Being Broken - living with CPTSD
@geoffreyrjonas.ca
Personal journal about living with CPTSD from life-long psychological abuse of parents with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
"Being Broken", my memoir about survival and death from Narcissistic Parental Abuse, is available here:
https://a.co/d/6AvDQkL
"Being Broken", my memoir about survival and death from Narcissistic Parental Abuse, is available here:
https://a.co/d/6AvDQkL
Pinned
My book 'Being Broken' is now available on multiple platforms.
Apple Books
books.apple.com/us/book/bein...
Kobo
www.kobo.com/ca/en/ebook/...
Waterstones in the UK
www.waterstones.com/book/9781779...
AbeBooks
www.abebooks.com/products/isb...
Booksamillion
www.booksamillion.com/p/9781779629...
Apple Books
books.apple.com/us/book/bein...
Kobo
www.kobo.com/ca/en/ebook/...
Waterstones in the UK
www.waterstones.com/book/9781779...
AbeBooks
www.abebooks.com/products/isb...
Booksamillion
www.booksamillion.com/p/9781779629...
'Breakin' out this bad boy tonight. Reaching that inner child that once loved to break. Some crazy memories.
www.imdb.com/title/tt0086...
www.imdb.com/title/tt0086...
Breakin' (1984) ⭐ 5.9 | Comedy, Drama, Music
1h 27m | PG
www.imdb.com
December 7, 2025 at 5:39 AM
'Breakin' out this bad boy tonight. Reaching that inner child that once loved to break. Some crazy memories.
www.imdb.com/title/tt0086...
www.imdb.com/title/tt0086...
Music Friday!
Feeling much better so I needed some pumped up music. These guys are some of the best at getting you jacked up.
The crowd is crazy here.
youtu.be/cyRIdVoDYG4?...
Feeling much better so I needed some pumped up music. These guys are some of the best at getting you jacked up.
The crowd is crazy here.
youtu.be/cyRIdVoDYG4?...
Limp Bizkit - Full Concert [HD] | Live at Pinkpop 2001
YouTube video by Pinkpop Archive
youtu.be
December 5, 2025 at 9:23 PM
Music Friday!
Feeling much better so I needed some pumped up music. These guys are some of the best at getting you jacked up.
The crowd is crazy here.
youtu.be/cyRIdVoDYG4?...
Feeling much better so I needed some pumped up music. These guys are some of the best at getting you jacked up.
The crowd is crazy here.
youtu.be/cyRIdVoDYG4?...
Narcissists do not accept blame for their actions, nor will they apologize for any harm they cause.
This is tied to the internal belief that they are perfect in thought and behaviour.
They will deflect, shift blame to others, or outright lie, to cover for what others know to be mistakes...
This is tied to the internal belief that they are perfect in thought and behaviour.
They will deflect, shift blame to others, or outright lie, to cover for what others know to be mistakes...
December 5, 2025 at 7:09 PM
Narcissists do not accept blame for their actions, nor will they apologize for any harm they cause.
This is tied to the internal belief that they are perfect in thought and behaviour.
They will deflect, shift blame to others, or outright lie, to cover for what others know to be mistakes...
This is tied to the internal belief that they are perfect in thought and behaviour.
They will deflect, shift blame to others, or outright lie, to cover for what others know to be mistakes...
Getting to the darks first for contrast. My biggest piece so learning how much paint to put on my palette is tricky! So much surface.
Mount Logan. Going with a late sunset, so lots of pinks and purples.
#arttherapy #artsky
Mount Logan. Going with a late sunset, so lots of pinks and purples.
#arttherapy #artsky
December 4, 2025 at 9:51 PM
Getting to the darks first for contrast. My biggest piece so learning how much paint to put on my palette is tricky! So much surface.
Mount Logan. Going with a late sunset, so lots of pinks and purples.
#arttherapy #artsky
Mount Logan. Going with a late sunset, so lots of pinks and purples.
#arttherapy #artsky
Announcing your divorce is a horrible conversation to have with your child.
Especially, when you know your partner is going to tell a different version of what happened.
I live by truth and honesty, always.
I grew up with divorced parents, I know how much the lies hurt. Lying about the other.
Especially, when you know your partner is going to tell a different version of what happened.
I live by truth and honesty, always.
I grew up with divorced parents, I know how much the lies hurt. Lying about the other.
December 3, 2025 at 2:28 AM
Announcing your divorce is a horrible conversation to have with your child.
Especially, when you know your partner is going to tell a different version of what happened.
I live by truth and honesty, always.
I grew up with divorced parents, I know how much the lies hurt. Lying about the other.
Especially, when you know your partner is going to tell a different version of what happened.
I live by truth and honesty, always.
I grew up with divorced parents, I know how much the lies hurt. Lying about the other.
Borealis knows I'm sad. Lovely cuddles.
December 2, 2025 at 10:41 PM
Borealis knows I'm sad. Lovely cuddles.
Today everything is hitting really hard.
The complete rejection from everyone who said that they loved me, except my daughter. The abandonment. The feeling of unworthiness, discard, and catastrophy.
I also know that she has already been spreading her story to preempt mine.
Just breathe. #CPTSD
The complete rejection from everyone who said that they loved me, except my daughter. The abandonment. The feeling of unworthiness, discard, and catastrophy.
I also know that she has already been spreading her story to preempt mine.
Just breathe. #CPTSD
December 2, 2025 at 8:24 PM
Today everything is hitting really hard.
The complete rejection from everyone who said that they loved me, except my daughter. The abandonment. The feeling of unworthiness, discard, and catastrophy.
I also know that she has already been spreading her story to preempt mine.
Just breathe. #CPTSD
The complete rejection from everyone who said that they loved me, except my daughter. The abandonment. The feeling of unworthiness, discard, and catastrophy.
I also know that she has already been spreading her story to preempt mine.
Just breathe. #CPTSD
Well, I've officially sold over 6000 copies of my book!
Not on Amazon though.
Thanks to Lavraria Lello and their affiliate stores - 3300
The APEL - 2500
Amazon and others - ~400
Totally crazy! I didn't expect to sell 100 of them, let alone thousands.
Future looks bright.
Not on Amazon though.
Thanks to Lavraria Lello and their affiliate stores - 3300
The APEL - 2500
Amazon and others - ~400
Totally crazy! I didn't expect to sell 100 of them, let alone thousands.
Future looks bright.
December 1, 2025 at 9:21 PM
Well, I've officially sold over 6000 copies of my book!
Not on Amazon though.
Thanks to Lavraria Lello and their affiliate stores - 3300
The APEL - 2500
Amazon and others - ~400
Totally crazy! I didn't expect to sell 100 of them, let alone thousands.
Future looks bright.
Not on Amazon though.
Thanks to Lavraria Lello and their affiliate stores - 3300
The APEL - 2500
Amazon and others - ~400
Totally crazy! I didn't expect to sell 100 of them, let alone thousands.
Future looks bright.
It's official. I'm signing the separation papers tonight. She is moving out on February 1st. We will be telling our daughter tomorrow night.
Phew, it's done! I feel waves of relief.
I will finally have the peace I need in my life. All my anxiety these days is related to her.
I'm free!
Phew, it's done! I feel waves of relief.
I will finally have the peace I need in my life. All my anxiety these days is related to her.
I'm free!
November 30, 2025 at 1:28 AM
It's official. I'm signing the separation papers tonight. She is moving out on February 1st. We will be telling our daughter tomorrow night.
Phew, it's done! I feel waves of relief.
I will finally have the peace I need in my life. All my anxiety these days is related to her.
I'm free!
Phew, it's done! I feel waves of relief.
I will finally have the peace I need in my life. All my anxiety these days is related to her.
I'm free!
Just got my event plan from Lavraria Lello's marketing team.
Tours, hiking, boat tours, author events, and a big New Year's gala!
They even sent tailored suits for me and dresses for my daughter.
I'm excited and nervous. My brain telling me I don't deserve this kind of recognition.
They think so
Tours, hiking, boat tours, author events, and a big New Year's gala!
They even sent tailored suits for me and dresses for my daughter.
I'm excited and nervous. My brain telling me I don't deserve this kind of recognition.
They think so
November 29, 2025 at 5:15 PM
Just got my event plan from Lavraria Lello's marketing team.
Tours, hiking, boat tours, author events, and a big New Year's gala!
They even sent tailored suits for me and dresses for my daughter.
I'm excited and nervous. My brain telling me I don't deserve this kind of recognition.
They think so
Tours, hiking, boat tours, author events, and a big New Year's gala!
They even sent tailored suits for me and dresses for my daughter.
I'm excited and nervous. My brain telling me I don't deserve this kind of recognition.
They think so
As my stepfather aged, his narcissism progressed dramatically. The anger and rage became near constant.
He would sit in his room drinking, only to come out randomly to boss people around and demean us.
When we stood up to him, he would get flustered and say whatever popped into his head, usually..
He would sit in his room drinking, only to come out randomly to boss people around and demean us.
When we stood up to him, he would get flustered and say whatever popped into his head, usually..
November 29, 2025 at 3:59 AM
As my stepfather aged, his narcissism progressed dramatically. The anger and rage became near constant.
He would sit in his room drinking, only to come out randomly to boss people around and demean us.
When we stood up to him, he would get flustered and say whatever popped into his head, usually..
He would sit in his room drinking, only to come out randomly to boss people around and demean us.
When we stood up to him, he would get flustered and say whatever popped into his head, usually..
More music Friday!
Here it is. The #doom cover of the Downward Spiral by NIN, by various doom metal bands.
Hope you like it heavy...
youtu.be/HOGh_UsoPMY?...
Here it is. The #doom cover of the Downward Spiral by NIN, by various doom metal bands.
Hope you like it heavy...
youtu.be/HOGh_UsoPMY?...
Various Artists - The Downward Spiral Redux [Full Album Player]
YouTube video by Magnetic Eye Records
youtu.be
November 28, 2025 at 7:53 PM
More music Friday!
Here it is. The #doom cover of the Downward Spiral by NIN, by various doom metal bands.
Hope you like it heavy...
youtu.be/HOGh_UsoPMY?...
Here it is. The #doom cover of the Downward Spiral by NIN, by various doom metal bands.
Hope you like it heavy...
youtu.be/HOGh_UsoPMY?...
Music Friday!
Magnetic Eye Records are at it again with a DOOM cover album of Nine Inch Nails!
They are reduxing The Downward Spiral, and as with previous reduxes, they have included a bonus 'best of' of doom bands covering more songs.
Delightful!
youtu.be/ynAv4-NX0Hw?...
Magnetic Eye Records are at it again with a DOOM cover album of Nine Inch Nails!
They are reduxing The Downward Spiral, and as with previous reduxes, they have included a bonus 'best of' of doom bands covering more songs.
Delightful!
youtu.be/ynAv4-NX0Hw?...
Various Artists - Best Of Nine Inch Nails Redux [Full Album Player]
YouTube video by Magnetic Eye Records
youtu.be
November 28, 2025 at 6:48 PM
Music Friday!
Magnetic Eye Records are at it again with a DOOM cover album of Nine Inch Nails!
They are reduxing The Downward Spiral, and as with previous reduxes, they have included a bonus 'best of' of doom bands covering more songs.
Delightful!
youtu.be/ynAv4-NX0Hw?...
Magnetic Eye Records are at it again with a DOOM cover album of Nine Inch Nails!
They are reduxing The Downward Spiral, and as with previous reduxes, they have included a bonus 'best of' of doom bands covering more songs.
Delightful!
youtu.be/ynAv4-NX0Hw?...
This is common for me. After decades of my stepfather telling me to 'suck it up', 'be a man', and talking about psychology as pseudo science, it's hard to quiet that voice.
It took years for me to finally get the help that I needed, to try new types of treatments.
Embrace what works.
#CPTSD
It took years for me to finally get the help that I needed, to try new types of treatments.
Embrace what works.
#CPTSD
Trauma Brain will try to get you to dismiss recovery tools like self-talk, visualization, & purposeful breathing as "silly" or weak sauce or otherwise not worth trying-- but don't let it trick you into assuming that because a tool sounds "simple," it's superficial or ineffective.
November 24, 2025 at 4:15 AM
This is common for me. After decades of my stepfather telling me to 'suck it up', 'be a man', and talking about psychology as pseudo science, it's hard to quiet that voice.
It took years for me to finally get the help that I needed, to try new types of treatments.
Embrace what works.
#CPTSD
It took years for me to finally get the help that I needed, to try new types of treatments.
Embrace what works.
#CPTSD
November 23, 2025 at 10:55 PM
Great score at the local dump free store. In great condition. Prefect for my daughter who is reading them for school right now.
November 23, 2025 at 8:33 PM
Great score at the local dump free store. In great condition. Prefect for my daughter who is reading them for school right now.
Sometimes you need to revisit the things that empower you.
This song is one of those. A musical representation of Imposter Syndrome. And the end is just so uplifting.
youtu.be/s_nc1IVoMxc?...
This song is one of those. A musical representation of Imposter Syndrome. And the end is just so uplifting.
youtu.be/s_nc1IVoMxc?...
Ren - Hi Ren (Official Music Video)
YouTube video by Ren
youtu.be
November 23, 2025 at 7:47 PM
Sometimes you need to revisit the things that empower you.
This song is one of those. A musical representation of Imposter Syndrome. And the end is just so uplifting.
youtu.be/s_nc1IVoMxc?...
This song is one of those. A musical representation of Imposter Syndrome. And the end is just so uplifting.
youtu.be/s_nc1IVoMxc?...
I'm exhausted.
From overwhelm. From the continued gaslighting and manipulation. From self-doubt and feeling worthless. From having to explain my feelings to someone who is incapable of managing their own.
I can't wait to be free of this final blanket of toxicity. To be me, and to be free to do so.
From overwhelm. From the continued gaslighting and manipulation. From self-doubt and feeling worthless. From having to explain my feelings to someone who is incapable of managing their own.
I can't wait to be free of this final blanket of toxicity. To be me, and to be free to do so.
November 23, 2025 at 7:29 PM
I'm exhausted.
From overwhelm. From the continued gaslighting and manipulation. From self-doubt and feeling worthless. From having to explain my feelings to someone who is incapable of managing their own.
I can't wait to be free of this final blanket of toxicity. To be me, and to be free to do so.
From overwhelm. From the continued gaslighting and manipulation. From self-doubt and feeling worthless. From having to explain my feelings to someone who is incapable of managing their own.
I can't wait to be free of this final blanket of toxicity. To be me, and to be free to do so.
Ozzy Osbourne | Black Sabbath – Live in Paris 1970
YouTube video by 107.7 The Underground
youtu.be
November 21, 2025 at 7:56 PM
Music Friday!
Some really obscure, amazing Canadian punk. I remember when I bought their cassette when I was 13. I bought a bunch of my first punk tapes that day, based on swear words in the song titles. I found some greats.
It is obscene, and definitely NSFW.
open.spotify.com/album/0wxZ7o...
Some really obscure, amazing Canadian punk. I remember when I bought their cassette when I was 13. I bought a bunch of my first punk tapes that day, based on swear words in the song titles. I found some greats.
It is obscene, and definitely NSFW.
open.spotify.com/album/0wxZ7o...
Here Today Guano Tomorrow
open.spotify.com
November 21, 2025 at 7:07 PM
Music Friday!
Some really obscure, amazing Canadian punk. I remember when I bought their cassette when I was 13. I bought a bunch of my first punk tapes that day, based on swear words in the song titles. I found some greats.
It is obscene, and definitely NSFW.
open.spotify.com/album/0wxZ7o...
Some really obscure, amazing Canadian punk. I remember when I bought their cassette when I was 13. I bought a bunch of my first punk tapes that day, based on swear words in the song titles. I found some greats.
It is obscene, and definitely NSFW.
open.spotify.com/album/0wxZ7o...
Hey #Oxford, #Mississippi ffolks!
Square Books just got their shipment of my books in. Should be on the shelves soon!
#booksky #beingbroken
squarebooks.com
Square Books just got their shipment of my books in. Should be on the shelves soon!
#booksky #beingbroken
squarebooks.com
November 21, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Hey #Oxford, #Mississippi ffolks!
Square Books just got their shipment of my books in. Should be on the shelves soon!
#booksky #beingbroken
squarebooks.com
Square Books just got their shipment of my books in. Should be on the shelves soon!
#booksky #beingbroken
squarebooks.com
November 20, 2025 at 11:26 PM
Just made homemade ice cream with egg nog, peaches, and chocolate chips.
Seriously, so good.
#iscream4icecream
Seriously, so good.
#iscream4icecream
November 19, 2025 at 4:17 AM
Just made homemade ice cream with egg nog, peaches, and chocolate chips.
Seriously, so good.
#iscream4icecream
Seriously, so good.
#iscream4icecream
Nice to be added to this list on Next Best Read!
#booksky #beingbroken
nextbestread.com/so/22PfpkTq4...
#booksky #beingbroken
nextbestread.com/so/22PfpkTq4...
Under the Spotlight Check out these amazing books!
Get Noticed! Check Out Our Offers!
nextbestread.com
November 18, 2025 at 10:16 PM
Nice to be added to this list on Next Best Read!
#booksky #beingbroken
nextbestread.com/so/22PfpkTq4...
#booksky #beingbroken
nextbestread.com/so/22PfpkTq4...
Once again, I am being reminded of the decline of Facebook.
Hurtful comments, derogatory messages, so much anger.
I will be limiting any use of my FB author page going forward. It's not worth the aggravation.
It's nice here. I'll stick with BSKY, thanks.
Hurtful comments, derogatory messages, so much anger.
I will be limiting any use of my FB author page going forward. It's not worth the aggravation.
It's nice here. I'll stick with BSKY, thanks.
November 18, 2025 at 6:09 PM
Once again, I am being reminded of the decline of Facebook.
Hurtful comments, derogatory messages, so much anger.
I will be limiting any use of my FB author page going forward. It's not worth the aggravation.
It's nice here. I'll stick with BSKY, thanks.
Hurtful comments, derogatory messages, so much anger.
I will be limiting any use of my FB author page going forward. It's not worth the aggravation.
It's nice here. I'll stick with BSKY, thanks.