Author | Lightnews

The last Chuck-E-cheese

@chuckeplease.bsky.social

57 followers 1 following 34 posts

Now with 74% less asbestos The lawsuits couldnt keep us down

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 6h

Please do not contact the health department. Those are just members of Chuck's family who have come to visit him for the weekend! Please do not contact the health department

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 21h

No, trust us, they were just getting started.

The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 1d

Free exposure, baby

Reposted by The last Chuck-E-cheese

The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 1d

Ok, we can't believe we have to make a statement about this, but the booger wall behind table 14 is not an official Chuck-E-cheese attraction, and anyone caught contributing to it will be banned

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 1d

The Michelin guide describes our pizza's texture as "distressing"

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 1d

And by the 80s, we mean 1977

The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 1d

Or at table 14

The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 1d

Well, not BANNED banned, but like you will have to finish your plate in your car

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 1d

Ok, we can't believe we have to make a statement about this, but the booger wall behind table 14 is not an official Chuck-E-cheese attraction, and anyone caught contributing to it will be banned

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Someone died

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

It has been banned from all chuck-E-cheese facilities since 1991. Didn't you read the sign?

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Re: that kid who died

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Plus, it's only as of very recently

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Stop spreading the hurtful rumor that the mascots are haunted. Only the men's toilet is.

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Yes, we know that rat mascot for a restaurant is kinda insane but you gotta understand how different the coke hit back in the 80's

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Our lawyer told us not to endorse this statement

The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Please bring your own inhaler when visiting our restaurant

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Just don't worry about it

The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

It's also supposed to look like that

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

Dont worry. The pizza is actually supposed to taste like that

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 2d

The Hulk Hogan pinball machine that shouts "hell yeah, brother"every time you score is broken. This is like losing Hulk Hogan a second time, which is actually kind of a rush if we're being honest

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 3d

None of our staff has problematic tattoos. Except Todd, who got pickle rick tattooed while going through a nasty divorce

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 3d

Meet us out back in 10 minutes and bring 20$

The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 3d

Due to the McDonald's across town installing a ball pit and a slide and in the spirit of competition, we have decided to let you smoke inside

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The last Chuck-E-cheese @chuckeplease.bsky.social · 3d

While supplies last