Better a bargain body than a clearance-rack personality.
Besides, some of us prefer subtlety over… compensating for what one lacks.

Weak.

BEST PRIEST OF THE MONTH - SEPTEMBER 2025
J’erehmi 🎉🎉🎉
Congratulations for your success as top priest this month. We see your hard work and loyal committment to extreme secrecy.

Please report to the Chamber of the Oracle tomorrow at 9am for a special congratulatory breakfast banquet.

DO CRAFTS AT YOUR PLACE! MY THRALL LOOKS LIKE A DISCO BALL!

@deathdaddy.bsky.social You left glitter all over my custom-made marble breakfast table.

NO!!! I ABHOR GEMS!!!!

LAST THING YOU SEE BEFORE YOU PERISH

-wraps you in shadows like a badass-

Unlike *other* brutish Evanuris my temple requires a delicate hand and a vow to secrecy.
Also a lot of the people within 25 mi. are dead or have become rebels :(

…
…
…
…Have your servants remake my drink at once.

You’re not worthy of even being a staff member here. Leave or I take your spleen.

Elgar’nan, Sun-Tamer, General of the Enlightened Army, first among the Evanuris, ruler of Arlathan, who woke at the dawn of the elves.

Most of my priests are already scattered throughout my temple inside jars… And nobody wants to work for a god anymore.

I am out of ideas

Sorry I don’t talk to inferior beings.

Someone drank exactly 4 fl oz of my Pumpkin Spice Frappuccino Blended Beverage and none of my priests know anything about it…

You’re embarrassing…