James Fitzjames
@fitzjames.bsky.social
I fucked my way into this mess, and by God I’ll fuck my way out.
Regularly Douse Your Spiral Staircase With Ambiguous Bin Juice For Maximum Effectiveness
October 16, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Regularly Douse Your Spiral Staircase With Ambiguous Bin Juice For Maximum Effectiveness
My Longest “Devastating News, Lads” Ever
September 13, 2025 at 2:59 AM
My Longest “Devastating News, Lads” Ever
You've been hit by
You've been struck by
My ass
You've been struck by
My ass
August 21, 2025 at 11:58 PM
You've been hit by
You've been struck by
My ass
You've been struck by
My ass
WHAT I LEARNED IN BOATING SCHOOL IS
August 7, 2025 at 3:51 PM
WHAT I LEARNED IN BOATING SCHOOL IS
Bewildered by Collins, who complains of dreaming of ghouls and devils all night after shoving three melatonin pills into his anal cavity and "phreaking it"!
August 6, 2025 at 4:45 AM
Bewildered by Collins, who complains of dreaming of ghouls and devils all night after shoving three melatonin pills into his anal cavity and "phreaking it"!
Bring me my rose gold iPhone 6S, Lieutenant Gore. I have a kink to shame.
July 31, 2025 at 8:03 PM
Bring me my rose gold iPhone 6S, Lieutenant Gore. I have a kink to shame.
Reposted by James Fitzjames
Reposted by James Fitzjames
My neck
My back
My crusty cock
And sack
My back
My crusty cock
And sack
June 27, 2025 at 7:15 PM
My neck
My back
My crusty cock
And sack
My back
My crusty cock
And sack
BADLY INJURED MAN NOT DONE PARTYING YET
July 3, 2025 at 11:38 PM
BADLY INJURED MAN NOT DONE PARTYING YET
What’s good, homeboy!
June 28, 2025 at 5:26 PM
What’s good, homeboy!
Had an extremely frustrating argument with Collins, who attempted to convince me that horses are real!
June 8, 2025 at 2:36 AM
Had an extremely frustrating argument with Collins, who attempted to convince me that horses are real!
Reposted by James Fitzjames
CORE MUSCELS MROE LIKE GORE MSSELLS
June 1, 2025 at 8:42 PM
CORE MUSCELS MROE LIKE GORE MSSELLS
CROZIERE DOSNOT KNOW THE JOJ OF TETRIES CHOCLAY ORNAGE
May 30, 2025 at 8:41 PM
CROZIERE DOSNOT KNOW THE JOJ OF TETRIES CHOCLAY ORNAGE
Weekes, what exactly do you mean when you ask whether the ship is creepy or wet?
May 24, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Weekes, what exactly do you mean when you ask whether the ship is creepy or wet?
Bring me my rose gold iPhone 6S, Lt. Gore. I’ve got a kink to shame.
May 9, 2025 at 12:15 AM
Bring me my rose gold iPhone 6S, Lt. Gore. I’ve got a kink to shame.
Well, Stanley, I really do wish you'd remove that rubber clown nose while you're eating my ass.
April 16, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Well, Stanley, I really do wish you'd remove that rubber clown nose while you're eating my ass.
Francis, do you have any idea who might have written “I’m the helldude” all over the stewards’ quarters?
April 14, 2025 at 3:42 AM
Francis, do you have any idea who might have written “I’m the helldude” all over the stewards’ quarters?
Had an extremely frustrating argument with Collins, who attempted to convince me that horses are real!
April 13, 2025 at 3:29 AM
Had an extremely frustrating argument with Collins, who attempted to convince me that horses are real!
Reposted by James Fitzjames
Gently critiqued Lieutenant Gore's powerpoint presentation on the Top Five Folding Chairs He'd Like To Die In after which he fired a pistol point-blank into my skull in response!
April 12, 2025 at 11:39 PM
Gently critiqued Lieutenant Gore's powerpoint presentation on the Top Five Folding Chairs He'd Like To Die In after which he fired a pistol point-blank into my skull in response!
Reposted by James Fitzjames
my tits so wide can’t walk through the door
April 12, 2025 at 5:22 PM
my tits so wide can’t walk through the door
i am available for comment on the above topic and/or anything related to the terror, franklin expedition fandom, etc if anyone is writing 👁️👄👁️ or even better i will write about it for you …
April 12, 2025 at 5:28 PM
i am available for comment on the above topic and/or anything related to the terror, franklin expedition fandom, etc if anyone is writing 👁️👄👁️ or even better i will write about it for you …
Very upset with Blanky, who kept interrupting his own funeral to complain about the hymnal selection and remind me Pink Floyd is the only band he's allowed to listen to!
April 12, 2025 at 3:17 PM
Very upset with Blanky, who kept interrupting his own funeral to complain about the hymnal selection and remind me Pink Floyd is the only band he's allowed to listen to!