Evan M. Bedford
@evanmbedford.bsky.social
Writer of both poetry and prose
Influenced by: H. P. Lovecraft, Edgar Allan Poe
Influenced by: H. P. Lovecraft, Edgar Allan Poe
A lack of connection.
My purpose in life
is depleted.
An opportunity
that is as if deleted.
Feelings that have receded.
By false optimism I was greeted.
An opportunity
that is uprooted.
My purpose in life
is depleted.
An opportunity
that is as if deleted.
Feelings that have receded.
By false optimism I was greeted.
An opportunity
that is uprooted.
November 26, 2025 at 4:21 AM
A lack of connection.
My purpose in life
is depleted.
An opportunity
that is as if deleted.
Feelings that have receded.
By false optimism I was greeted.
An opportunity
that is uprooted.
My purpose in life
is depleted.
An opportunity
that is as if deleted.
Feelings that have receded.
By false optimism I was greeted.
An opportunity
that is uprooted.
November 25, 2025 at 8:06 PM
A dream that has nestled
into my reality.
Shattering everything that
I recognize to be.
Leaving nothing for
my eyes to see.
Leaving nothing for
my mind to conceive.
There is near nothingness.
That is accompanied only
by an incessant horror
that will never leave.
#poetry
into my reality.
Shattering everything that
I recognize to be.
Leaving nothing for
my eyes to see.
Leaving nothing for
my mind to conceive.
There is near nothingness.
That is accompanied only
by an incessant horror
that will never leave.
#poetry
November 25, 2025 at 7:58 PM
A dream that has nestled
into my reality.
Shattering everything that
I recognize to be.
Leaving nothing for
my eyes to see.
Leaving nothing for
my mind to conceive.
There is near nothingness.
That is accompanied only
by an incessant horror
that will never leave.
#poetry
into my reality.
Shattering everything that
I recognize to be.
Leaving nothing for
my eyes to see.
Leaving nothing for
my mind to conceive.
There is near nothingness.
That is accompanied only
by an incessant horror
that will never leave.
#poetry
My existence is torment.
Intrusive thoughts
of vile things.
I am haunted
by false rememberings.
Internal suffering.
Only torment—
does my existence bring.
In my mind is only pain.
Left lingering.
Intrusive thoughts
of vile things.
I am haunted
by false rememberings.
Internal suffering.
Only torment—
does my existence bring.
In my mind is only pain.
Left lingering.
November 24, 2025 at 7:30 AM
My existence is torment.
Intrusive thoughts
of vile things.
I am haunted
by false rememberings.
Internal suffering.
Only torment—
does my existence bring.
In my mind is only pain.
Left lingering.
Intrusive thoughts
of vile things.
I am haunted
by false rememberings.
Internal suffering.
Only torment—
does my existence bring.
In my mind is only pain.
Left lingering.
November 24, 2025 at 1:20 AM
Thoughts that have
been obscured.
Altered by time.
Thoughts that evoke
a sense of unsettling horror.
Plagued with
uncertainty and doubt.
Thoughts that differ
from memories,
because that would imply
that they ever happened.
been obscured.
Altered by time.
Thoughts that evoke
a sense of unsettling horror.
Plagued with
uncertainty and doubt.
Thoughts that differ
from memories,
because that would imply
that they ever happened.
November 23, 2025 at 9:14 AM
Thoughts that have
been obscured.
Altered by time.
Thoughts that evoke
a sense of unsettling horror.
Plagued with
uncertainty and doubt.
Thoughts that differ
from memories,
because that would imply
that they ever happened.
been obscured.
Altered by time.
Thoughts that evoke
a sense of unsettling horror.
Plagued with
uncertainty and doubt.
Thoughts that differ
from memories,
because that would imply
that they ever happened.
I feed off your tears.
I am fed by the result
of my cruelty.
All that I know
is torment.
I am only here for you—
to render your many
breaths to only a few.
Your own blood
will be your final view.
I am fed by the result
of my cruelty.
All that I know
is torment.
I am only here for you—
to render your many
breaths to only a few.
Your own blood
will be your final view.
November 22, 2025 at 6:32 AM
I feed off your tears.
I am fed by the result
of my cruelty.
All that I know
is torment.
I am only here for you—
to render your many
breaths to only a few.
Your own blood
will be your final view.
I am fed by the result
of my cruelty.
All that I know
is torment.
I am only here for you—
to render your many
breaths to only a few.
Your own blood
will be your final view.
Nothing is good
enough for me.
I cannot relax,
and I feel that the mirror
is looking back at me.
As if it sees what I see.
As if it knows me.
Potentially better
than I know myself.
As if it knows what I love.
As if it knows what I don't.
#poetry
enough for me.
I cannot relax,
and I feel that the mirror
is looking back at me.
As if it sees what I see.
As if it knows me.
Potentially better
than I know myself.
As if it knows what I love.
As if it knows what I don't.
#poetry
November 21, 2025 at 5:04 AM
Nothing is good
enough for me.
I cannot relax,
and I feel that the mirror
is looking back at me.
As if it sees what I see.
As if it knows me.
Potentially better
than I know myself.
As if it knows what I love.
As if it knows what I don't.
#poetry
enough for me.
I cannot relax,
and I feel that the mirror
is looking back at me.
As if it sees what I see.
As if it knows me.
Potentially better
than I know myself.
As if it knows what I love.
As if it knows what I don't.
#poetry
We are not nothing.
We are just up in the air.
An opportunity
that is merely floating.
Levitating there.
Not taken upon,
but not neglected.
We are energy that
has not been properly
directed.
A love that is
soon to be reflected.
Two auras that
will become one,
once they are connected.
#poetry
We are just up in the air.
An opportunity
that is merely floating.
Levitating there.
Not taken upon,
but not neglected.
We are energy that
has not been properly
directed.
A love that is
soon to be reflected.
Two auras that
will become one,
once they are connected.
#poetry
November 21, 2025 at 1:52 AM
We are not nothing.
We are just up in the air.
An opportunity
that is merely floating.
Levitating there.
Not taken upon,
but not neglected.
We are energy that
has not been properly
directed.
A love that is
soon to be reflected.
Two auras that
will become one,
once they are connected.
#poetry
We are just up in the air.
An opportunity
that is merely floating.
Levitating there.
Not taken upon,
but not neglected.
We are energy that
has not been properly
directed.
A love that is
soon to be reflected.
Two auras that
will become one,
once they are connected.
#poetry
I am the one
that the leader left.
No matter what
good they saw in me.
I proved to be too
awful for their company.
I am the
abandoned.
I have been forced
to find a way.
For me to choose
to lead myself.
#poetry
that the leader left.
No matter what
good they saw in me.
I proved to be too
awful for their company.
I am the
abandoned.
I have been forced
to find a way.
For me to choose
to lead myself.
#poetry
November 21, 2025 at 1:39 AM
I am the one
that the leader left.
No matter what
good they saw in me.
I proved to be too
awful for their company.
I am the
abandoned.
I have been forced
to find a way.
For me to choose
to lead myself.
#poetry
that the leader left.
No matter what
good they saw in me.
I proved to be too
awful for their company.
I am the
abandoned.
I have been forced
to find a way.
For me to choose
to lead myself.
#poetry
I see empathy in her eyes.
I see sympathy in her eyes.
I see guilt in her eyes.
Her eyes are why
I felt so comfortable.
Then the comfort that
she provided me—
vanished.
Even without it—
I still feel affection for her.
I see sympathy in her eyes.
I see guilt in her eyes.
Her eyes are why
I felt so comfortable.
Then the comfort that
she provided me—
vanished.
Even without it—
I still feel affection for her.
November 18, 2025 at 10:44 AM
I see empathy in her eyes.
I see sympathy in her eyes.
I see guilt in her eyes.
Her eyes are why
I felt so comfortable.
Then the comfort that
she provided me—
vanished.
Even without it—
I still feel affection for her.
I see sympathy in her eyes.
I see guilt in her eyes.
Her eyes are why
I felt so comfortable.
Then the comfort that
she provided me—
vanished.
Even without it—
I still feel affection for her.
November 18, 2025 at 2:25 AM
November 15, 2025 at 8:40 PM
I have exposed
myself to what is.
I have exposed
myself to this reality.
To the circumstance of
being unknown.
A despair stricken
representation of near nothing.
That is lost in
a luster of delusion.
Near nothingness.
#poetry
myself to what is.
I have exposed
myself to this reality.
To the circumstance of
being unknown.
A despair stricken
representation of near nothing.
That is lost in
a luster of delusion.
Near nothingness.
#poetry
November 14, 2025 at 3:47 AM
I have exposed
myself to what is.
I have exposed
myself to this reality.
To the circumstance of
being unknown.
A despair stricken
representation of near nothing.
That is lost in
a luster of delusion.
Near nothingness.
#poetry
myself to what is.
I have exposed
myself to this reality.
To the circumstance of
being unknown.
A despair stricken
representation of near nothing.
That is lost in
a luster of delusion.
Near nothingness.
#poetry
I cannot see her
with anyone else—
other than with me.
I am to see
her die alone.
If not with her,
next to me.
Tragically,
and unhappily.
#poetry
with anyone else—
other than with me.
I am to see
her die alone.
If not with her,
next to me.
Tragically,
and unhappily.
#poetry
November 13, 2025 at 3:29 AM
I cannot see her
with anyone else—
other than with me.
I am to see
her die alone.
If not with her,
next to me.
Tragically,
and unhappily.
#poetry
with anyone else—
other than with me.
I am to see
her die alone.
If not with her,
next to me.
Tragically,
and unhappily.
#poetry
November 10, 2025 at 11:52 PM
November 9, 2025 at 12:51 AM
Every word I have
written has you
referenced there.
The one to which I wanted
to provide my love and care.
A surreal sight—
that is beyond ordinaire.
A surreal sight—
at which I would often stare.
#poetry
written has you
referenced there.
The one to which I wanted
to provide my love and care.
A surreal sight—
that is beyond ordinaire.
A surreal sight—
at which I would often stare.
#poetry
November 7, 2025 at 2:28 AM
Every word I have
written has you
referenced there.
The one to which I wanted
to provide my love and care.
A surreal sight—
that is beyond ordinaire.
A surreal sight—
at which I would often stare.
#poetry
written has you
referenced there.
The one to which I wanted
to provide my love and care.
A surreal sight—
that is beyond ordinaire.
A surreal sight—
at which I would often stare.
#poetry
I beg and I plead.
Sure that it is you that
I need.
For you
and only you—
I continue to bleed.
These words are not more
abstract than they seem.
I say what I mean.
You refused my love—
that was only kind and clean.
Deprived of what is
beautiful and lean.
#poetry
Sure that it is you that
I need.
For you
and only you—
I continue to bleed.
These words are not more
abstract than they seem.
I say what I mean.
You refused my love—
that was only kind and clean.
Deprived of what is
beautiful and lean.
#poetry
November 5, 2025 at 9:12 PM
I beg and I plead.
Sure that it is you that
I need.
For you
and only you—
I continue to bleed.
These words are not more
abstract than they seem.
I say what I mean.
You refused my love—
that was only kind and clean.
Deprived of what is
beautiful and lean.
#poetry
Sure that it is you that
I need.
For you
and only you—
I continue to bleed.
These words are not more
abstract than they seem.
I say what I mean.
You refused my love—
that was only kind and clean.
Deprived of what is
beautiful and lean.
#poetry
November 3, 2025 at 8:16 PM
I’m sorry for thinking
that I was special to you.
I’m sorry for thinking
that you remembered things
about me that made me unique.
The way that
I remembered you.
I’m sorry for thinking
that I would be accepted into
your life, and that your family
would become mine.
that I was special to you.
I’m sorry for thinking
that you remembered things
about me that made me unique.
The way that
I remembered you.
I’m sorry for thinking
that I would be accepted into
your life, and that your family
would become mine.
November 3, 2025 at 7:34 PM
I’m sorry for thinking
that I was special to you.
I’m sorry for thinking
that you remembered things
about me that made me unique.
The way that
I remembered you.
I’m sorry for thinking
that I would be accepted into
your life, and that your family
would become mine.
that I was special to you.
I’m sorry for thinking
that you remembered things
about me that made me unique.
The way that
I remembered you.
I’m sorry for thinking
that I would be accepted into
your life, and that your family
would become mine.
I find that fake things
don't bring me
solace anymore.
And I only wanted you to be real.
I am left in the emptiness
of what I’ve realized is not.
All of which I've
wished to have forgotten.
don't bring me
solace anymore.
And I only wanted you to be real.
I am left in the emptiness
of what I’ve realized is not.
All of which I've
wished to have forgotten.
November 2, 2025 at 8:46 PM
I find that fake things
don't bring me
solace anymore.
And I only wanted you to be real.
I am left in the emptiness
of what I’ve realized is not.
All of which I've
wished to have forgotten.
don't bring me
solace anymore.
And I only wanted you to be real.
I am left in the emptiness
of what I’ve realized is not.
All of which I've
wished to have forgotten.
I have to change.
I have to not only
tell you that I have,
but I have to show you.
You are more important
to me than anyone.
I have to match your
energy in a way
that I never have before.
I have to give you
the patience that you deserve.
#poetry
I have to not only
tell you that I have,
but I have to show you.
You are more important
to me than anyone.
I have to match your
energy in a way
that I never have before.
I have to give you
the patience that you deserve.
#poetry
October 30, 2025 at 11:27 PM
I have to change.
I have to not only
tell you that I have,
but I have to show you.
You are more important
to me than anyone.
I have to match your
energy in a way
that I never have before.
I have to give you
the patience that you deserve.
#poetry
I have to not only
tell you that I have,
but I have to show you.
You are more important
to me than anyone.
I have to match your
energy in a way
that I never have before.
I have to give you
the patience that you deserve.
#poetry
What is truth?
What is delusion?
I am being denied—
of my inclusion.
She has harmed my mind.
She has harmed my heart.
I am not wanting of
suffering a failure—
as if a taste that is tart.
#poetry
What is delusion?
I am being denied—
of my inclusion.
She has harmed my mind.
She has harmed my heart.
I am not wanting of
suffering a failure—
as if a taste that is tart.
#poetry
October 29, 2025 at 8:23 PM
What is truth?
What is delusion?
I am being denied—
of my inclusion.
She has harmed my mind.
She has harmed my heart.
I am not wanting of
suffering a failure—
as if a taste that is tart.
#poetry
What is delusion?
I am being denied—
of my inclusion.
She has harmed my mind.
She has harmed my heart.
I am not wanting of
suffering a failure—
as if a taste that is tart.
#poetry
I often remember her.
I hold thoughts of her dear.
Though she has become
the one that I most fear.
I fear that if I am to approach her
she will run off like a deer.
She is nearly unlovable.
She is ambiguous and unclear.
I hold thoughts of her dear.
Though she has become
the one that I most fear.
I fear that if I am to approach her
she will run off like a deer.
She is nearly unlovable.
She is ambiguous and unclear.
October 29, 2025 at 12:45 AM
I often remember her.
I hold thoughts of her dear.
Though she has become
the one that I most fear.
I fear that if I am to approach her
she will run off like a deer.
She is nearly unlovable.
She is ambiguous and unclear.
I hold thoughts of her dear.
Though she has become
the one that I most fear.
I fear that if I am to approach her
she will run off like a deer.
She is nearly unlovable.
She is ambiguous and unclear.