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old man boywife

@groceries.bsky.social

220 followers 87 following 2.7K posts

be the freak you wanna see just don't follow me *but actually don't follow me or I'll block you* queer - any/all DNI if you exist.

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 13h

Response privileges revoked. The next few months are going to be excruciating.

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 16h

Doctor's orders

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 1d

Actually my neighbor just came over to ask if I could open her diet coke and now everything is fine

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 1d

Okay so I'm going to fucking die. It's fine.

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 3d

Working on a post about how releasing a bad song about dick is particularly bold right now because we're getting a new ashnikko album this month. Anyway, pretend I said something funny with this observation.

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 4d

I have to do something that's going to make me temporarily insane but could, in theory, fix me forever. Expect a lot of limited edition posts starting Wednesday.

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 7d

Oh I think I actually hate this place

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 7d

You bitches really made me go to the popular with friends feed. Unforgivable. But it did work and now I'm 20% caught up. This may be an issue of block lists working as intended.

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 7d

I scrolled my entire timeline and read every post so it's not like I'm not interested in learning what's going on

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 8d

I don't think I spend toooo much time talking to my therapist about grapes but it's not zero time

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 8d

Allegedly

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 8d

Oh no my eye hurts, time to use the eye drops that make my eye hurt, this will fix the issue of my eye hurting

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 8d

I have to wear a little outfit and get complimented by a hot woman and/or visibly queer person in public SOON it's been like TWO WEEKS I'M WITHERING

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 9d

*ideally you will use this to eventually mask everywhere you think disabled people should be allowed to exist* but if you need to start small fuckin start small it's fine!! love that for us! zero sarcasm!

Reposted by old man boywife

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 17d

Hi if you stopped masking I would like to invite you, and give you explicit permission, to half-ass it. Public transit, grocery store, doctor's office. It's fine.

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 9d

I peeked into the custodial supply closet and there aren't any in there 😶

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 10d

By exaggerating slightly. Since I'm looking for video visits only, I manually expanded my search to my entire state instead of searching by proximity like all these databases default to.

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 10d

I know what will fix me. Cooking beans the long way.

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 11d

Weird too hot fall week was LAST WEEK it's already done don't do this

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 11d

No. We've been through this.

Screenshot of a weather app showing highs in the 80s and low 90s which is too hot and it's literally fall!

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 12d

Also my phone wanted to autocorrect their name to Dent. Stupid name.

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 12d

Denny called me out for lying because what I actually said was "I had a thought about socks and had to write it down in my sock journal. This is my sock journal."

I didn't think the full context was important but I see now that I was wrong and I apologize.

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 12d

I will never know, so I'm giving full credit to the nice kid instead. He played a great show.

old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 12d

Megan is the one I technically have a tattoo of but I'm the only one who knows that, haha. I forgot to turn the pick over and now I'm totally sure I'm wrong, because it has a fire symbol. So...Simon maybe? I think I first saw them when only one original member had left, but I don't know who.

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old man boywife @groceries.bsky.social · 12d

Also happy birthday!!!