Stuart
@captainlinger5678.bsky.social
Happily married freelance writer, here to help rid the world of the MAGA plague. That and have fun talking to like-minded people.
👩❤️👨 🐶 🐶 💙 🌈 ⌨️ 🎸 🎞️ 📺 🍺 🥃 🍷 🏈 and whatnot.
👩❤️👨 🐶 🐶 💙 🌈 ⌨️ 🎸 🎞️ 📺 🍺 🥃 🍷 🏈 and whatnot.
Pinned
Stuart
@captainlinger5678.bsky.social
· Feb 24
Once upon a time, I wrote fun stuff. None of it had to do with Diaper Donny or the crap that makes my blood boil today. Some of it was for Cartoon Network, before Adult Swim. Every day, I'm going to post something I wrote then that reminds me of a time when a fun country wasn't going to shit.
I can’t help wondering if some of that is just jealousy, knowing every kid walking out of those schools has better reading skills than they do. Especially the first graders.
ICE Is Circling Minnesota Schools, Looking For Children to Take
Liam Ramos, 5, isn’t the only child in detention. Teachers and parents describe kids being hunted by federal agents.
www.huffpost.com
January 31, 2026 at 8:55 PM
I can’t help wondering if some of that is just jealousy, knowing every kid walking out of those schools has better reading skills than they do. Especially the first graders.
"They're eating the early-bird specials! Roving gangs of retirees eating the early bird specials."
Thank God we finally have an administration that's not afraid to stand up to the worst of the worst.
Thank God we finally have an administration that's not afraid to stand up to the worst of the worst.
Trump's ICE shocks by drawing guns on retired couple: 'These thugs are the Proud Boys'
President Donald Trump's immigration forces stunned observers on Wednesday after they drew their weapons on an elderly couple in a church parking lot in Minneapolis. The retired couple spoke with jour...
www.rawstory.com
January 28, 2026 at 10:12 PM
"They're eating the early-bird specials! Roving gangs of retirees eating the early bird specials."
Thank God we finally have an administration that's not afraid to stand up to the worst of the worst.
Thank God we finally have an administration that's not afraid to stand up to the worst of the worst.
A little levity for a moment...
In celebration of 50 seasons of Survivor, here is the parody I wrote for it for Cartoon Network. It hadn't even hit the air yet when I was asked to write it, but just the buzz about it alone meant Cartoon Network had to parody it.
youtu.be/Ro_yY1LULhw?...
In celebration of 50 seasons of Survivor, here is the parody I wrote for it for Cartoon Network. It hadn't even hit the air yet when I was asked to write it, but just the buzz about it alone meant Cartoon Network had to parody it.
youtu.be/Ro_yY1LULhw?...
Cartoon Network - Staylongers (Full Length) - 4K
YouTube video by Sover_
youtu.be
January 28, 2026 at 5:20 PM
A little levity for a moment...
In celebration of 50 seasons of Survivor, here is the parody I wrote for it for Cartoon Network. It hadn't even hit the air yet when I was asked to write it, but just the buzz about it alone meant Cartoon Network had to parody it.
youtu.be/Ro_yY1LULhw?...
In celebration of 50 seasons of Survivor, here is the parody I wrote for it for Cartoon Network. It hadn't even hit the air yet when I was asked to write it, but just the buzz about it alone meant Cartoon Network had to parody it.
youtu.be/Ro_yY1LULhw?...
I, for one, will be happy when J.D. Vance is matched through the streets of DC with a shaved head and Trump branded on his forehead.
January 10, 2026 at 2:36 AM
I, for one, will be happy when J.D. Vance is matched through the streets of DC with a shaved head and Trump branded on his forehead.
I’ve never known an administration where “soulless fuck” is a mandatory for being named to the cabinet.
January 9, 2026 at 1:28 AM
I’ve never known an administration where “soulless fuck” is a mandatory for being named to the cabinet.
I’m getting a jump on my New Year’s Resolutions. I vow to stop saying, “I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.”
December 19, 2025 at 12:48 AM
I’m getting a jump on my New Year’s Resolutions. I vow to stop saying, “I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.”
Reposted by Stuart
I guess when you're a rapist AND pedophile AND traitor to your country, empathy is not something you've ever considered a necessity.
December 15, 2025 at 7:19 PM
I guess when you're a rapist AND pedophile AND traitor to your country, empathy is not something you've ever considered a necessity.
I guess when you're a rapist AND pedophile AND traitor to your country, empathy is not something you've ever considered a necessity.
December 15, 2025 at 7:19 PM
I guess when you're a rapist AND pedophile AND traitor to your country, empathy is not something you've ever considered a necessity.
The turd doesn’t fall far from the diaper.
Donald Trump Jr.’s ’Disgusting’ Children’s Book Attack On Tim Walz Draws Condemnation
Donald Trump's son parroted his father's insulting of the Minnesota governor.
www.huffpost.com
December 8, 2025 at 3:33 PM
The turd doesn’t fall far from the diaper.
To celebrate, Trump immediately ordered Hegseth to blow up every boat in the San Francisco Bay.
December 5, 2025 at 6:25 PM
To celebrate, Trump immediately ordered Hegseth to blow up every boat in the San Francisco Bay.
What a coincidence! Half of Americans see him as an enemy of America.
Half of Europeans see Trump as enemy of Europe, survey finds
Nine-country poll finds half of people believe risk of war with Russia is high and three-quarters want to stay in EU
www.theguardian.com
December 5, 2025 at 3:33 PM
What a coincidence! Half of Americans see him as an enemy of America.
Apologies for being a bit gross, but I can't help wondering how many snot rockets ICE Agents unknowingly eat every day? I mean, at the places that will still even serve them.
November 20, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Apologies for being a bit gross, but I can't help wondering how many snot rockets ICE Agents unknowingly eat every day? I mean, at the places that will still even serve them.
Reposted by Stuart
Hey ChatGPT, how many Republican congresswomen have called Trump out for calling a reporter Piggy?
November 19, 2025 at 1:32 PM
Hey ChatGPT, how many Republican congresswomen have called Trump out for calling a reporter Piggy?
Well, that checks a box.
November 19, 2025 at 12:01 AM
Well, that checks a box.
If the MAGA base is satisfied with this bullshit move, they're even more stupid than I thought. Like, centuries and centuries ago stupid. But they will get to enjoy discovering fire.
Trump Administration Live Updates: Bondi Assigns Prosecutor to Look Into Epstein’s Ties to Prominent Democrats
www.nytimes.com
November 14, 2025 at 8:36 PM
If the MAGA base is satisfied with this bullshit move, they're even more stupid than I thought. Like, centuries and centuries ago stupid. But they will get to enjoy discovering fire.
Dear Megyn Kelly,
I understand you're confused about what constitutes pedophilia. Not that it surprises me, you seem to be confused by a lot of things most people aren't. But until you figure it out, please don't tell men (stupid enough) to listen to you it's okay to have sex with girls under 18.
I understand you're confused about what constitutes pedophilia. Not that it surprises me, you seem to be confused by a lot of things most people aren't. But until you figure it out, please don't tell men (stupid enough) to listen to you it's okay to have sex with girls under 18.
November 14, 2025 at 7:48 PM
Dear Megyn Kelly,
I understand you're confused about what constitutes pedophilia. Not that it surprises me, you seem to be confused by a lot of things most people aren't. But until you figure it out, please don't tell men (stupid enough) to listen to you it's okay to have sex with girls under 18.
I understand you're confused about what constitutes pedophilia. Not that it surprises me, you seem to be confused by a lot of things most people aren't. But until you figure it out, please don't tell men (stupid enough) to listen to you it's okay to have sex with girls under 18.
Sometimes I wonder if Donald Trump lies in bed at night wishing he’d never met Jeffrey Epstein and molested and raped all those underaged girls. Then I remind myself who Donald Trump is and the answer is no, he doesn’t. Then I wish I could have those 5 seconds of wondering back.
November 14, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Sometimes I wonder if Donald Trump lies in bed at night wishing he’d never met Jeffrey Epstein and molested and raped all those underaged girls. Then I remind myself who Donald Trump is and the answer is no, he doesn’t. Then I wish I could have those 5 seconds of wondering back.
Reposted by Stuart
I want a reporter to ask J.D. Vance, Marco Rubio, Mike Johnson and Lindsey Graham, among others, what they think of pedophiles, and get their exact response on record. Then we can compare it to what they say after Trump is finally exposed.
October 21, 2025 at 9:22 PM
I want a reporter to ask J.D. Vance, Marco Rubio, Mike Johnson and Lindsey Graham, among others, what they think of pedophiles, and get their exact response on record. Then we can compare it to what they say after Trump is finally exposed.
Me and a few thousand friends in Dallas yesterday. 100% peaceful, as it was everywhere. A very nice lady asked if she could take a picture of my shirt. She then told me I looked like Robert Plant. I thanked the nice lady profusely, then wished her luck on her upcoming cataract surgery.
October 19, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Me and a few thousand friends in Dallas yesterday. 100% peaceful, as it was everywhere. A very nice lady asked if she could take a picture of my shirt. She then told me I looked like Robert Plant. I thanked the nice lady profusely, then wished her luck on her upcoming cataract surgery.
Wrong, you soulless fuck. Kids are who Trump had sex with. These were adults making these comments. But I understand why you would come to their defense.
JD Vance brushes off racist texts by adults in Republican group chat as ‘what kids do’
Vice-president downplays messages such as ‘I love Hitler’ in chat by 24 to 35-year-olds to ‘stupid jokes’
www.theguardian.com
October 16, 2025 at 6:45 PM
Wrong, you soulless fuck. Kids are who Trump had sex with. These were adults making these comments. But I understand why you would come to their defense.
When I think back to all the years in junior and senior high, showering after PE class, I only now realize how prolific autism must have been.
October 9, 2025 at 10:19 PM
When I think back to all the years in junior and senior high, showering after PE class, I only now realize how prolific autism must have been.
Wait until all the MAGATs upset about Bad Bunny performing at halftime see all those D.E.I. hires playing on the field.
October 7, 2025 at 4:10 PM
Wait until all the MAGATs upset about Bad Bunny performing at halftime see all those D.E.I. hires playing on the field.
Somewhere George Carlin and Lenny Bruce are watching wondering what the fuck happened to comedy.
But congratulations on your Soulless Fuck Tour.
But congratulations on your Soulless Fuck Tour.
October 5, 2025 at 1:34 AM
Somewhere George Carlin and Lenny Bruce are watching wondering what the fuck happened to comedy.
But congratulations on your Soulless Fuck Tour.
But congratulations on your Soulless Fuck Tour.