DasLyfe
@daslyfe.com
Dad with dad jokes. Typically irreverent. Sometimes a Twitch gamer and YouTube Noob. Not a ballerina.
Whoever made the Ding Fries are Done song, you have ruined Christmas music for me every year for the past 30 years.
Actually, I kinda like it, but my family can’t stand me singing it.
Actually, I kinda like it, but my family can’t stand me singing it.
December 3, 2025 at 1:00 PM
Whoever made the Ding Fries are Done song, you have ruined Christmas music for me every year for the past 30 years.
Actually, I kinda like it, but my family can’t stand me singing it.
Actually, I kinda like it, but my family can’t stand me singing it.
The summer theatre I worked at back in high school had an industrial clothes dryer it used as set dressing for a show.
I plugged it in and was delighted to learn it still spun, just without heat.
Long story short I now hold the record for longest time spent inside a spinning dryer.
I plugged it in and was delighted to learn it still spun, just without heat.
Long story short I now hold the record for longest time spent inside a spinning dryer.
November 27, 2025 at 1:01 AM
The summer theatre I worked at back in high school had an industrial clothes dryer it used as set dressing for a show.
I plugged it in and was delighted to learn it still spun, just without heat.
Long story short I now hold the record for longest time spent inside a spinning dryer.
I plugged it in and was delighted to learn it still spun, just without heat.
Long story short I now hold the record for longest time spent inside a spinning dryer.
Overheard in a medical waiting room:
Wife: “I’m ready for anything with my purse. You need a Tide pen? I got it in here. What do you need?”
Husband, signing: “I need a good divorce attorney.”
Wife: “I’m ready for anything with my purse. You need a Tide pen? I got it in here. What do you need?”
Husband, signing: “I need a good divorce attorney.”
November 26, 2025 at 10:34 PM
Overheard in a medical waiting room:
Wife: “I’m ready for anything with my purse. You need a Tide pen? I got it in here. What do you need?”
Husband, signing: “I need a good divorce attorney.”
Wife: “I’m ready for anything with my purse. You need a Tide pen? I got it in here. What do you need?”
Husband, signing: “I need a good divorce attorney.”
While making a white bean and turkey soup tonight, I added mustard powder on a hunch that it might work with the flavor profile.
Holy hell, it’s like a secret ingredient. No mustard flavor, just a depth and richness. Almost like umami.
Holy hell, it’s like a secret ingredient. No mustard flavor, just a depth and richness. Almost like umami.
a man standing in a bathroom with the words " it is so choice " above him
ALT: a man standing in a bathroom with the words " it is so choice " above him
media.tenor.com
November 25, 2025 at 2:21 AM
While making a white bean and turkey soup tonight, I added mustard powder on a hunch that it might work with the flavor profile.
Holy hell, it’s like a secret ingredient. No mustard flavor, just a depth and richness. Almost like umami.
Holy hell, it’s like a secret ingredient. No mustard flavor, just a depth and richness. Almost like umami.
I wonder if tinnitus is a prerequisite for the Salvation Army, or if it’s just a bonus for the bell ringers?
November 22, 2025 at 7:45 PM
I wonder if tinnitus is a prerequisite for the Salvation Army, or if it’s just a bonus for the bell ringers?
Every supercut of the president claiming prices are coming down and how everything is great reminds me of the Iraqi Information Minister at the start of the second Gulf war.
You have to be old enough to completely appreciate how accurate that is.
You have to be old enough to completely appreciate how accurate that is.
a man in a military uniform is talking and says `` no problems , everything is fine . ''
ALT: a man in a military uniform is talking and says `` no problems , everything is fine . ''
media.tenor.com
November 21, 2025 at 2:49 AM
Every supercut of the president claiming prices are coming down and how everything is great reminds me of the Iraqi Information Minister at the start of the second Gulf war.
You have to be old enough to completely appreciate how accurate that is.
You have to be old enough to completely appreciate how accurate that is.
He’ll release his tax returns before we see the files.
November 20, 2025 at 2:35 AM
He’ll release his tax returns before we see the files.
I printed a Nanakatana as a gift for a 10 year old and now I have to make one for the whole class. #3dprinting #NanaKatana
November 8, 2025 at 2:08 AM
I printed a Nanakatana as a gift for a 10 year old and now I have to make one for the whole class. #3dprinting #NanaKatana
No matter how much leash I give him, my dog only wants to sniff the spot just out of reach.
There’s a life lesson in there somewhere.
There’s a life lesson in there somewhere.
November 8, 2025 at 12:19 AM
No matter how much leash I give him, my dog only wants to sniff the spot just out of reach.
There’s a life lesson in there somewhere.
There’s a life lesson in there somewhere.
Given the current state of our slang, I bet a number of people who’ve never seen the movie before completely misunderstand what those boys were up to in The Goonies.
a man in a pirate hat is saying hey you guys !!
ALT: a man in a pirate hat is saying hey you guys !!
media.tenor.com
November 2, 2025 at 12:35 AM
Given the current state of our slang, I bet a number of people who’ve never seen the movie before completely misunderstand what those boys were up to in The Goonies.
Adults don’t understand why young kids love to say 6-7, but young kids don’t understand why adults love to say 6-9.
November 1, 2025 at 2:12 AM
Adults don’t understand why young kids love to say 6-7, but young kids don’t understand why adults love to say 6-9.
Technically speaking, my cardboard spaceship does in fact orbit the Sun.
October 30, 2025 at 2:48 PM
Technically speaking, my cardboard spaceship does in fact orbit the Sun.
My Uber just took me past a trailer community called Park Place and that’s it y’all, we can stop trying. They did it, they found the perfect name!
October 29, 2025 at 2:06 PM
My Uber just took me past a trailer community called Park Place and that’s it y’all, we can stop trying. They did it, they found the perfect name!
Ready for Halloween #3Dprinting #FullSizeCandyBar
October 26, 2025 at 12:34 AM
Ready for Halloween #3Dprinting #FullSizeCandyBar
It seems the US military might be manipulated into bombing any boat just by claiming it contains drugs.
Surely no country or organization would ever consider taking advantage of that. Right?
Surely no country or organization would ever consider taking advantage of that. Right?
October 15, 2025 at 10:52 PM
It seems the US military might be manipulated into bombing any boat just by claiming it contains drugs.
Surely no country or organization would ever consider taking advantage of that. Right?
Surely no country or organization would ever consider taking advantage of that. Right?
Fresh words of wisdom from Trevor Noah. I always appreciate his perspective.
Take a listen.
Take a listen.
Saudi Comedy Festival, Charlie Kirk - Between the Scenes
YouTube video by Trevor Noah
youtu.be
October 9, 2025 at 2:29 AM
Fresh words of wisdom from Trevor Noah. I always appreciate his perspective.
Take a listen.
Take a listen.
By the 2nd book in the Remembrance of Earth’s Past trilogy (what Netflix’s The Three Body Problem is based on), I wondered why Rachel Carson’s book was such a big part of the first volume.
That became apparent in Death’s End. No happy endings for the universal silent spring.
#booksky #nospoilers
That became apparent in Death’s End. No happy endings for the universal silent spring.
#booksky #nospoilers
October 5, 2025 at 3:44 AM
By the 2nd book in the Remembrance of Earth’s Past trilogy (what Netflix’s The Three Body Problem is based on), I wondered why Rachel Carson’s book was such a big part of the first volume.
That became apparent in Death’s End. No happy endings for the universal silent spring.
#booksky #nospoilers
That became apparent in Death’s End. No happy endings for the universal silent spring.
#booksky #nospoilers
The Secret Handshake’s statue is back on the Mall, renamed from Best Friends Forever to Why Can’t We Be Friends.
They “released the files” to make those cake toppers available to #3dprint & I now have these clowns decorating my bathroom.
Unfortunately, the current president is facing my shower.
They “released the files” to make those cake toppers available to #3dprint & I now have these clowns decorating my bathroom.
Unfortunately, the current president is facing my shower.
October 3, 2025 at 5:17 PM
The Secret Handshake’s statue is back on the Mall, renamed from Best Friends Forever to Why Can’t We Be Friends.
They “released the files” to make those cake toppers available to #3dprint & I now have these clowns decorating my bathroom.
Unfortunately, the current president is facing my shower.
They “released the files” to make those cake toppers available to #3dprint & I now have these clowns decorating my bathroom.
Unfortunately, the current president is facing my shower.
One of these days I’ll get around to letting my procrastination catch up to me and there will be consequences.
October 2, 2025 at 12:25 PM
One of these days I’ll get around to letting my procrastination catch up to me and there will be consequences.
Not many movies I’ll give up on.
But Mickey 17… ugh.
Stuck in an airplane seat crossing the country, I quit the movie and watched the flight map instead.
But Mickey 17… ugh.
Stuck in an airplane seat crossing the country, I quit the movie and watched the flight map instead.
September 30, 2025 at 2:07 AM
Not many movies I’ll give up on.
But Mickey 17… ugh.
Stuck in an airplane seat crossing the country, I quit the movie and watched the flight map instead.
But Mickey 17… ugh.
Stuck in an airplane seat crossing the country, I quit the movie and watched the flight map instead.
With thanks to @williampetruzzo.com for his amazing series, I am proud to announce I have joined the revolution. If anyone needs me, I’ll be in the Jean Valjean with the door locked. #3dprinting #BigTissue #revolution
September 29, 2025 at 12:28 AM
With thanks to @williampetruzzo.com for his amazing series, I am proud to announce I have joined the revolution. If anyone needs me, I’ll be in the Jean Valjean with the door locked. #3dprinting #BigTissue #revolution
“How to Write Click-Bait YouTube Headlines. This Changes Everything!”
September 28, 2025 at 1:48 PM
“How to Write Click-Bait YouTube Headlines. This Changes Everything!”
Reposted by DasLyfe
Ever wonder how many men joined the priesthood just because they misunderstood the word seminary?
a priest is smiling and says `` tell me more my child ''
ALT: a priest is smiling and says `` tell me more my child ''
media.tenor.com
September 26, 2025 at 1:23 AM
Ever wonder how many men joined the priesthood just because they misunderstood the word seminary?
When will the right-wing media de-escalate escalate gate?
September 25, 2025 at 2:52 AM
When will the right-wing media de-escalate escalate gate?