Pseudo-feelings express an evaluation of someone else’s behavior. They generally carry a message of wrongness or blame. Understanding pseudo feelings was a game changer for me. It helped me to pay attention judgmental words that I use in my communication not only to others but more so with myself.

The past few days I got hit by a virus and still recovering from it. I also got into periods of frustration around how I wanted to be cared for. This led me to explore my perceptions and expectations around care. Hope you can relate with this new post open.substack.com/pub/communit...

Did you know that “30-70% of individuals who experience trauma also report positive change and growth”? (Joseph & Butler, 2010)

Interested to know more about Post Traumatic Growth? check out www.refugia.world/challenge-pa...

#PostTraumaticGrowth #Refugia #HealingCenteredEcosystems

Here’s a free self-paced course on the personal iceberg model from Virginia Satir. It’s one of the most transformational models I use for myself & with clients to understand one’s self & unpack what’s hidden below the waterline of our behaviors & coping stances.

www.refugia.world/challenge-pa...

I am proud to share a new resource on #CultivateCalm 40 Somatic exercises for Nervous System Relaxation

www.refugia.world/product-page...

Thank you. I wrote about this here open.substack.com/pub/communit...

We fall prey to binary thinking when it comes to engaging with each other- it’s either this person is this, or that. This makes it easier for us to “either like this person or not”/ “be accepting of this person or not”. I remind myself of the different levels of engagement from Filipino Psychology.

Our self consists of dimensions in time, genealogy, and history. Inside of us are also historical and intergenerational fields. We carry in us values, perspectives, and expectations (especially around roles) that are passed on from generation to generation.

A new post is out on unpacking our #ParallelLives Like dandelions, our “self” consists of different parts and there are relational fields inside of us that interplay with these parts.

this quote made me think…When do I find myself making choices out of fear?
How does that feel in my body?
What makes it different when I make a choice reflecting my hopes?
How does that feel?
I am still mulling over this. Sharing it here for those drawn to reflect on these questions with me 🥰

So yesterday was my first time out after the mastectomy. We went to the AlmeerPlant to look at Christmas decors and of course to buy some plants 😂

This has been a place of refuge for me. My family calls it “bringing Mama to her happy place.”
What are your happy places?
share a photo please! 🥰🥰🥰

Deeply stirred to reflect on this - about our selves full of parts and our parallel lives.

In a session on #relationality hosted by The Relationships Project I was introduced to Vā.

“Vā is the space between, the betweenness, not empty space, not space that separates but space that relates, that holds separate entities and things together in the Unity-that-is-All.” —Albert Tuaopepe Wendt

But what about us #doglovers ? 🥰

Which one do you gravitate and use often? Which one do you want to explore?

We are so used to hearing about #trauma or #coping responses. But have you heard about #healingcentered responses?

For the past week after my mastectomy, #flocking has been a gift and a deeply held practice. Really flexing the #TendAndBefriend responses. #WeHealAsCommunity

My pleasure!

Very interesting! Gives me an idea for our backyard!

@waynevisser.bsky.social pendulation is one of the healing tools that can support us in this challenging times.

@waynevisser.bsky.social we also need tools and practices for collective healing.

When we practice pendulation we expand our capacity to hold space for complexities. We widen our window of tolerance and be in a resourced state.

I deeply admire and value Michelle Holliday, author of
The Age of Thrivability: Vital Perspectives and Practices for a Better World. She recently launched Thrivable Worldz You can check out her Life’s Universal Design Principles here www.thrivableworld.com/tools/lifes-...