Captain Cassidy
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rolltodisbelieve.com
Captain Cassidy
@rolltodisbelieve.com
I write Roll to Disbelieve. Gen X. Ex-Christian. The angel's name is Eddie. Live only by truth.
We cover three kinds of evangelical prophecy - plus a subtype that is so cringe your spine might just leave your body when you hear about it!

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The wild world of evangelical prophecy | Captain Cassidy
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January 7, 2026 at 5:23 PM
I have an incredibly smart torbie cat called Squeaky. She doesn't care about vacuums, but the laser printer is her mortal enemy. So I'm teaching her the word "printer" so I can get her mentally prepared to hear the machine running. And she's learning fast! Hopefully it'll ease her stress.
December 22, 2025 at 6:01 AM
Alpha Course 10 (11 in some variants) is about how to "receive the Holy Spirit." But almost all of the video is more salesmanship - for a reason. This video is meant to be shown during a weekend retreat - and it is very hard- sell.

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Alpha Course #10 talks in circles around speaking in tongues | Captain Cassidy
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December 22, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Until now, Alpha Course could pretend to be ecumenical. But now, the mask is off. Here are the influences that went into that Charismatic pivot - and Nicky Gumbel's own history with that faultline through Christianity.

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The weird Charismatic pivot in Alpha Course #9 | Captain Cassidy
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December 17, 2025 at 12:35 AM
I found out a while ago that in BlueSky's earliest days, people couldn't upload pics or gifs, so they talked like in Star Trek TNG: "Homer Simpson, retreating into the bush" and all that. I want that again. Let's normalize that.

Black guy in Old Spice ad, nodding in his shower.
December 9, 2025 at 1:55 AM
What evangelicals did to Christian music made an AI singer like Solomon Ray not only possible but inevitable. This story has been brewing for at least 40 years. (Also, I got to share my funny CCM parody links at last!)

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Solomon Ray has no soul. But then, neither does his industry | Captain Cassidy
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December 5, 2025 at 8:13 PM
The AI chatbot Satan in 'Text With Jesus' isn't real. But they're still acting like it's the real thing. Maybe that's cuz there isn't a real thing to fear in the first place.

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Text With Jesus: Why an AI Satan scares some Christians | Captain Cassidy
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December 3, 2025 at 9:18 PM
Happy weekend, folks! Today, we had fun asking "Text With Jesus" the questions we always had about a wide range of topics. Enjoy!

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LET'S PLAY: 'Text With Jesus' | Captain Cassidy
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November 28, 2025 at 8:57 PM
Usually, the President's Address at the SBC Annual Meeting is a strategy statement or an evangelism exhortation. This time, though, it was a desperate plea for Southern Baptists not to leave the denomination.

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Southern Baptists heard a very different message at their Annual Meeting this year | Captain Cassidy
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November 18, 2025 at 11:47 PM
Some very interesting stories hidden in the metrics in the 2025 SBC Annual Report! Decline, obfuscation, and maybe a little outright deception - for Jesus, of course, which makes it all okay.

(I've learned a bit of Excel. Fear my full-frontal nerdity.)

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The stories hiding in Southern Baptists' 2025 Annual Report | Captain Cassidy
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November 15, 2025 at 12:12 AM
Evangelicals remind me of gambling addicts with their constant cope about their win coming Any Day Now™.

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The amazing evangelical cope about their ongoing decline | Captain Cassidy
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November 8, 2025 at 4:06 AM
Evangelicals have discovered seniors are leaving evangelicalism (while still ignoring Gen X, natch, of course, like we Gen Xers care!), but it's still way too late:
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Evangelicals have finally noticed seniors (but it's too late) | Captain Cassidy
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November 5, 2025 at 2:25 PM
Meet Ashley, whose Great Evangelical Husband Hunt turned up empty. She did everything right, but somehow Jesus never dropped a husband into her lap.

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When the Great Evangelical Husband Hunt doesn't lead to marriage | Captain Cassidy
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November 1, 2025 at 6:10 PM
She did everything right. Every evangelical marriage guide would have said her fiance would be a perfect husband. But everything still went very, very wrong. An all too real fiction story:

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Women are the lambs on the evangelical marriage altar | Captain Cassidy
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October 29, 2025 at 12:45 AM
Absolutely loved these evangelical attempts to evangelize "postmodernists." As we found out last time, they can't even define postmodernism. So their strategies are *spectacularly* surreal - which does, let's face it, sound kinda postmodern itself.

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Evangelicals (think they) know exactly how to combat postmodernism | Captain Cassidy
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October 27, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Why #evangelicals think they hate #postmodernism so much despite being THE most postmodern people ever and not even understanding what it is in the first place:

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(And a surprise Creationist acknowledging the art and architecture sides of it!)
Why evangelicals hate postmodernism so much | Captain Cassidy
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October 21, 2025 at 11:42 PM
Alpha Course #8 accidentally gives us one of the biggest dealbreakers in Christianity:

When something's imaginary, believers in it can describe it in any way they wish. After all, who's going to prove them wrong?

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Alpha Course #8: The one that actually has no idea what the 'Holy Spirit' is | Captain Cassidy
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October 17, 2025 at 10:50 PM
The video games industry and American religion aren't that different.

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Hard times may breed easy video games, but they also empty churches | Captain Cassidy
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October 14, 2025 at 6:35 PM
A god who sets up elaborate coincidences to guide some followers, but refuses to rescue children molested by ministers. That's the dark side of divine guidance: A god who's either fantastically stupid or tremendously evil -- or, dare I say, nonexistent.

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The dark side of divine guidance (Alpha Course #7) | Captain Cassidy
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October 11, 2025 at 12:00 AM
No matter how many times evangelicals and Catholics insist there's some massive Gen Z revival, the numbers so far don't support their claims.

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The ongoing myth of Gen Z revival | Captain Cassidy
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October 3, 2025 at 9:41 AM
Alpha Course #7: Divine guidance. Christians can't even decide what it looks like, much less how it works. No surprise, though, right? It's really hard to pin down something imaginary.

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Alpha Course #7: The one with wild guesses about divine guidance | Captain Cassidy
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September 30, 2025 at 11:28 PM
So you weren't Raptured after all: A coping guide for the 'left behind'

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So you weren't Raptured after all: A coping guide for the 'left behind' | Captain Cassidy
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September 28, 2025 at 11:22 PM
Once again, the Rapture. Like all the other times. But this time for sure! Really!

We explore some of the underpinnings that run through all of these failed predictions. Plus: DIAGRAMS!

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September 23rd Rapture: This time for sure! | Captain Cassidy
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September 20, 2025 at 9:58 PM
We explore how the Jewish taboo against eating pork led to the ultimate rejection of all things Roman: Christianity.

This one became one of my favorite posts of the year so far. I hope you like it:

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Of pigs and pork: How the Roman Empire accidentally created Christianity | Captain Cassidy
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September 16, 2025 at 8:17 PM
There's no "quiet revival" - or any other kind, for that matter. Here's why evangelicals can't face that truth:

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The revival that never came: Hopes for growth, shattered | Captain Cassidy
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September 12, 2025 at 6:05 PM