Eliza Skinner - comedian
@elizaskinner.bsky.social
Comedian, writer, producer, ceramicist, slave to the rhythm (and my dog.)
Next pottery drop on Etsy: 8/12 9am PDT
BooBerryJones.etsy.com
Next pottery drop on Etsy: 8/12 9am PDT
BooBerryJones.etsy.com
Seeing that BOTH versions of the Johnny Lee Miller / Benedict Cumberbatch Frankenstein are streaming on the National Theater App made me exclaim “ooh!” in a way only a confirmed hermit can. Very mumbly and hoarse, through a thick beard and mustache - but excited!
November 22, 2025 at 1:35 AM
Seeing that BOTH versions of the Johnny Lee Miller / Benedict Cumberbatch Frankenstein are streaming on the National Theater App made me exclaim “ooh!” in a way only a confirmed hermit can. Very mumbly and hoarse, through a thick beard and mustache - but excited!
I have become a creepy pottery reply guy. Every time I see a post of a cool bowl I gotta comment something like “gorgeous”, “beautiful”, or “hello bowl, do you need a sugar daddy to spoil you, $7000 a week, no nudes”
November 21, 2025 at 1:44 AM
I have become a creepy pottery reply guy. Every time I see a post of a cool bowl I gotta comment something like “gorgeous”, “beautiful”, or “hello bowl, do you need a sugar daddy to spoil you, $7000 a week, no nudes”
Send in the perimenopausal neurodivergent women.
You think we haven’t been called names before?
You think we don’t talk back to powerful idiots? Even if it will cost us a job/career/citizenship??
Oh boy - FILL THE PLANE WITH US.
You think we haven’t been called names before?
You think we don’t talk back to powerful idiots? Even if it will cost us a job/career/citizenship??
Oh boy - FILL THE PLANE WITH US.
I’m not going to pretend it’s easy to say something in the moment when you witness the president do this and you’re aboard Air Force One with all the uniformed officers and secret service and fancy wood accents, but this is really an instance where you should. people.com/donald-trump...
Donald Trump Snaps at Female Reporter Who Asks About Epstein Files: 'Quiet Piggy'
Donald Trump Says 'Quiet Piggy' to Female Reporter Asking About Epstein Files
people.com
November 18, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Send in the perimenopausal neurodivergent women.
You think we haven’t been called names before?
You think we don’t talk back to powerful idiots? Even if it will cost us a job/career/citizenship??
Oh boy - FILL THE PLANE WITH US.
You think we haven’t been called names before?
You think we don’t talk back to powerful idiots? Even if it will cost us a job/career/citizenship??
Oh boy - FILL THE PLANE WITH US.
It’s 7pm in November so it’s midnight. See you in the spring, early evening!
November 17, 2025 at 3:00 AM
It’s 7pm in November so it’s midnight. See you in the spring, early evening!
LA DOGS - the rain is gonna be heavy today. Thunder starting in a few hours. Time to put on your headphones and get into your audiobooks. You’ll need peanut butter on deck. Dog be with you.
November 15, 2025 at 4:40 PM
LA DOGS - the rain is gonna be heavy today. Thunder starting in a few hours. Time to put on your headphones and get into your audiobooks. You’ll need peanut butter on deck. Dog be with you.
Me pitching to O Henry:
Ok, so the dog - he’s a very good dog, you know? Real good boy. But here’s the thing - he hates the rain. Can’t stand it. Refuses to go outside to potty. Instead he’s gonna wait it out. So he’s waiting all morning - because again, he’s a good boy. That’s important to him 1/2
Ok, so the dog - he’s a very good dog, you know? Real good boy. But here’s the thing - he hates the rain. Can’t stand it. Refuses to go outside to potty. Instead he’s gonna wait it out. So he’s waiting all morning - because again, he’s a good boy. That’s important to him 1/2
November 14, 2025 at 6:59 PM
Me pitching to O Henry:
Ok, so the dog - he’s a very good dog, you know? Real good boy. But here’s the thing - he hates the rain. Can’t stand it. Refuses to go outside to potty. Instead he’s gonna wait it out. So he’s waiting all morning - because again, he’s a good boy. That’s important to him 1/2
Ok, so the dog - he’s a very good dog, you know? Real good boy. But here’s the thing - he hates the rain. Can’t stand it. Refuses to go outside to potty. Instead he’s gonna wait it out. So he’s waiting all morning - because again, he’s a good boy. That’s important to him 1/2
Fuck the “bird” theory. That’s amateur hour! I’m going with the “when you tell me you traveled to another reality and back I will believe you” theory.
November 11, 2025 at 7:56 PM
Fuck the “bird” theory. That’s amateur hour! I’m going with the “when you tell me you traveled to another reality and back I will believe you” theory.
Upon this most recent rewatch, the most relatable parts of The Leftovers are the the absolutely batshit, intense, ✨meaningful✨ dream sequences.
Hands up, who is having Leftovers-style dreams these days?
Hands up, who is having Leftovers-style dreams these days?
November 8, 2025 at 2:40 AM
Upon this most recent rewatch, the most relatable parts of The Leftovers are the the absolutely batshit, intense, ✨meaningful✨ dream sequences.
Hands up, who is having Leftovers-style dreams these days?
Hands up, who is having Leftovers-style dreams these days?
There should be a scientific study of the women who get close to Elon Musk and want to fuck him more than they want to stab him in the neck. Either way you can definitely grab some cash on your way out the door, girl - may as well swing for the fences.
November 8, 2025 at 2:38 AM
There should be a scientific study of the women who get close to Elon Musk and want to fuck him more than they want to stab him in the neck. Either way you can definitely grab some cash on your way out the door, girl - may as well swing for the fences.
Also, here is a photo of a good grilled cheese I made with kimchi and a monster vase I made with stoneware clay.
November 8, 2025 at 2:33 AM
Also, here is a photo of a good grilled cheese I made with kimchi and a monster vase I made with stoneware clay.
Hahaha our Governor is a ski club bully taking a break from hazing frosh.
November 6, 2025 at 1:52 AM
Hahaha our Governor is a ski club bully taking a break from hazing frosh.
Feeling a lil depressy, decided to start a rewatch of the Leftovers. Keep your eye on this space for downdates!
November 2, 2025 at 4:33 PM
Feeling a lil depressy, decided to start a rewatch of the Leftovers. Keep your eye on this space for downdates!
Perimenopause should be a universally accepted legal defense.
“This woman kicked over her neighbor’s garbage can because it was left in the street for a week.”
“How do you plead?”
“Not Guilty Due To Perimenopause.”
“Case dismissed!”
“This woman kicked over her neighbor’s garbage can because it was left in the street for a week.”
“How do you plead?”
“Not Guilty Due To Perimenopause.”
“Case dismissed!”
November 2, 2025 at 6:05 AM
Perimenopause should be a universally accepted legal defense.
“This woman kicked over her neighbor’s garbage can because it was left in the street for a week.”
“How do you plead?”
“Not Guilty Due To Perimenopause.”
“Case dismissed!”
“This woman kicked over her neighbor’s garbage can because it was left in the street for a week.”
“How do you plead?”
“Not Guilty Due To Perimenopause.”
“Case dismissed!”
Just had to go to a party next door to ask them to please move their party inside (it was drunk screaming outside my bedroom window.) The response from the tenants was very respectful, but the response from the GenZ girl guests made me want to drop everything and devote my life to becoming a witch.
November 1, 2025 at 6:18 AM
Just had to go to a party next door to ask them to please move their party inside (it was drunk screaming outside my bedroom window.) The response from the tenants was very respectful, but the response from the GenZ girl guests made me want to drop everything and devote my life to becoming a witch.
I don’t get it, why don’t they put turn signals on Teslas or Porsches? If I was gonna pay that much for a car, I would definitely want it equipped with turn signals.
October 28, 2025 at 7:59 PM
I don’t get it, why don’t they put turn signals on Teslas or Porsches? If I was gonna pay that much for a car, I would definitely want it equipped with turn signals.
Hey, did you know that if you donate to @laist.com when you pick your “thank you” gift you can choose from options like providing meals to families in need or shelter animals? Check out just a few of these options. Fund public local media!
October 23, 2025 at 3:01 PM
Hey, did you know that if you donate to @laist.com when you pick your “thank you” gift you can choose from options like providing meals to families in need or shelter animals? Check out just a few of these options. Fund public local media!
Every time I forget to limit my replies I get nothing but asshole replies.
October 22, 2025 at 1:42 AM
Every time I forget to limit my replies I get nothing but asshole replies.
What happened to just shrugging your shoulders at people who seem weird to you? If we all just rolled our eyes and kept it moving - and let people live their freaky little lives in peace - we could all be happy!
Make America “Ok, whatever” Again.
Make America “Ok, whatever” Again.
October 20, 2025 at 7:17 PM
What happened to just shrugging your shoulders at people who seem weird to you? If we all just rolled our eyes and kept it moving - and let people live their freaky little lives in peace - we could all be happy!
Make America “Ok, whatever” Again.
Make America “Ok, whatever” Again.
If you are tempted to get mad at me for my last post, you should know that my cat just kissed me on the lips so I think we’re married now. Is it really worth arguing with me?
October 20, 2025 at 4:02 AM
If you are tempted to get mad at me for my last post, you should know that my cat just kissed me on the lips so I think we’re married now. Is it really worth arguing with me?
One of the weirdest ideas going around is that immigrants are here getting free healthcare. But… we don’t have that here. If that was idea they would truck on through and get to Canada or Mexico. We are the LEAST attractive system available. It’s like saying they are stealing our magic wands.
October 20, 2025 at 4:00 AM
One of the weirdest ideas going around is that immigrants are here getting free healthcare. But… we don’t have that here. If that was idea they would truck on through and get to Canada or Mexico. We are the LEAST attractive system available. It’s like saying they are stealing our magic wands.
“Let’s hang out soon - grab coffee or something. I actually mean it, lol!”
WHAT?!? I NEVER DONT MEAN IT. EVERY TIME, I ALWAYS MEAN IT. OTHERWISE I WILL SAY “it was nice to see/hear from you!” Or “Well… where did you park?” Or “cool shoes! Bye bye! Tell your cat hi from me!”
WHAT?!? I NEVER DONT MEAN IT. EVERY TIME, I ALWAYS MEAN IT. OTHERWISE I WILL SAY “it was nice to see/hear from you!” Or “Well… where did you park?” Or “cool shoes! Bye bye! Tell your cat hi from me!”
October 20, 2025 at 3:20 AM
“Let’s hang out soon - grab coffee or something. I actually mean it, lol!”
WHAT?!? I NEVER DONT MEAN IT. EVERY TIME, I ALWAYS MEAN IT. OTHERWISE I WILL SAY “it was nice to see/hear from you!” Or “Well… where did you park?” Or “cool shoes! Bye bye! Tell your cat hi from me!”
WHAT?!? I NEVER DONT MEAN IT. EVERY TIME, I ALWAYS MEAN IT. OTHERWISE I WILL SAY “it was nice to see/hear from you!” Or “Well… where did you park?” Or “cool shoes! Bye bye! Tell your cat hi from me!”
Little old ladies at the protests are breaking me. I love them so much. These are the same women who have been protesting for just causes for decades and they’re still going.
October 18, 2025 at 9:55 PM
Little old ladies at the protests are breaking me. I love them so much. These are the same women who have been protesting for just causes for decades and they’re still going.
JD Vance seems to be making more public appearances recently. I have to assume it is to remind the public that he has the energy of a dude who corners you at a party to ask (with thick, gummy, catshit breath) why you don’t like him - tearfully begs you to kiss him - then calls you a bitch.
October 17, 2025 at 3:34 AM
JD Vance seems to be making more public appearances recently. I have to assume it is to remind the public that he has the energy of a dude who corners you at a party to ask (with thick, gummy, catshit breath) why you don’t like him - tearfully begs you to kiss him - then calls you a bitch.
This should be the absolute BEST time of year (2 more weeks of Spooky Season, then Vince Guaraldi Season begins). But this violent, racist, classist, misogynist administration has been DESTROYING it with - what I am calling - their War On Spooky Season.
October 17, 2025 at 3:29 AM
This should be the absolute BEST time of year (2 more weeks of Spooky Season, then Vince Guaraldi Season begins). But this violent, racist, classist, misogynist administration has been DESTROYING it with - what I am calling - their War On Spooky Season.