Jess 🫘
@jessicactus.bsky.social
760 followers 3.3K following 58 posts
(she/they) just another exhausted millennial who needs to chill tf out 💀
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Why hello there, friend! ♡

#mimikyu #pokemon #fanart
art by me, digital drawing of the pokemon mimikyu ( ミミッキュ ) in the grass by some ruins. They're waving "hello"!
Reposted by Jess 🫘
as spooky season rolls around, I need to remind everyone that the person in this viral werewolf image is in fact my friend @smogteeth.bsky.social lmao
I drew a magical companion to join wizard frog 🐸✨️

#axolotl #bard #doodle
Axolotl bard playing a lute, drawn by me!
Reposted by Jess 🫘
That’s such a fluffy, sleepy pumpkin 🧡

#art #cozyart #caturday
Watercolor illustration of a bunch of colorful pumpkins, with a beige striped cat sleeping on top of them curled up into a ball, slightly resembling the round pumpkins itself.
the shower monster is in there, why did u take so long? 🥺
Reposted by Jess 🫘
I've seen corvids do this and it’s very adorable. Here is Murkrow doing something similar. Have you seen those videos before?

#pokemonart #pokemon
Why hello there, friend! ♡

#mimikyu #pokemon #fanart
art by me, digital drawing of the pokemon mimikyu ( ミミッキュ ) in the grass by some ruins. They're waving "hello"!
Reposted by Jess 🫘
Speak up for those
who have no voice,
for the justice of all
who are dispossessed.
Speak up, judge righteously,
and defend the cause of
the oppressed and needy.
—Proverbs 31:8-9
Just #AccountsPayable nonsense...
A.P. Adventures, based off my experience working accounts payable.

Panel 1: Smiling boss with invoice, "PAY this N60"
Smiling employee, "OK boss!"

Panel 2: Angry boss, "That was due N30! Why do you suck at your job?!"
Employee is annoyed. :/
Got Miltank? 🐮🥛

I've been trying to draw more lately... #Pokémon #fanart #miltank
Digital drawing of a miltank and moo moo milk... "Got Miltank?" (Like "Got Milk?")
Reposted by Jess 🫘
I've been the one freezing in the workplace, so I understand being cold... but before you turn the heat up to 78 mayyyybe try a sweater first. 💀
Reposted by Jess 🫘
what kind of sorcery is this 💦
I just tested positive yesterday for the first time & I asked the boss if I should come in masked when able. I got, "employees report to work unless they have a fever"

Uhh sorry, not this one! I'm not coughing & sneezing all over my coworkers when I'm clearly very contagious... 🤧
If not friend, then why friend shaped? 🐝💕

jkjk but they are pretty little parasites! 💀
Photo of a red spider wasp (?) resting on my thumb, over a blue mesh outdoor table
Omw to start listening to the Daily Beans 🫘
MushrOom mushrOom 🦡🍄🐍
Photo of a bumpy mushroom in some mulch
This is a beautiful tribute 🥺🩷
Reposted by Jess 🫘
ANTS ARE COOL. 🐜🐜🐜

"With their large mandibles, these Pokémon can crunch their way through rock."

#pokemon #durant #ants #artbyme 🐜
Digital drawing (by me!) of the Pokémon durant, #0632
Happy gardening, comrades! 👩‍🌾
A parody gardening guide for the 'Felon Melon' (a cantaloupe edited with Trump's face)

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Cultivar Spotlight: Felon Melon

Corruptis melodramaticus var. cheetolilpenis

An arrogant and treasonous variety, known for its peculiar orange flesh and bitter interior. Thrives in closed environments and is notoriously resistant to oversight. Requires a steady diet of adulation and fast food.

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Hardiness Zone: Zero accountability.
Sunlight: Requires full spotlight. Does not tolerate shade.
Harvest Season: Often contested. Best removed before January 6th, before it starts an insurrection.
Support: Needs a strong, undemocratic trellis to cling to.

CAUTION: Contains seeds of sedition. Side effects include rejection of reality, and deterioration of civil liberties.

WARNING: Invasive species. Propagates rapidly through misinformation. Capable of choking out democracy and bleeding hearts. Avoid planting without a strong legal system in place to prevent a hostile garden takeover.
Just a little elementary-level geometry refresher for everyone! Don't worry, we're grading on a curve. ✍️

#Trump #Education
A parody of a geometry diagram showing three types of hexagons: a standard convex hexagon, a concave hexagon with a dent, and a third labeled 'Convict Hexagon' containing a picture of Donald Trump.