Emi the Sweary Cook🌵
@undercoveremi.bsky.social
Freelance writer, Full-time fan trash, good cook. Temporarily posting a lot about cancer treatment and recovery, but only temporarily. She/her
Pinned
I’m picking up some new friends from the latest Twitter exodus, so I should reintroduce myself.
I’m Emi! I live in Houston, TX. I write sometimes but mostly I cook, swear, and hang out with my awesome husband and my two ridiculous cats. I also talk about movies and tv a lot. Y’all means all.
I’m Emi! I live in Houston, TX. I write sometimes but mostly I cook, swear, and hang out with my awesome husband and my two ridiculous cats. I also talk about movies and tv a lot. Y’all means all.
Oh! I also decided to brush the skin with butter this time instead of trying to get the butter under the skin cause that was really hard last time and the butter didn’t melt out - it stayed where I put it so there were two really buttery bites lol. Learning!
Gonna roast another chicken this week. This time I’m going up the ante by putting the veggies underneath it to soak up some juices.
December 1, 2025 at 2:55 AM
Oh! I also decided to brush the skin with butter this time instead of trying to get the butter under the skin cause that was really hard last time and the butter didn’t melt out - it stayed where I put it so there were two really buttery bites lol. Learning!
Talamasca is so fucking bad I am in pain. William Fichtner can’t even fix this.
Why would you hire an American actress, most famous for playing the only American on Downton Abbey, and ask her to do the most bizarre British accent? I can’t even tell which one she’s trying for
December 1, 2025 at 2:32 AM
Talamasca is so fucking bad I am in pain. William Fichtner can’t even fix this.
Reposted by Emi the Sweary Cook🌵
Why would you hire an American actress, most famous for playing the only American on Downton Abbey, and ask her to do the most bizarre British accent? I can’t even tell which one she’s trying for
December 1, 2025 at 1:36 AM
Why would you hire an American actress, most famous for playing the only American on Downton Abbey, and ask her to do the most bizarre British accent? I can’t even tell which one she’s trying for
I have a second awful lip sore in less than a month! Once again on the top lip where the bow is and where it looks worst and hurts most. I was supposed to get them with chemo but I never did. Maybe it’s a lingering side effect? Those can happen for months after.
December 1, 2025 at 1:28 AM
I have a second awful lip sore in less than a month! Once again on the top lip where the bow is and where it looks worst and hurts most. I was supposed to get them with chemo but I never did. Maybe it’s a lingering side effect? Those can happen for months after.
It is wrong that this man shares a name with Brian Johnson of AC/DC. One who thinks he can live forever and one who drank aftershave. The coolness gap between the two might as well be infinite.
bryan johnson is proof you can't just fix people with estrogen. they have to be trans for it to work
November 30, 2025 at 11:06 PM
It is wrong that this man shares a name with Brian Johnson of AC/DC. One who thinks he can live forever and one who drank aftershave. The coolness gap between the two might as well be infinite.
Gonna roast another chicken this week. This time I’m going up the ante by putting the veggies underneath it to soak up some juices.
November 30, 2025 at 7:25 PM
Gonna roast another chicken this week. This time I’m going up the ante by putting the veggies underneath it to soak up some juices.
Reposted by Emi the Sweary Cook🌵
I got an elliptical a few months ago and the annual cholesterol test confirmed my worst fears: exercise really does work
November 30, 2025 at 5:26 AM
I got an elliptical a few months ago and the annual cholesterol test confirmed my worst fears: exercise really does work
Just in case anyone is passively suicidal like I used to be — you’re awesome and worth fighting for. I wish it hadn’t taken me a cancer diagnosis and a year of grueling treatment to realize that.
November 30, 2025 at 5:27 AM
Just in case anyone is passively suicidal like I used to be — you’re awesome and worth fighting for. I wish it hadn’t taken me a cancer diagnosis and a year of grueling treatment to realize that.
Who is your favorite familiar and why is it Toula?
I have done all of the things in Hades 2. Post credits and everything. Ranked up all the way at the tavern and there is literally nothing for me to sink resources into. Yet I cannot stop playing. It is too fun to mow down wraiths!
November 30, 2025 at 5:15 AM
Who is your favorite familiar and why is it Toula?
Reposted by Emi the Sweary Cook🌵
Put me on the ice floe
Winona Ryder is older than Rue McClanahan was when Golden Girls first aired
November 30, 2025 at 3:55 AM
Put me on the ice floe
Pretty Woman. Not usually my thing but I saw it young and it is fabulous. My mom still talks about visiting me while I was playing my Barbies and asked what Barbie did “she’s a hooker!! Like Pretty Woman!!”
What is a movie that you love that would surprise most people who know you?
November 30, 2025 at 4:42 AM
Pretty Woman. Not usually my thing but I saw it young and it is fabulous. My mom still talks about visiting me while I was playing my Barbies and asked what Barbie did “she’s a hooker!! Like Pretty Woman!!”
I have done all of the things in Hades 2. Post credits and everything. Ranked up all the way at the tavern and there is literally nothing for me to sink resources into. Yet I cannot stop playing. It is too fun to mow down wraiths!
November 30, 2025 at 4:33 AM
I have done all of the things in Hades 2. Post credits and everything. Ranked up all the way at the tavern and there is literally nothing for me to sink resources into. Yet I cannot stop playing. It is too fun to mow down wraiths!
Fuck yeah. Haven’t lost my touch
@undercoveremi.bsky.social has swears! They've used 635 profanities in their last 2,375 posts.
🥇 "fucking" (242 times)
🥈 "fuck" (96 times)
🥉 "shit" (71 times)
🥇 "fucking" (242 times)
🥈 "fuck" (96 times)
🥉 "shit" (71 times)
November 30, 2025 at 4:30 AM
Fuck yeah. Haven’t lost my touch
This is violence
Winona Ryder is older than Rue McClanahan was when Golden Girls first aired
November 30, 2025 at 3:37 AM
This is violence
Reposted by Emi the Sweary Cook🌵
Escort missions
November 30, 2025 at 3:19 AM
Escort missions
Getting back on my cancer forum so I can help others the way they helped me when I got cancer. Yay!
“Help I’m 75% of the way through chemo and I can’t ejaculate!”
Nope. Bye. See y’all later!
“Help I’m 75% of the way through chemo and I can’t ejaculate!”
Nope. Bye. See y’all later!
November 30, 2025 at 3:06 AM
Getting back on my cancer forum so I can help others the way they helped me when I got cancer. Yay!
“Help I’m 75% of the way through chemo and I can’t ejaculate!”
Nope. Bye. See y’all later!
“Help I’m 75% of the way through chemo and I can’t ejaculate!”
Nope. Bye. See y’all later!
Reposted by Emi the Sweary Cook🌵
we’ve entered a post food society
November 30, 2025 at 2:11 AM
we’ve entered a post food society
After two Thanksgivings I simply cannot plan next week’s meals. I cannot imagine being hungry again.
November 30, 2025 at 12:49 AM
After two Thanksgivings I simply cannot plan next week’s meals. I cannot imagine being hungry again.
It’s fine to be religious, but it is fucking wild to think your interpretation of your religious beliefs apply to anyone but you. It crazy how axiomatic this is. “Because God said so!” Did he? Are you sure? Or did your parents say it?
Turning Point at OU posted this girl's essay in full and man is it rough
November 30, 2025 at 12:21 AM
It’s fine to be religious, but it is fucking wild to think your interpretation of your religious beliefs apply to anyone but you. It crazy how axiomatic this is. “Because God said so!” Did he? Are you sure? Or did your parents say it?
No!
Rosencranz and Guildenstern and I weep. www.nytimes.com/2025/11/29/t...
Tom Stoppard, Award-Winning Playwright of Witty Drama, Dies at 88
www.nytimes.com
November 29, 2025 at 11:14 PM
No!
A lot of people keep assuming Carol on Pluribus is an alcoholic just cause she has an interlock on her car and I object! I’m an alcoholic and I’ve never had one of those because when I drink I pick a spot and I fucking stay there. Weekend drunks get interlocks cause they wanna check out 5 bars.
November 28, 2025 at 10:03 PM
A lot of people keep assuming Carol on Pluribus is an alcoholic just cause she has an interlock on her car and I object! I’m an alcoholic and I’ve never had one of those because when I drink I pick a spot and I fucking stay there. Weekend drunks get interlocks cause they wanna check out 5 bars.
Universal forgiveness on not working out today, right?
November 28, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Universal forgiveness on not working out today, right?
This and also the opposite. If people do drink, that’s good and fine! It’s a holiday! The only poor behaviors here are being a dick about people drinking or not drinking, or getting so drunk you become a problem.
seasonal reminder that if someone says they don't drink:
-it's none of your business why
-hosts should have several non-alcoholic beverage options
-the holidays can be a tough period for non-drinkers
-many jokes about not drinking are bad
-people are burned out and might just be tired
-it's none of your business why
-hosts should have several non-alcoholic beverage options
-the holidays can be a tough period for non-drinkers
-many jokes about not drinking are bad
-people are burned out and might just be tired
November 28, 2025 at 6:45 PM
This and also the opposite. If people do drink, that’s good and fine! It’s a holiday! The only poor behaviors here are being a dick about people drinking or not drinking, or getting so drunk you become a problem.