Ryan Cordell
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laststarfighter.bsky.social
Ryan Cordell
@laststarfighter.bsky.social
450 followers 430 following 1.8K posts
If anyone wants to report any of my posts to my boss… the number is 719-266-2837. Ask for John.
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A relative being call aunt is more credible than 85% of your staff calling themselves journalists, including 100% of your talking heads named Jake.
So we know if Zohran Mamdani has ever dined at At Olive Garden? Because when you are there, you are family.
If we kept up at that pace we would have around 30,000 ships in our fleet. (If we kept them all afloat)

The US Navy currently has around 480 ships.

Why do we need to build one a day again (if we ever did)?
This is like calling your founder, Ted Turner, a wrestler because he owned the WCW.
I always called my dad’s cousin’s husband “uncle” and when I visited him in the hospital he told the nurses I was his nephew. He was a far better uncle than any legit uncles I had.
Has Mike met Jarod and Elon?
He has to be the most willingly ignorant man on this planet.
Could someone ask him how the president raising tariffs without Congressional approval is legal or legitimate?

Or do laws only apply when they can use them to screw Americans?
This is very concerning, both for my chance of getting an OCB, but even more so for all the jet skiers in the village that are inconvenienced. Please destroy the OCB-AI bot before it destroys the planet (unless you can fix it and get me an OCB).
Thanks for the heads up. If I can find someone to join me I’ll go as a couple who accidentally ordered 22 cartons of soup in their online shopping last week (they only meant to order 2!), Otherwise I’ll have to go once again as a man who has never gone hot air ballooning.
I’d love media outlets to point out he can not have a third term.

Quit pandering to the dementia patient
They have to stroke his tiny ego to maintain their access so they can write those tell all books with things they should have reported at the time it mattered.
That Jake Tapper book on the president’s dementia is going to be a best seller in 2029.
And JBS, one of the largest meat processors in the US, is Brazilian owned.
Is that little kid even old enough to have an Instagram account?
Will the babies have legs? Mark Z. promised we would have legs.
If he didn’t ask for a spoon to gouge his eyes out he isn’t the hardcore Christian that he claims he is.
Has she been active for a while or do she come out of hiding to try to get some of the grift pie left after Charlie got out of the grifting business?
It brings me some joy that one of the comedians that recently played at the Riyadh Comedy Festival is currently begging for people to attend his show in Wisconsin. Hannibal Buress has been running FB ads all week, and two hours before the show I got this text:
Reposted by Ryan Cordell
Oct 26th 1985 - 40 Years ago today! - Mikey, Chunk, Data and Mouth went on a treasure hunt to save the "Goon Docks".

📽️📅 The Goonies (1985)
JD knows the real victim of 9/11 was George Santos’s mother. That is the real reason his boss pardoned him.