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lauriland.bsky.social
LauriLand
@lauriland.bsky.social
60 followers 79 following 66 posts
Storyreader, storyteller, storylover https://thelauriland.wordpress.com/
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He’s just going places and eating bread. Just bread.

Except for one episode when he goes to Wisconsin and eats cheese.

Sounds chaotic. But you know I’m in.
I’m excited that I just heard about the newest entry into my favorite genre of streaming shows with old man actors traveling around the world to eat food and it’s another of my faves, Tony Shalhoub. It’s called ‘Tony Shalhoub Breaks Bread.’ These shows just keep getting more and more specific. 1/2
Andy: So, you excited for your new school year to start tomorrow?

Me: I’m standing in the kitchen, ‘toasting’ marshmallows on our gas cooktop using a fork. What do you think?
In light of all of the announcements by last year’s SNL cast members, I’d like to officially announce that I too will not be appearing on SNL next season.
I’m here to motivate you to go to the gym. #gymrat #wegovy #workout #over50women #over50fitness
One time we went to a Mets game and a Beatles concert broke out

#Mets #citifield #beatles #cantbuymelove #1964thetribute
(3/3) so that I could pretend that David Sedaris was sitting next to me on the couch reading it to me.

It worked.
and read it aloud to no one, in my empty living room, using my best slightly southern accent, pausing strategically between just the right words, and using expressive intonation and proper stretching of syllables (2/ )
Earlier this year, I listened to a collection of David Sedaris essays read by the author.

Today, I opened the latest issue of The New Yorker, discovered a new David Sedaris essay, and tried to read it. I couldn’t make it past the first paragraph without being totally distracted so I went back (1/ )
Me: That line in the Counting Crows song when he says, “She has trouble acting normal when she’s nervous,” really hits deep. I totally get that.

Husband: I’d say that you have trouble acting normal all the time.

#ThanksHoney
As she handed me my iced coffee, the barista said, “Stay cool!” and it took me an embarrassing amount of time to realize that she wasn’t recognizing my awesomeness but was warning me about the excessive heat warning in NY.
How is it possible that Melissa Etheridge isn’t in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame yet? Her songs and performances are a master class ❤️
Is this the perfect metaphor for our current Circumstances, or what?
thehill.com
2/ ..it’s kind of like if someone made a movie with a possibly excellent story and performances but that was 3+ hours long, demonstrating the inability to write a tight story and people tuned out and a fraction of the film-going audience ended up seeing your masterpiece. Oh wait.
The issue with Adrian Brody’s speech wasn’t merely the length, it was the arrogance and self-centeredness that he felt that he could take whatever amount of time he wanted to because he wanted to. And people tuned out what he was saying. It’s kind of like 1/
Reposted by LauriLand
Portuguese editorial cartoonist Zez Vaz reaches back to Tiananmen Square to call on American defiance.
Ken Jennings, discussing that the Billy Joel category wasn’t going well on Celebrity Jeopardy tonight:

“The ratings are tanking in Long Island right now.”

All of Long Island, in unison:

“ON Long Island!!!
It just surprised me that you’d call something standard in another culture ‘wrong.’ Wrong really does imply bad. Just a reflection on whether culture should/shouldn’t be judged.
I know that your saying it’s spelled ‘wrong’ is prob an extension of your original joke, and reading your bio, we definitely see eye to eye on a lot. But I’m thinking you wouldn’t note spelling differences in other cultures as ‘wrong’ when they’re standard. The shade toward US is so curious to me! 😁
If they spelled organization with an ‘s,’ it was most certainly not an American though.