Rob Clarke
@robclarke00.bsky.social
Artist and Master of Scoot, the world’s sweetest all-American doggy. Scoot wants to show the world how happy he is being a dog, and how he doesn’t miss his old hum-drum life on two legs one bit.
www.robclarke.net
https://linktr.ee/robclarke00
www.robclarke.net
https://linktr.ee/robclarke00
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Rob Clarke
@robclarke00.bsky.social
· Jul 1
So here’s my idea for the opening credits of the Scoot and Master Show. I wonder what network I should pitch it to? ESPN, Animal Planet, BET? I hope someone picks it up ― after all, Scoot works for doggy treats and for me it’s a labor of puppy love.
My sweet butterball Scoot is so thankful that he’s a doggy. He’s thankful that he has the world’s best Master (me). He’s thankful that he has doggy friends with stinky butts he can sniff. And most of all, he’s thankful for you, his fans who are entertained by his K9 antics.
November 27, 2025 at 4:08 PM
My sweet butterball Scoot is so thankful that he’s a doggy. He’s thankful that he has the world’s best Master (me). He’s thankful that he has doggy friends with stinky butts he can sniff. And most of all, he’s thankful for you, his fans who are entertained by his K9 antics.
After a long day of training exercises, Sgt. DeShawn likes to kick back and let Ranger give his tired feet a long, soothing tongue bath. Oh, how that devoted dog loves the salty taste of his Handler’s skin. Ranger makes sure he gets his pink tongue between every single toe.
November 26, 2025 at 4:01 PM
After a long day of training exercises, Sgt. DeShawn likes to kick back and let Ranger give his tired feet a long, soothing tongue bath. Oh, how that devoted dog loves the salty taste of his Handler’s skin. Ranger makes sure he gets his pink tongue between every single toe.
I was chatting last night with a Scoot aficionado about the pop culture media that was responsible for turning us into beautiful freakazoids. For me, it was Chuck Jones’s “Duck Amuck” Looney Tunes cartoon. It’s curious how adolescence turned something traumatizing into arousing.
November 25, 2025 at 5:22 PM
I was chatting last night with a Scoot aficionado about the pop culture media that was responsible for turning us into beautiful freakazoids. For me, it was Chuck Jones’s “Duck Amuck” Looney Tunes cartoon. It’s curious how adolescence turned something traumatizing into arousing.
Someone recently asked about one of my first digital illustrations from around 2000—my take on the story of Sinbad and the Old Man of the Sea. I remember as a kid feeling squirmy reading about a grown man being treated like an animal on a desert island by a wicked old geezer.
November 24, 2025 at 2:54 PM
Someone recently asked about one of my first digital illustrations from around 2000—my take on the story of Sinbad and the Old Man of the Sea. I remember as a kid feeling squirmy reading about a grown man being treated like an animal on a desert island by a wicked old geezer.
Did I ever show you this pic of me a lad? I was such a precocious student - I’m sure my teachers remembered me for the rest of their lives.
November 23, 2025 at 4:58 PM
Did I ever show you this pic of me a lad? I was such a precocious student - I’m sure my teachers remembered me for the rest of their lives.
Now how did a wasp’s nest end up falling into my backyard? It’s almost as if some wicked old queen gets off on seeing a big man-dawg like my sweet Scoot traumatized.😈😈 Don’t worry, friends,I’m only into cartoon violence. After some boo-boo kissing, Scoot will be right as rain.
November 23, 2025 at 3:58 PM
Now how did a wasp’s nest end up falling into my backyard? It’s almost as if some wicked old queen gets off on seeing a big man-dawg like my sweet Scoot traumatized.😈😈 Don’t worry, friends,I’m only into cartoon violence. After some boo-boo kissing, Scoot will be right as rain.
Sometimes I forget how Scoot got his name, but then I look at how he’s despoiled all of the precious antique rugs that I inherited from my dear Aunt Rose. One would think with his diet of expensive premium dog chow that his asshole would be clean as a whistle and not so itchy.
November 22, 2025 at 3:55 PM
Sometimes I forget how Scoot got his name, but then I look at how he’s despoiled all of the precious antique rugs that I inherited from my dear Aunt Rose. One would think with his diet of expensive premium dog chow that his asshole would be clean as a whistle and not so itchy.
I’ve gotten used to seeing Scoot pinch one off in public, but I have to confess I’m still embarrassed picking up after him. At those times I think I might have been better off with a Yorkie or a Pomeranian. But you know what they say - big dogs, big hearts, big turds.
November 21, 2025 at 3:58 PM
I’ve gotten used to seeing Scoot pinch one off in public, but I have to confess I’m still embarrassed picking up after him. At those times I think I might have been better off with a Yorkie or a Pomeranian. But you know what they say - big dogs, big hearts, big turds.
I’m thinking a series of “Know Your Dogs” brochures might be helpful for visitors to our happy, K9-friendly town. To be honest, all our doggies are stinky boys, but some are stinkier than others. Peee-eeew! I’m looking at you, Flapjack.
November 20, 2025 at 4:17 PM
I’m thinking a series of “Know Your Dogs” brochures might be helpful for visitors to our happy, K9-friendly town. To be honest, all our doggies are stinky boys, but some are stinkier than others. Peee-eeew! I’m looking at you, Flapjack.
Every day, Ranger’s handler, Sgt. DeShawn, pushes him to his physical and mental limits. It seems like an exhausting life for an animal, but Ranger wouldn’t trade it for anything. Some praise, a pat on the head, a sniff of his handler’s crotch, and he’s ready for the next mission.
November 19, 2025 at 3:40 PM
Every day, Ranger’s handler, Sgt. DeShawn, pushes him to his physical and mental limits. It seems like an exhausting life for an animal, but Ranger wouldn’t trade it for anything. Some praise, a pat on the head, a sniff of his handler’s crotch, and he’s ready for the next mission.
There’s nothing that turns a standoffish man-dawg into a silly puppy than a nice,long, tummy rub. Just remember to bring hand sanitizer because if you over-excite them, you’ll end up with sticky hands. And besides, you never know what stinky ol’ Flapjack has just rolled in.
November 18, 2025 at 3:59 PM
There’s nothing that turns a standoffish man-dawg into a silly puppy than a nice,long, tummy rub. Just remember to bring hand sanitizer because if you over-excite them, you’ll end up with sticky hands. And besides, you never know what stinky ol’ Flapjack has just rolled in.
Scoot’s a simple, carefree doggy who foolishly doesn’t pay attention to traps or music copyright law. It always amazes me how the most vulnerable part of a big, strong dog’s anatomy is so easily caught in a snare. Do you think this is a design flaw that could be improved?
November 17, 2025 at 5:05 PM
Scoot’s a simple, carefree doggy who foolishly doesn’t pay attention to traps or music copyright law. It always amazes me how the most vulnerable part of a big, strong dog’s anatomy is so easily caught in a snare. Do you think this is a design flaw that could be improved?
It’s much easier to teach a dog a trick when his penis is locked up and isn’t a distraction. Scoot’s simple doggy mind is easily overloaded, especially when he’s performing in front of an audience. It’s the doggy version of not being able to walk and chew gum at the same time.
November 16, 2025 at 3:32 PM
It’s much easier to teach a dog a trick when his penis is locked up and isn’t a distraction. Scoot’s simple doggy mind is easily overloaded, especially when he’s performing in front of an audience. It’s the doggy version of not being able to walk and chew gum at the same time.
Someone just asked me, “What’s with all the monkeys in your images?” Well, for one thing, the natural cartoon hierarchy goes: monkey, mouse, dog. Besides, those furry critters work for bananas. And in these tough economic times, us pup parents need all the help we can get.
November 15, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Someone just asked me, “What’s with all the monkeys in your images?” Well, for one thing, the natural cartoon hierarchy goes: monkey, mouse, dog. Besides, those furry critters work for bananas. And in these tough economic times, us pup parents need all the help we can get.
Expensive helper monkeys became unnecessary about a year ago when the AI pup sitter shock collar came on the market. It’s no substitute for a flesh-and-blood master, but when I treat myself to an occasional afternoon at the day spa, I like to be Scoot-free.
November 14, 2025 at 3:56 PM
Expensive helper monkeys became unnecessary about a year ago when the AI pup sitter shock collar came on the market. It’s no substitute for a flesh-and-blood master, but when I treat myself to an occasional afternoon at the day spa, I like to be Scoot-free.
It’s hard to believe I used to depict Scoot with an unlocked penis and sometimes even sporting an erection. What was I thinking? I’m surprised I didn’t name him Rocket because of his big, red doggy boner. He’s so much happier with that nasty part of his body under lock and key.
November 13, 2025 at 3:49 PM
It’s hard to believe I used to depict Scoot with an unlocked penis and sometimes even sporting an erection. What was I thinking? I’m surprised I didn’t name him Rocket because of his big, red doggy boner. He’s so much happier with that nasty part of his body under lock and key.
Sergeant DeShawn doesn’t own Ranger; Ranger is the property of the Sergeant’s K9 Unit. Fortunately, because Ranger is the kind of dog that bonds to just one person, when the Sergeant takes his early retirement, he’ll have the option of purchasing his trusty K9 partner outright.
November 12, 2025 at 4:16 PM
Sergeant DeShawn doesn’t own Ranger; Ranger is the property of the Sergeant’s K9 Unit. Fortunately, because Ranger is the kind of dog that bonds to just one person, when the Sergeant takes his early retirement, he’ll have the option of purchasing his trusty K9 partner outright.
I suspect my sweet Scoot is being excluded from the pantheon of famous cartoon canines just because I depict him with genitals. I think having his penis locked securely in a cage is enough of a sacrifice for propriety. Scoot just wouldn't be Scoot without his big, swinging balls.
November 11, 2025 at 5:13 PM
I suspect my sweet Scoot is being excluded from the pantheon of famous cartoon canines just because I depict him with genitals. I think having his penis locked securely in a cage is enough of a sacrifice for propriety. Scoot just wouldn't be Scoot without his big, swinging balls.
Ranger works up a mighty thirst when he’s being put through his paces by Sergeant DeShawn. He knows that if he achieves the target set for him, he’ll be rewarded with a taste of his Handler. To Ranger, there is no liquid more refreshing than DeShawn’s urine fresh from the source.
November 10, 2025 at 6:18 PM
Ranger works up a mighty thirst when he’s being put through his paces by Sergeant DeShawn. He knows that if he achieves the target set for him, he’ll be rewarded with a taste of his Handler. To Ranger, there is no liquid more refreshing than DeShawn’s urine fresh from the source.
An active dog like Ranger needs to be constantly occupied. He’s not like a certain other lazy animal I know who is content spending the whole afternoon basking his fat, stinky balls in a sunbeam. Mind you, Ranger does seem rather high-maintenance.
November 9, 2025 at 4:39 PM
An active dog like Ranger needs to be constantly occupied. He’s not like a certain other lazy animal I know who is content spending the whole afternoon basking his fat, stinky balls in a sunbeam. Mind you, Ranger does seem rather high-maintenance.
I wonder what the boys are dreaming of. I bet for Sgt. DeShawn it’s having a meal with a pretty lady, and for Ranger it’s simply being praised by his handler. It’s hard to believe this peaceful-looking duo strikes terror in antisocial types who can’t accept the K9 lifestyle.
November 8, 2025 at 4:01 PM
I wonder what the boys are dreaming of. I bet for Sgt. DeShawn it’s having a meal with a pretty lady, and for Ranger it’s simply being praised by his handler. It’s hard to believe this peaceful-looking duo strikes terror in antisocial types who can’t accept the K9 lifestyle.
Sgt. DeShawn equips Ranger with night vision goggles and uses a drone when he’s tracking down a tail-denier that’s hiding in the woods on the outskirts of town. There's still a few anti-socials who can’t accept the fact that the world is a better place with certain types of men living on all fours.
November 7, 2025 at 5:33 PM
Sgt. DeShawn equips Ranger with night vision goggles and uses a drone when he’s tracking down a tail-denier that’s hiding in the woods on the outskirts of town. There's still a few anti-socials who can’t accept the fact that the world is a better place with certain types of men living on all fours.
Sometimes Ranger wears a radio collar when his Handler needs to have extra control over him on special missions. It’s all very hush-hush, but rest assured it always results in some gang of woof refusers being sent to the Rescue Society for treatment.
November 6, 2025 at 3:16 PM
Sometimes Ranger wears a radio collar when his Handler needs to have extra control over him on special missions. It’s all very hush-hush, but rest assured it always results in some gang of woof refusers being sent to the Rescue Society for treatment.
Ranger is so well trained that he won’t touch his kibble until he’s given the command to do so from his Handler. This is so unlike my Scoot, who inhales his food as soon as it appears. Imagine how much work it took to get this level of control over one of these hungry boys.
November 5, 2025 at 4:02 PM
Ranger is so well trained that he won’t touch his kibble until he’s given the command to do so from his Handler. This is so unlike my Scoot, who inhales his food as soon as it appears. Imagine how much work it took to get this level of control over one of these hungry boys.
Ranger’s T-1000 Dog Tail is a fiendishly clever device with an AI in it that extends Sergeant DeShawn’s control over him. I’ve heard that it is like burying a second brain in a dog's innards. A brain that never sleeps or rests and ensures the animal executes precision commands.
November 4, 2025 at 4:45 PM
Ranger’s T-1000 Dog Tail is a fiendishly clever device with an AI in it that extends Sergeant DeShawn’s control over him. I’ve heard that it is like burying a second brain in a dog's innards. A brain that never sleeps or rests and ensures the animal executes precision commands.