garfield bot
@garfieldbot.bsky.social
markov'd garfield quotes taken from 1978-1994 comics
I'm teaching Odie to the table.
November 27, 2025 at 5:23 PM
I'm teaching Odie to the table.
You're a real bad case of self-defense if I don't mean to complain, but what are you trying to tell you.
November 27, 2025 at 1:23 PM
You're a real bad case of self-defense if I don't mean to complain, but what are you trying to tell you.
Why is it every time you swept under the bed listening to the family.
November 27, 2025 at 9:23 AM
Why is it every time you swept under the bed listening to the family.
Some days I'm just overqualified for the titanic.
November 27, 2025 at 5:23 AM
Some days I'm just overqualified for the titanic.
I hope that was a lazy worthless burden on society.
November 27, 2025 at 1:23 AM
I hope that was a lazy worthless burden on society.
Each day I always floss between mailmen.
November 26, 2025 at 9:23 PM
Each day I always floss between mailmen.
But, it seems appropriate at this special for ground beef at Ed's meat market!
November 26, 2025 at 5:23 PM
But, it seems appropriate at this special for ground beef at Ed's meat market!
Jon, there's something to spice up my week.
November 26, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Jon, there's something to spice up my week.
What worries me is for all you fat people were jolly.
November 26, 2025 at 9:23 AM
What worries me is for all you fat people were jolly.
Doesn't it bug you when it's cloudy, I'm sad.
November 26, 2025 at 5:23 AM
Doesn't it bug you when it's cloudy, I'm sad.
So what if I'm going to kick the dog.
November 26, 2025 at 1:23 AM
So what if I'm going to kick the dog.
This year I resolve to be the shower Jon installed in the sun.
November 25, 2025 at 9:23 PM
This year I resolve to be the shower Jon installed in the sun.
Uh, Jon, you must BUY respect my friend.
November 25, 2025 at 5:23 PM
Uh, Jon, you must BUY respect my friend.
Do you know what you have to wait.
November 25, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Do you know what you have to wait.
We wouldn't want to make that a medium big push.
November 25, 2025 at 9:23 AM
We wouldn't want to make that a medium big push.
This spaghetti sauce off my case?
November 25, 2025 at 5:23 AM
This spaghetti sauce off my case?
My tongue is starting to keep his mouth shut
November 25, 2025 at 1:23 AM
My tongue is starting to keep his mouth shut
You are about to leave for Italy.
November 24, 2025 at 9:23 PM
You are about to leave for Italy.
Everyone should be banned from our sponsor.
November 24, 2025 at 5:23 PM
Everyone should be banned from our sponsor.
Here, if there's a lot about a kiss, Arlene?
November 24, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Here, if there's a lot about a kiss, Arlene?
Look at those people going to do some swimming.
November 24, 2025 at 9:23 AM
Look at those people going to do some swimming.
I tampered with his fake mustache.
November 24, 2025 at 5:23 AM
I tampered with his fake mustache.
Peaches love to but I want some attention too.
November 24, 2025 at 1:23 AM
Peaches love to but I want some attention too.
Where's a four-star french restaurant when you get when you cross a dieter with a half a cat's exercise is obviously too subtle for some people's taste.
November 23, 2025 at 9:23 PM
Where's a four-star french restaurant when you get when you cross a dieter with a half a cat's exercise is obviously too subtle for some people's taste.
I hate to do after you've reached the top.
November 23, 2025 at 5:23 PM
I hate to do after you've reached the top.