Mercenary Barbie ✨
@hystericaljoke.bsky.social
120 followers 140 following 81 posts
You wanna know what DLC stands for? It means "Deadpool Living Comfortably"! || Mun: XXIV
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Pinned
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
Anyways, while the writer figures out how the hell this place is supposed to work, please accept this temporary pin.

:]
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"Delusional?? Ask her about the contract she had me sign and then IMMEDIATELY backed out on.

She'll know, or even twitch like she doesn't know."
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
I don't get plenty of sleep at night, that's why I'm never here.

... nootherreason—
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"Uh... I made food and brought the mail in so no one would take it?"
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"I unfriend you."

Wade that's not how this works.
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"The doors aren't exactly lockable..." He'd preface, before placing the plate down.

"Just a mercenary needing to unwind from a messy job yesterday. Figured it'd be easier to converse about sticking around than... a more gruesome route."
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"Just trust me when I say he's bad news. So don't ever go near him."
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
He picks up the disembodied limb and putting it back in place. Wade would then go to tend to the others cut in her forehead.

"Yeesh... Hang tight. I'll patch you up." He'd pull out a first aid kit before proceeding to clean up her wound.
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"For fucks sake dude, I need that money. And it's not even for me!"
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"A few hours." He'd comment from offering her a plate of pancakes.

"Hungry?"
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"Huh? Tis but a flesh wound."

He's missing a whole arm, the removed limb to his feet.

"Nothing I can't reattach! Are you okay? You seem to be bleeding... right there." He'd motion to her forehead.
Reposted by Mercenary Barbie ✨
colddaggers.bsky.social
LoKi
Variant-ish
By #punkkwitch

✨mostly He/they
(unless otherwise specified)
✨ genderfluid
✨bisexual
✨god(dess)

Sassy, Flirty, egotistical, and mischievous

Independent Portrayal!!
(Pieces of Mythology, MCU & comics)
(N)SFW, DARK THEMES
MDNI
Ships with Chem!

NO THORKI
NO SYLKI
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"That explains the familiarity.

Do me a favor, next time you see her, and tell her that her ex is waiting on that severance pay."
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
Think of the worst possible thing imagineable.

Then apply that to the worst mercenary in existence.
Reposted by Mercenary Barbie ✨
eccentriccell.bsky.social
𝑂𝑁𝐶𝐸 𝑇𝐻𝐸 𝑇𝐸𝑅𝑅𝑂𝑅 𝑂𝐹 𝐴𝐿𝐿.
𝑁𝑂𝑊 𝑇𝐻𝐸 𝑃𝑅𝑂𝑇𝐸𝐶𝑇𝑂𝑅 𝑂𝐹
𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑰𝑵𝑵𝑶𝑪𝑬𝑵𝑻.

𝑂𝑁𝐶𝐸 𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑭𝑬𝑪𝑻 𝑁𝑂𝑊 𝑬𝑵𝑫𝒀.
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"... You wouldn't happen to have had a sister named Satana have you?"
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
If that's how it you wanna sleep at night, sure — keep telling yourself that, O'Hara
miguelohxra.bsky.social
my homophobia isn’t directed at you, making this not wadephobic i assure you
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
This is Wadephobic, not homophobic.
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
"Wasn't aware we were on first name basis.

Others usually just refer to me as Deadpool. Who are you?"
hystericaljoke.bsky.social
I'm going to work on the pinned info and stop being a lazy shit.
(Imma be slow about it, but it will be done)