@k3llz3bub.bsky.social
I just poured DayQuil into a can of sprite like a heathy lean
February 1, 2026 at 3:17 AM
I just poured DayQuil into a can of sprite like a heathy lean
The last day of laughter
February 1, 2026 at 1:20 AM
The last day of laughter
nathan fielder and Tim Robinson are the same person in my head but that’s because I have no cringe tolerance
January 23, 2026 at 6:10 PM
nathan fielder and Tim Robinson are the same person in my head but that’s because I have no cringe tolerance
Dead dad club, no one wants to join but everybody wants the merch
January 14, 2026 at 1:54 AM
Dead dad club, no one wants to join but everybody wants the merch
I’m bartending a live sport podcast recording and my white man face blindness is working against me in a way I wasn’t prepared for.
January 8, 2026 at 1:04 AM
I’m bartending a live sport podcast recording and my white man face blindness is working against me in a way I wasn’t prepared for.
The worst part of working a u shaped bar is if you have to pick your nose, you just gotta leave.
January 4, 2026 at 8:09 PM
The worst part of working a u shaped bar is if you have to pick your nose, you just gotta leave.
In the darkest corner of the ha ha hehe factory, that’s where you can find me
January 4, 2026 at 1:37 AM
In the darkest corner of the ha ha hehe factory, that’s where you can find me
If I never bartend another toddler’s birthday party then I could start to live a good life.
December 7, 2025 at 10:25 PM
If I never bartend another toddler’s birthday party then I could start to live a good life.
“Did you hear what I said?”
“No”
“Well I forgot so you missed out”
“No”
“Well I forgot so you missed out”
December 3, 2025 at 6:05 AM
“Did you hear what I said?”
“No”
“Well I forgot so you missed out”
“No”
“Well I forgot so you missed out”
Also every time someone buys a drink and doesn’t tip but says “I appreciate you” a trap door should open underneath them
November 30, 2025 at 3:46 AM
Also every time someone buys a drink and doesn’t tip but says “I appreciate you” a trap door should open underneath them
I’m only saying this because I’m cranky but I really hate when I sell someone a drink and they say cheers. We’re in America and I’m not drinking so now we both have bad luck!!!!
November 30, 2025 at 1:26 AM
I’m only saying this because I’m cranky but I really hate when I sell someone a drink and they say cheers. We’re in America and I’m not drinking so now we both have bad luck!!!!
Every person I’ve matched with on tinder today is looking for a job and I’ve sent all of them openings. Because I love supporting queers and broke bitches.
November 29, 2025 at 3:35 AM
Every person I’ve matched with on tinder today is looking for a job and I’ve sent all of them openings. Because I love supporting queers and broke bitches.
Low key who am I type shit
November 28, 2025 at 5:40 AM
Low key who am I type shit
My therapist is so good she’s ruined all my best bits
November 20, 2025 at 10:43 PM
My therapist is so good she’s ruined all my best bits
Am I deeply seasonally depressed or has quizzo in a nearly empty bar always reminded me of my relationship with my parents?
November 19, 2025 at 12:22 AM
Am I deeply seasonally depressed or has quizzo in a nearly empty bar always reminded me of my relationship with my parents?
Putting sunlamps behind the bar as a public health and safety matter
November 18, 2025 at 10:28 PM
Putting sunlamps behind the bar as a public health and safety matter
Urology networking event at my job is really pissing me off
November 16, 2025 at 10:44 PM
Urology networking event at my job is really pissing me off
Have you ever been so angry you wish your hands were guns?
November 16, 2025 at 10:23 PM
Have you ever been so angry you wish your hands were guns?
I love when people ask me how the comedy show was at the end of my shift. It was great I got so much done on Facebook marketplace.
November 15, 2025 at 3:29 AM
I love when people ask me how the comedy show was at the end of my shift. It was great I got so much done on Facebook marketplace.
My memoir is gonna be called “did I smoke that whole blunt?”
November 14, 2025 at 4:42 AM
My memoir is gonna be called “did I smoke that whole blunt?”
I’m polyamorous in a “can each of you give me $20” type of way
November 10, 2025 at 3:56 AM
I’m polyamorous in a “can each of you give me $20” type of way
I gotta stop asking woke people for tampons
November 8, 2025 at 3:54 AM
I gotta stop asking woke people for tampons
Not to brag but I’ve eaten like 5 cloves of garlic today
November 7, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Not to brag but I’ve eaten like 5 cloves of garlic today
red jumpsuit apparatus so corny I almost stayed with my abuser
October 28, 2025 at 10:20 PM
red jumpsuit apparatus so corny I almost stayed with my abuser
I have a meme folding called “ouch” and if I have slow therapy day I’m gonna ask her to explain why these memes hurt my feelings.
October 24, 2025 at 2:53 PM
I have a meme folding called “ouch” and if I have slow therapy day I’m gonna ask her to explain why these memes hurt my feelings.