Sarah M
@fancypance.bsky.social
Indianapolis, because you’ve got to live somewhere.
I have a new boss, and though he’s not perfect, he always seems delighted to see me. Friends, it is a huge morale booster.
Makes me want to be more expressive when I meet and greet.
Makes me want to be more expressive when I meet and greet.
January 7, 2026 at 9:04 PM
I have a new boss, and though he’s not perfect, he always seems delighted to see me. Friends, it is a huge morale booster.
Makes me want to be more expressive when I meet and greet.
Makes me want to be more expressive when I meet and greet.
I have worked here for 18.5 years. I was catching up with a coworker who started the same day as me. In a single conversation she asked if I was retiring soon AND if I’m planning to have a baby. I am too middle aged for both!
January 6, 2026 at 4:09 PM
I have worked here for 18.5 years. I was catching up with a coworker who started the same day as me. In a single conversation she asked if I was retiring soon AND if I’m planning to have a baby. I am too middle aged for both!
At work. Someone asks if I can “help” them do a project and what they mean is…do everything.
Please stop using the word help in this context.
Please stop using the word help in this context.
January 2, 2026 at 6:09 PM
At work. Someone asks if I can “help” them do a project and what they mean is…do everything.
Please stop using the word help in this context.
Please stop using the word help in this context.
I am cracking myself up thinking of 2026 resolutions for others. Our dogs should resolve to stop licking themselves so much.
And on a more serious note, I would love for people to resolve to come over and play games with us, and for us to volunteer together, and for us to try new restaurants.
And on a more serious note, I would love for people to resolve to come over and play games with us, and for us to volunteer together, and for us to try new restaurants.
January 1, 2026 at 9:41 PM
I am cracking myself up thinking of 2026 resolutions for others. Our dogs should resolve to stop licking themselves so much.
And on a more serious note, I would love for people to resolve to come over and play games with us, and for us to volunteer together, and for us to try new restaurants.
And on a more serious note, I would love for people to resolve to come over and play games with us, and for us to volunteer together, and for us to try new restaurants.
To be fair, the only time I’ve apologized for being white is when I say I’m so sorry white people like this exist.
JD Vance: "In the United States of America you don't have to apologize for being white anymore"
December 29, 2025 at 6:24 PM
To be fair, the only time I’ve apologized for being white is when I say I’m so sorry white people like this exist.
Houseguests: love to see them coming, love to see them going. Whew, I am ready to start the guestless phase of the holiday.
December 27, 2025 at 3:04 PM
Houseguests: love to see them coming, love to see them going. Whew, I am ready to start the guestless phase of the holiday.
I don’t watch It’s A Wonderful Life anymore because the message seems to be that no one will show up for you until you’re ready to jump off a bridge to your death.
December 25, 2025 at 1:39 PM
I don’t watch It’s A Wonderful Life anymore because the message seems to be that no one will show up for you until you’re ready to jump off a bridge to your death.
“He only weighed two pounds at birth,” says my father in law who is peppering in random facts about the grandson of a cemetery keeper in Grayville who is a geology student. I have no idea why we are hearing about these people.
December 24, 2025 at 12:32 PM
“He only weighed two pounds at birth,” says my father in law who is peppering in random facts about the grandson of a cemetery keeper in Grayville who is a geology student. I have no idea why we are hearing about these people.
I have been on a real run of DNFs from Libby this week. The books all just seem like "storys" that read like simple little movies. I need some literary in my fiction, I suppose. The Road to Tender Hearts, All Adults Here, I forget what else.
December 18, 2025 at 2:21 AM
I have been on a real run of DNFs from Libby this week. The books all just seem like "storys" that read like simple little movies. I need some literary in my fiction, I suppose. The Road to Tender Hearts, All Adults Here, I forget what else.
What’s bothering me about the Reiners is that one of them probably had to watch the other die.
December 15, 2025 at 10:05 PM
What’s bothering me about the Reiners is that one of them probably had to watch the other die.
Somehow I’m on “are audiobooks reading?” TikTok and this is the most pointless debate since “is a hot dog a sandwich?”
December 12, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Somehow I’m on “are audiobooks reading?” TikTok and this is the most pointless debate since “is a hot dog a sandwich?”
This arrived today. IYKYK.
December 12, 2025 at 12:26 AM
This arrived today. IYKYK.
I don't even know how I would go about watching a Hallmark Christmas movie and that's perfectly OK.
December 8, 2025 at 2:19 AM
I don't even know how I would go about watching a Hallmark Christmas movie and that's perfectly OK.
Perhaps a dystopian novel audiobook wasn't the right choice on a cold dreary day.
I'm counteracting it with Ina Garten's brownie pudding.
I'm counteracting it with Ina Garten's brownie pudding.
December 7, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Perhaps a dystopian novel audiobook wasn't the right choice on a cold dreary day.
I'm counteracting it with Ina Garten's brownie pudding.
I'm counteracting it with Ina Garten's brownie pudding.
Had to go to the Xfinity store in Avon and it smelled like bad cologne and farts. The clerk who helped us noticed my husband's menthol cough drop breath. So I'm sure the clerk smelled the farts and cologne too. Poor guy. I'm giving him 10/10 on the feedback survey.
November 23, 2025 at 8:43 PM
Had to go to the Xfinity store in Avon and it smelled like bad cologne and farts. The clerk who helped us noticed my husband's menthol cough drop breath. So I'm sure the clerk smelled the farts and cologne too. Poor guy. I'm giving him 10/10 on the feedback survey.
At the age where I see long lost classmates and I can't tell whether the kids in their photos are their children or grandchildren.
November 23, 2025 at 3:04 PM
At the age where I see long lost classmates and I can't tell whether the kids in their photos are their children or grandchildren.
Just got back from NYC and have learned of the only acceptable use of listening to music/video without headphones in public.
November 14, 2025 at 9:46 PM
Just got back from NYC and have learned of the only acceptable use of listening to music/video without headphones in public.
Considering restarting the "invite everyone we know" Sunday brunches. I feel like we need a hook though, and maybe opening this bad boy from my in-laws house after 40 years is just the thing.
November 2, 2025 at 4:07 PM
Considering restarting the "invite everyone we know" Sunday brunches. I feel like we need a hook though, and maybe opening this bad boy from my in-laws house after 40 years is just the thing.
I've long been a believer in "no is a complete sentence" but am finally living the advice of "you don't have to respond every question you're asked."
At my volunteer gig this morning a church group was also there and one asked everyone "what church to do you go to?!"
Nope.
At my volunteer gig this morning a church group was also there and one asked everyone "what church to do you go to?!"
Nope.
November 1, 2025 at 10:47 PM
I've long been a believer in "no is a complete sentence" but am finally living the advice of "you don't have to respond every question you're asked."
At my volunteer gig this morning a church group was also there and one asked everyone "what church to do you go to?!"
Nope.
At my volunteer gig this morning a church group was also there and one asked everyone "what church to do you go to?!"
Nope.
54 kids in total tonight. Next year I'm leaning in to the Little Debbie Cosmic Brownie. They went fast.
Here is what they selected:
12 Cosmic Brownies
11 Twix
9 Star Crunch
7 Snickers
6 plain M&M
5 Milky Way
4 peanut M&M
Here is what they selected:
12 Cosmic Brownies
11 Twix
9 Star Crunch
7 Snickers
6 plain M&M
5 Milky Way
4 peanut M&M
November 1, 2025 at 1:25 AM
54 kids in total tonight. Next year I'm leaning in to the Little Debbie Cosmic Brownie. They went fast.
Here is what they selected:
12 Cosmic Brownies
11 Twix
9 Star Crunch
7 Snickers
6 plain M&M
5 Milky Way
4 peanut M&M
Here is what they selected:
12 Cosmic Brownies
11 Twix
9 Star Crunch
7 Snickers
6 plain M&M
5 Milky Way
4 peanut M&M
Today someone stormed down to my office and tried to prove to me that we should implement the very process I was proposing, had they only read it. They also had bad breath and sweat stink and I feel I should be entitled to compensation.
October 24, 2025 at 9:40 PM
Today someone stormed down to my office and tried to prove to me that we should implement the very process I was proposing, had they only read it. They also had bad breath and sweat stink and I feel I should be entitled to compensation.
Today I was surprised to learn that the now-iconic inflatable frog costume is in stock and available for purchase. Tempting.
October 18, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Today I was surprised to learn that the now-iconic inflatable frog costume is in stock and available for purchase. Tempting.
Do you ever just want to apologize to (and thank) anyone who could stand to be your friend when you were a dumb young person?
October 15, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Do you ever just want to apologize to (and thank) anyone who could stand to be your friend when you were a dumb young person?
Stan is at Tonic Ball practice so the dogs and I are listening to Tupac.
October 15, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Stan is at Tonic Ball practice so the dogs and I are listening to Tupac.