Whenever I go to chick fil a and they ask for my name, I give them a fake name. This was all fun and game until I pulled out, and they said order for Akbarb, and I was confused for 3 minutes.

#bettergetupouttamyface

Choirs aint been the same since they stopped marching into service.

I promise I know all the words but I can't rap them.

If you never got out of the shower and only lotioned the body parts, people could see them, you #bettergetupouttamyface (only dudes do this, I know)

It's 2024 why hasn't anyone invented a cushioned allen wrench yet? Putting together a bed and my fingers are raw and blistered up.

#bettergetupouttamyface

Somebody online said "if you make your partner laugh during sex is that an inside joke?" Now I can't stop laughing

If you call my phone and the first thing you say is "what did I call you for" or "what was I going to tell you" I am hanging up on you immediately, #bettergetupouttamyface Alexander Graham Bell and shoot me a text when you remember.

Have you ever been driving behind someone and they are doing an excellent job so you follow them lane to lane to get to your destination faster? Yea, I did that this morning and ended up in Xena, Ohio.

#Bettergetupouttamyface

Somebody online said "if you make your partner laugh during sex is that an inside joke?" Now I can't stop laughing

Random thought, do people name their daughter Deja anymore? Cause I aint seen a toddler Deja in over a decade. I remember when every 7th girl in school was some form of Deja or Keisha.

My homeboy just was telling me he had jury duty and they elected him as jury Formam I was so proud of him and that I would definitely be adding that to my resume because I am basically a lawyer now.

Marc Fazon, ESQ will be going on all emails from hence forth.

Doing what I love.