I’m worried for my girl Jasmine now. Usually bakers that kill mid season run out of steam by the finals. I believe in her though! Go Jasmine!!

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

I don’t know how they keep it together for the structure challenges. I audibly gasped at least ten times before the judging!

1 1

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

I also don’t get the boiled egg pork pie. Seems nasty to me but hey, it’s Bake Off. The cats are very invested in the meat pies though. I think they want one!

Two cats, flanking my legs, on the duvet watching Bake Off on the tv against the wall. That media console is old and a place holder! I know it’s ugly and I’m working on it lol

1 4

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

“I didn’t do a steam hole. It’ll be fine.” FAMOUS LAST WORDS! You are about to get smoked sir!

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

I don’t have many opinions on the signature. I don’t really get meat pies. It’s a me problem. The other people are right. I just… nope. Can’t do it. Gross.

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

2.5 is preferred, but I’ll eat 2-4.

Strictly 4 My Navigators @lizzslockeroom.bsky.social · 1d

3 or 4 for me.

3 6

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

Jasmine is my ride or die this season. Shes so good! And gorgeous! She always picks flavors I really love. I feel like we could hang

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

Ian is a good baker, but his hair choices are just upsetting. I think I have to look at him until at least the quarter final, and I’m going to try real hard not to be such a bitch. It’s just you can have a weird mustache or a mullet. You cannot have both!

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

Btw gonna post about in this thread, so if you haven’t seen this week’s Bake-Off, mute this thread!

1 1

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

Starting Bake-Off late — Korean BBQ again tonight, because it always improves my bloodwork. Now it’s motherfucking Pastry Week! Let’s fucking go!!

1 8

Emi the Sweary Cook🌵 @undercoveremi.bsky.social · 1d

Yes! Per person! I don’t want to hide all reposts, I just want to hide the reposts of people who constantly repost themselves.

1 6