Bent Headlines
@bentheadlines.bsky.social
Original humor writing. Wordplay, satire, parody, fun. Optimist. Newsman.
Woman acclimating to knee prostheses not ready to trust it off leash
December 28, 2025 at 5:11 PM
Woman acclimating to knee prostheses not ready to trust it off leash
Neighbors still haven't taken down Christmas icicles
December 28, 2025 at 12:27 AM
Neighbors still haven't taken down Christmas icicles
Palliative care patient rallies—comforts EOL care robot suffering Windows blue screen
December 26, 2025 at 7:48 PM
Palliative care patient rallies—comforts EOL care robot suffering Windows blue screen
Woman recovering from knee surgery glad for new book she simply can't get up and easily walk away from
December 26, 2025 at 1:12 AM
Woman recovering from knee surgery glad for new book she simply can't get up and easily walk away from
BigBuddy 4000 heater vows to "Crush. Kill. Destroy." competition
December 25, 2025 at 4:37 PM
BigBuddy 4000 heater vows to "Crush. Kill. Destroy." competition
Giraffes don't learn from Star-Belly Sneetches
December 23, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Giraffes don't learn from Star-Belly Sneetches
Ant colony white-knuckles through another family vacation #entomology
December 22, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Ant colony white-knuckles through another family vacation #entomology
Inuit, Sámi scramble for dozens of new words for snowmelt
December 21, 2025 at 12:36 PM
Inuit, Sámi scramble for dozens of new words for snowmelt
Gil Gerard, hero of 25th century, somehow dead in 21st
December 19, 2025 at 2:37 PM
Gil Gerard, hero of 25th century, somehow dead in 21st
Obstreperous bookworms ransack Little Free Real Estate Listing Library in high-minded rage
December 18, 2025 at 6:58 PM
Obstreperous bookworms ransack Little Free Real Estate Listing Library in high-minded rage
Marine predator the size of bus ferried prey along ancient river service stops 66 million years ago
December 15, 2025 at 7:15 PM
Marine predator the size of bus ferried prey along ancient river service stops 66 million years ago
Geriatrics step on Washington in remonstration of mall closings
December 15, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Geriatrics step on Washington in remonstration of mall closings
Fencepost turtle new Harvard legacy admit
December 14, 2025 at 9:57 PM
Fencepost turtle new Harvard legacy admit
Scooter McCain grounded after bouncing 8th AD Skyraider off deck of Navy flattop
December 11, 2025 at 9:36 PM
Scooter McCain grounded after bouncing 8th AD Skyraider off deck of Navy flattop
Clipped! Another former child actor arrested for meth, assault, Trump support
December 10, 2025 at 2:49 AM
Clipped! Another former child actor arrested for meth, assault, Trump support
Neunundneunzig Luftballons treffen auf ein Lufthansa
December 9, 2025 at 2:00 PM
Neunundneunzig Luftballons treffen auf ein Lufthansa
Battleship New Jersey embraces reputation for colorful, profanity-laced signal flagging
December 7, 2025 at 11:19 PM
Battleship New Jersey embraces reputation for colorful, profanity-laced signal flagging
Guy doesn't know what makes him buy the crap he buys
December 7, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Guy doesn't know what makes him buy the crap he buys
Jack Finney recognized with Lifetime Achievement Award
December 5, 2025 at 2:46 PM
Jack Finney recognized with Lifetime Achievement Award
Wordle releases three-fifths scale model
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December 2, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Wordle releases three-fifths scale model
⬛🟨🟨
🟨⬛⬛
🟩🟩🟩
⬛🟨🟨
🟨⬛⬛
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MA woman crashes into cranberry bog, adds sugar, comes to boil
November 27, 2025 at 2:29 PM
MA woman crashes into cranberry bog, adds sugar, comes to boil
FBI releases Bigfoot's official file per family's request
November 25, 2025 at 3:39 PM
FBI releases Bigfoot's official file per family's request
Guy up watching yet another Accident Case Study: A Case Study
November 21, 2025 at 11:35 PM
Guy up watching yet another Accident Case Study: A Case Study
Stoics, stones break man's bones
November 21, 2025 at 11:33 AM
Stoics, stones break man's bones
Broccoli stalk soup keeps showing up at chickpea's workplace
November 20, 2025 at 11:45 AM
Broccoli stalk soup keeps showing up at chickpea's workplace