maddie ☕
@maddieisntfunny.bsky.social
sleepy space nerd
windows down drinking the colorful car wash soaps
she/her 🏳️⚧️ 21+
windows down drinking the colorful car wash soaps
she/her 🏳️⚧️ 21+
december historically has been a fucking terrible month for me in terms of ye olde traumatic life events. this year the trend seems to be having to confront all of them all at once?
eh who knows theres still time for more shit to happen, tis the season
eh who knows theres still time for more shit to happen, tis the season
December 10, 2025 at 1:23 AM
december historically has been a fucking terrible month for me in terms of ye olde traumatic life events. this year the trend seems to be having to confront all of them all at once?
eh who knows theres still time for more shit to happen, tis the season
eh who knows theres still time for more shit to happen, tis the season
phalloplasty surgical instructions be like hey guys welcome to my unboxing video
December 7, 2025 at 5:14 PM
phalloplasty surgical instructions be like hey guys welcome to my unboxing video
🎶🎄
o cock & balls,
o cock & balls,
thy torture wont let up at all
o cock & balls,
o cock & balls,
thy torture wont let up at all
December 1, 2025 at 3:14 PM
🎶🎄
o cock & balls,
o cock & balls,
thy torture wont let up at all
o cock & balls,
o cock & balls,
thy torture wont let up at all
i live in bustin massivehugetits i love da red sox
November 22, 2025 at 7:02 PM
i live in bustin massivehugetits i love da red sox
dont worry gang, this time theres no way ill get burned by my own overconfidence in this thing ive never really done before
November 22, 2025 at 1:55 AM
dont worry gang, this time theres no way ill get burned by my own overconfidence in this thing ive never really done before
(hooking up with straight men)
my legs
by back
shave my pussy and my crack 😔
my legs
by back
shave my pussy and my crack 😔
November 14, 2025 at 10:07 PM
(hooking up with straight men)
my legs
by back
shave my pussy and my crack 😔
my legs
by back
shave my pussy and my crack 😔
yes ive spent my morning pre-planning and rehearsing my inflection and facial expressions before i go ask someone to complete a menial administrative task for me because if i dont ill probably flub it somehow and theyll think i hate them and then theyll hate me, what of it?
November 13, 2025 at 3:58 PM
yes ive spent my morning pre-planning and rehearsing my inflection and facial expressions before i go ask someone to complete a menial administrative task for me because if i dont ill probably flub it somehow and theyll think i hate them and then theyll hate me, what of it?
halloween trilogy
November 1, 2025 at 3:57 AM
halloween trilogy
they should invent sleeping pills that make me sleep instead of making me delirious for 45 minutes then i come to and my brain becomes a shitty pinball machine that instead of bells & chimes it just plays the spongebob boowomp sound whenever the ball hits something
October 14, 2025 at 3:37 AM
they should invent sleeping pills that make me sleep instead of making me delirious for 45 minutes then i come to and my brain becomes a shitty pinball machine that instead of bells & chimes it just plays the spongebob boowomp sound whenever the ball hits something
youve heard of the big & tall store now get ready for the dick & ball store (selfie unrelated)
October 11, 2025 at 9:17 PM
youve heard of the big & tall store now get ready for the dick & ball store (selfie unrelated)
gas station pizza slice save me
October 9, 2025 at 6:41 PM
gas station pizza slice save me
5 calls from Spam Risk in the past 24 hours do yall think they have a crush on me 😳😳
September 30, 2025 at 9:15 PM
5 calls from Spam Risk in the past 24 hours do yall think they have a crush on me 😳😳
do yall think jd vance uses feng shui to spice things up eith his couch
September 21, 2025 at 8:27 PM
do yall think jd vance uses feng shui to spice things up eith his couch
i know im in good hands when my therapist tells me to skip work for the day
August 27, 2025 at 3:51 PM
i know im in good hands when my therapist tells me to skip work for the day
standing over my kitchen sink eating a block of cheese, not really in a rodent way, more like just chomping into it like an apple, crisp and refreshing except not really
July 30, 2025 at 2:57 AM
standing over my kitchen sink eating a block of cheese, not really in a rodent way, more like just chomping into it like an apple, crisp and refreshing except not really
Reposted by maddie ☕
"One in the stink is worth two in the bush" - @maddieisntfunny.bsky.social
July 17, 2025 at 3:41 AM
"One in the stink is worth two in the bush" - @maddieisntfunny.bsky.social
Reposted by maddie ☕
crowd erupts into Zohran chants after watching two transsexuals wrestle in an inflatable pool full of queso. nyc undefeated
June 29, 2025 at 12:50 AM
crowd erupts into Zohran chants after watching two transsexuals wrestle in an inflatable pool full of queso. nyc undefeated
oh hey look, another doctor immediately blaming my health problem on HRT and saying to lower my dose before we try anything else despite me having this problem since pre transition. i didnt know estrogen can retroactively cause a lifetime of sleep issues but im not a doctor so what do i know
June 26, 2025 at 3:26 PM
oh hey look, another doctor immediately blaming my health problem on HRT and saying to lower my dose before we try anything else despite me having this problem since pre transition. i didnt know estrogen can retroactively cause a lifetime of sleep issues but im not a doctor so what do i know
i would like to go one (1) day without feeling like im drowning, personally, but i guess its selfish of me to ask for anything other than uhhh world war 3
June 22, 2025 at 1:52 AM
i would like to go one (1) day without feeling like im drowning, personally, but i guess its selfish of me to ask for anything other than uhhh world war 3
i cant ruin my sleep schedule if i dont have one in the first place
June 19, 2025 at 4:16 AM
i cant ruin my sleep schedule if i dont have one in the first place
felt cute might fuck ur dad later
June 15, 2025 at 4:49 PM
felt cute might fuck ur dad later
she slick on my cornhole til i woody's
June 1, 2025 at 9:50 PM
she slick on my cornhole til i woody's
another successful trip to the grocery store (looked at the pasta aisle and said "ooh i should make pasta tonight" then forgot to buy pasta)
May 23, 2025 at 8:39 PM
another successful trip to the grocery store (looked at the pasta aisle and said "ooh i should make pasta tonight" then forgot to buy pasta)
oh yea baby we're fully in "maddie gets drenched in sweat the millisecond she steps outside" season, send help
May 16, 2025 at 4:45 PM
oh yea baby we're fully in "maddie gets drenched in sweat the millisecond she steps outside" season, send help